http://www.cheap-heat.com WWE, TNA, ROH, NJPW - Blogs, Reviews, Top Lists, Indy News & Results Sun, 21 Aug 2016 12:23:32 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=4.5.4

http://www.cheap-heat.com/and-im-like-reviewing-monday-night-raw-july-26th-2016/ http://www.cheap-heat.com/and-im-like-reviewing-monday-night-raw-july-26th-2016/#respond Fri, 29 Jul 2016 11:08:31 +0000 Jake Drury Blogs Other Blogs Big Cass Braun Strowman Brit Baker Byron Saxton Cesaro Charlotte Chris Jericho Corey Graves Curtis Axle dana brooke Enzo Amore enzo and cass Finn Balor Gallows and Anderson James Ellsworth Kevin Owens Michael Cole Mick Foley Monday Night Raw 7/26/2016 Neville nia jax Roman Reigns Rusev Sami Zayn Sasha Banks Seth Rollins Sheamus Shining Stars Sonny Boy Stephanie McMahon The New Day http://www.cheap-heat.com/?p=16870 I’m late to this party. Reasons being that my apartment is still decimated because of shit landlords. The wife and I found another place to rent, so within the month everything should sort of be back to normal. Let’s get Raw. Monday Night Raw Opening I tried a website to watch the show, the higher […]

I’m late to this party. Reasons being that my apartment is still decimated because of shit landlords. The wife and I found another place to rent, so within the month everything should sort of be back to normal. Let’s get Raw.

Monday Night Raw Opening

I tried a website to watch the show, the higher resolution one has already been taken down. Don’t worry though, there is still a link to the show last night!

We open with a video package showing Ambrose winning at Battleground and Monday Night Raw not having the World Title on their brand.

We then get a NEW ENTRANCE SONG!!! YES!! I don’t care if it is better or worse, it’s different!!! It’s got the new roster and the new logo! Also the announcers are Nitro style. We got Byron Saxton, Corey Graves and Michael Cole.

Mick Foley and Stephanie McMahon are in the ring

• Foley introduces us to the entire Raw roster… There are like two or three people I forgot about that are on the roster, Alicia Fox and maybe some people I don’t recognize.
• Stephanie says Roman lost the championship match and now Raw doesn’t have a champion.. She says Seth had it won until Roman screwed it up. She called him a loser. This is the first Raw ever she says, that doesn’t have a champion.
• Foley said him and Stephanie decided that tonight there will be 8 men competing in 2 matches. The winners will face in the main event. The winner of that match will go on to face Seth Rollins at Summerslam for the NEW CHAMPIONSHIP…
• The new title is named “The WWE Universal Championship”???
• The competitors are named: Sami Zayn, Sheamus, Chris Jericho, Cesaro, Roman Reigns, Rusev, Kevin Owens and Finn Balor… WOW. Finn got quite a reaction and chant.
• Stephanie asks Charlotte to step forward. It’s weird that now with the Universal Championship, Raw has a World Title, Mid-Card Title, Woman’s Title, and Tag Title… Poor Smackdown!
• Charlotte is told she has to defend the title against Sasha Banks tonight!!!! YOU GO GIRL!!!

And I’m Like… That was sweet, they told us what is going to happen and how it is important. Not a fan of the new title name, but am a fan of the matches and participants to get into the title match. Everything went smoothly and am super excited for Sasha and Charlotte.

Fatal Four Way for Number One Contender Opportunity

Cesaro vs. Rusev vs. Kevin Owens vs. FINN BALOR!!

• Finn’s first Raw entrance… This is dope!!!
• IT SAYS BALOR CLUB!!!

• A little upset at the camera work because you don’t get that sweet shot where everyone puts their hands up to his entrance.. Cole runs down his credentials and talks about how Balor cleaned toilets for his young boy training in Japan, he started from the bottom.
• This has NXT dripping all over it. Cesaro made guest appearances and was part of the first Takeover.
• Bell rings and the battles start. The camera cuts are very very quick and fast, it’s almost dizzying.
• All four men are battling on the outside of the ring now. I have come to notice how often this generation wrestles on the outside of the ring. I am kind of begging for one match to not go to the outside.. Maybe a technical/scientific match. Maybe a wrestler whose wrestling style is in ring based.
• Owens and Balor keep matching up and Owens is so condescending. Owens does a belittling ‘too sweet’ hand taunt and tells Balor that “you should have stayed in NXT”
• Rusev and Owens have chosen to take out Cesaro and Balor. Rusev goes to pin Cesaro and Owens says “I am standing right here, let’s stay on him though”. Owens talks amazing trash in the ring!
• Owens is kind of the star of this match so far, he does this beautiful cross body reversal where he catches Finn, swings Balor around to Owens back, then hits that Finley finisher, The Celtic Cross.
• Cesaro attempts to swing Owens after an uppercut train but Rusev stops it. They fight each other to the outside and Finn sees his opportunity to jump to the outside onto all three men. The crowd is loving this dude. Way to debut my man.
• Finn has shown he is a high flyer, then he hit Cesaro with tons of strikes to prove his brawling, and we have seen his wrestling ability.
• We have had two commercial breaks and the action has never slowed down. We came back from break with Rusev powerbombing Owens and Cesaro who were superplexing Finn Balor.
• “This is Awesome” from the crowd, making Finn start an awesome streak for his first match.
• We are to the point where everyone is hitting their signatures and getting nearfalls after each move.
• Owens caught Balor with a Pop-Up Powerbomb and Cesaro stopped the count. That could have been it.
• Cesaro flipped out of back body drop counter to his Neutralizer and follwed that up with his gorgeous springboard spinning eurocut.
• Rusev stops the swing again and starts looking crazy psychotic. Owens is put in the Accolade and Rusev looks to have a legit chance to win.
• That is until Cesaro powers Rusev up in a suplex. That was an amazing feat of strength.
• Cesaro rolled through Rusevs Accolade and got a two count. Rusev pops up and superkicks Cesaro who bounces of the ropes with a desperation lariat and both men are down. The other two are on the outside.
• I noticed Raw is doing that camera shot NXT is known for where the camera glides across the bottom of the ropes and gives Raw a new perspective.
• Cesaro is able to do a swinging sharpshooter on Rusev but Owens comes in and stops that shit!!
• Cannonball by K.O. but Balor hits a Shotgun Dropkick and then a Slingblade to Owens and a dropkick to Rusev and a Coup de gras on Rusev… FOR THE WIN.

And I’m Like… Fuckin Finn you guys!! He didn’t even have his Demon persona either. That match was non-stop and everyone got their shit in in a way that made sense. I really enjoyed that match, let’s hope that Raw keeps this streak going!! Wow what a fantastic opening to Raw.

Nia Jax vs. Brit Baker

• Nia Jax is awesome, hopefully she gets that viciousness we have grown accustomed to.
• Nia faces some girl that hasn’t been on TV in my memory. She destroys her. Yells at her smacks her, tree of woe’s her and hip checks her.
• The crowd is kind of quiet but it’s more that they are in awe of her.
• Nia hits a leg drop and could have gotten the three but picked Brit up headbutted her and then another leg drop for the win!!

And I’m Like… I am cool taking it slow and steady with Nia. She needs to devlop her presence on Raw and with the Raw audience before we get invested in her and her abilities. She looked pretty damn proud.

Tom Phillips interviews Sasha about her match tonight. Sasha says she thrives on pressure and she finally gets to expose Charlotte. Sasha has a weird cadence. She speaks really fast then slowly emphasizes some words. Also some creeper is in the background. Also Sasha debuted a new catchphrase “It’s about to get lit “.

Fatal Four Way for Number One Contender Opportunity

Sheamus vs. Chris Jericho vs. Sami Zayn vs. Roman Reigns

• It’s weird that two Irishmen are involved in this title opportunity.
• As each man makes their entrance the announce team is brilliant at telling us who these wrestlers are, what they are about, and what their motivations are. That is a great way to get you ready to make a decision on these wrestlers.
• As the bell rings we get another new camera angle that is bad ass.
• The match starts with both heels attacking Roman Reigns as Sami stands back and watches what is going on. Then Sami jumps in with Sheamus and Jericho to beat down Roman to cheers from the crowd.
• Reigns is taken out and then Jericho and Sheamus team up against Zayn.
• Zayn fights both guys to the outside, then Zayn did his seated springboard flip taunt, which last night when he tried he mistimed the flip and landed on his neck. Tonight the flip looked faster than normal but he landed on his feet.
• Roman sneaks in and takes Sami down to a chorus of boo’s. Roman seems to look angrier and his strikes seem meaner.
• I can’t believe he isn’t a bad guy, he wrestles like a dag gum bad guy.
• He starts punching Sami in the back of the head and Sami fakes Reigns out and sends Roman to the outside.
• Sheamus is able to catch Sami and do the 10 beats of the bowery. Now we are getting to the signature spotfest part of the match.
• Roman even busts out an Undertakeresque jump over the top rope onto his opponents. The crowd reacts with some boo’s.
• Everyone is attacking everyone and no one really has an advantage for more than a move or two. That is until Roman starts in with his moves of doom, the clotheslines, flying clotheslines, samoan drops, drive by drop kicks and corner clotheslines.
• Sami ends the rampage of Roman by hitting a Blue Thunder Bomb. That gets a two count and Sami can not believe it. Roman is all BELIEVE THAT!
• Roman counters the Helluva kick with the sitout cross powerbomb. Sami kicked out because dude is resilliant as hell. Females and childrens are chanting “Roman”.
• Corey calls the sitout cross powerbomb the “Niagra Driver”.
• Sami hits a Helluva kick on Sheamus after Sheamus Brogue Kicked Roman. As Jericho and Sami both try to pin Sheamus as the crowd loudly chants “ole”.
• Sheamus almost got the win after breaking up the Walls of Jericho.. Now every guy has almost legit won it.
• Roman gets a head of steam and Superman Punches everyone in the match. Jericho tries to codebreak Roman but Roman botches a Superman Punch, picks Jericho up and does it again.
• Reigns howls for a spear but Jericho counters with a Codebreaker. Roman kicked out and the crowd is hot as hell for this.
• Reigns leapfrogs over a running Jericho and hits the spear for the win..

And I’m Like… This is interesting. Finn was cheered so loudly and now he is going up against Roman Reigns… How is that going to get people to cheer Reigns? I wonder if there will be a heel turn… I wonder if Roman is already heel. Like, in 2016, if your a non-stop machine that wins and is force fed to you, you boo that guy. Maybe WWE knows this and they now book their heels like faces and their faces like heels… Wrestling is weird.

New Day Tag Team Championship Record Breaking Party

• New Day is at day 337 of their tag title reign.. I don’t know if they added prestige to the belts or not.. I should remember more of their matches and segments but my memory don’t work that way.
• Big E makes jokes about what happened 337 days ago… He even makes a lesbian joke. Says Gwen Stefani and Jennifer Garner should be married.
• We then see a New Day video package.. it is like Jack Handy type stuff . We go through all of their catch phrases and segments..
• This video package is filtered with a sad pop song in the background, it feels like New Day died.
• New Day picks a person to be the honorary member of the New Day.. Someone in the crowd. I wonder if it’s a plant or not. They find a black guy in New Day gear that was in front row… I think it’s a plant… Like not a plant like Mitch, more a plant like he was hired for this segment.
• Sonny Boy keeps saying his name is Sonny Boy and New Day don’t believe him….
• Sonny Boy gets a chant from the crowd too.
• They start dancing and Gallows and Anderson show up, they start destroying The New Day!! Good stuff.
• Gallows and Anderson take out The New Day and walk over to Sonny Boy.. Big Sonny Boy chant breaks out.
• The club scares him half to death as the segment ends.

And I’m Like… Congratulations to the New Day.. Hope they lose to Gallows and Anderson now!!

Curtis Axel vs. Neville

• Axel’s nickname is “Mr. Irrelevant”
• Curtis was picked last in the draft but he says “they save the best for last”
• The announcers hope the fans remember who Neville is and Corey says it might as well be a new roster because Neville basically has to start all over.
• Axel is wrestling smart, keeping Neville grounded and doing a lot of rest holds to wear Neville down.
• Neville is still strong as hell with the deadlift German suplex. Neville isn’t getting much of a reaction though. Once the Red Arrow hits the crowd is loud though.

And I’m Like… That was needed to remind us who Neville is and how he does flippy do’s. Not much else to type.

WWE Woman’s Championship Match

Charlotte (c) w/ Dana Brooke vs. Sasha Banks

• Both girls are breathing heavily… making me think they are nervous.
• Super aggressive collar and elbow by the ladies and they break apart with no advantage, they lock up again and Sasha brings Charlotte down, then the girls collar and elbow to the ground, they stand back up while never breaking the tie-up. That is a very hard thing to do.
• Charlotee went for a single leg takedown and Sasha was able to reverse it to a pin. These girls are taking a while to get the feeling out process out of the way.
• Once Charlotte threw a forearm on a distracted by Dana, Sasha.
• Banks gets upset and puts a seated straightjacket hold on Charlotte which hurts my back thinking about what Charlotte is going through.
• Charlotte rolls to the outside and Sasha hits a suicide dive, then the diving crotch attack where Sasha lands on her knees to the outside…. OUCH!
• Charlotte is moving in a stagger, selling the fact that this is a hard fought match. She kicks Sasha very stiff and Sasha flies into the barricade.
• SASHA PULLED AN EDDIE GUERRERO!!!! She throws the belt at Dana and falls down.. The ref looks and sees Dana with the belt so he throws Dana out of the match!! LOVE IT!!.
• She smiles and waves at Dana!

• We come back from commercial and Sasha has bother her arms being pulled back by Charlotte. Sasha fights back and hits a flying headscissors like she is high flyer from AWA.
• Sasha hits the double knees again.. I really worry about how long her knees will stay healthy by continually doing that move.
• Both ladies are down and start getting up at the count of 7. We get a yay/boo spot
• The crowd is IN. To. THIS. MATCH!!
• Sasha does her Lorraine Johnson knees in the corner move..
• Charlotte goes for a suplex, Sasha flips over and attempts a neckbreaker. Charlotte stops the momentum and hits a neckbreaker of her own.
• Charlotte does a moonsault, Sasha moves and Charlotte lands on her feet like a true athlete.
• Sasha runs at Charlotte while Charlotte is on the outside.. Sasha lands like she broke her body in half!! She was the aggressor but hit Charlotte too high and Banks’ heels touched the back of her head.
• Charlotte clubs Sasha in the back and does a superplex but there is a fight in mid air and Charlotte drops Sasha on the top rope belly first… Sasha falls to the outside…
• HOLY SHIT!!!!

• Charlotte lands!! That gets “Holy Shit” chants from the crowd… This is a fantastic match, it has story, it has high spots, it has fearless risky spots, there are scary body bending jumps, there is smart wrestling, the crowd is into it, innovative move sets, homages to past wrestlers. EVEN A ROPE GRAB after a Natural Selection.
• Charlotte puts Sasha in the figure four and Sasha starts punching Charlotte’s knee and slapping Charlotte’s face!! Charlotte goes for a Figure Eight but Sasha reverses it and they have roll out of the ring. Charlotte puts a figure four on Sasha while Charlotte is positioned out of the ring and using gravity as pressure.
• Charlotte goes back in the ring and attempts a figure four again, Sasha reverses it with a roll through, Charlotte tries to carry the momentum but Sasha rolls with Charlotte and locks in THE BANKSTATEMENT. Charlotte rolls it into a pin but Sasha rolls with her again to HOLD THE MOVE!!
• Charlotte got her foot on the ropes. Charlotte gets mad now screaming at Sasha “You will never beat me…EVER”

• She runs at Banks and Sasha hits the BANKSTATEMENT AGAIN!! THIS MATCH IS CRAZY GOOD! CHARLOTTE TAPS!! CHARLOTTE TAPS!!! SASHA IS THE NEW CHAMPION!!! FUCKING YES!! FUCKING OH MY GOD!! OHMYGOD OMIGOD!!!!
• THIS FUCKING MATCH!! She is wearing her emotion on her sleeve. The crowd is on their feet.. LEGIT ON THEIR FEET!!
• Corey Graves says “the dream of a 10 year old girl realized”
• I can’t stand it you guys!!!! Look at our girl!!

• Byron interviews our girl who is trying to hold her cries in but CRY GIRL!! you deserve that shit!! I can’t get over it!! “YES!” Chants simultaniously with “You deserve it” I am getting goosebumps on goosebumps!!! Sasha is the savior!! I don’t know what else to say.. I’ma listen to her speak.
• “I did it!! This has been my dream since 10 years old. I told everyone I am the BEST. Now this proves it. This is the Era of The Boss. This is the Era of Change. This is the Era of Woman’s Wrestling” Look at her face when that line is delivered.

• That is emotion, pure unbridled emotion. That is passion seeping through a soul. THAT IS WRESTLING!! That is making something of yourself and your dreams. That is perserverance when times were tough and life was tougher. That was deep in your heart knowing this is the only thing you want in life. That is pride.. So much pride it overwhelms you and makes you want to cry. Tears of Joy brought on by years of frustration. That is acceptance.
• She continues “and I promise you EVERYTIME I STEP IN THIS RING…. (YES! chants from the crowd) I promise you I WILL SHOW why I am champion and I will show you why I am The Boss.”

And I’m Like… What the hell man?!?! What is going on.. This came out of nowhere and this blew the roof off the place and every home watching Raw. I don’t have words for this. Sasha has been my all time favorite wrestler for over 3 or 4 years… She fucking did it!! She beat Charlotte like we have been clamoring for for over a year. Man this is why I am a fan. I am ecstatic!! That match and moment was fantastic and will be in my memories forever.

Braun Strowman vs. James Ellsworth

• James is interviewed by Saxton while Braun walks to the ring. The mic is only for those at home and it was different and I liked it!! Do more of that.
• Braun walks to James and Ellsworth punches Strowman who no sells the punches.
• This is such a destructive match. For sure the match we need to calm down after that barn burner.
• Reverse Chokeslam by Strowman for the win.. Good finisher for Braun.

And I’m Like… That was something to wash down the greatness that was Sasha and Charlotte. Braun is a forced to be reckoned with. Interesting to see where this will go.

Golden Truth has been walking around back catching Pokemons.

Enzo and Cass vs. Shining Stars

• Enzo says Monday Night got a little more Raw. He then sings I like it Raw . Cass says he likes Raw egg whites…
• Shining Stars come out and they saw Puerto Rico has Raw beauty.
• Primo and Epico already are in charge of Enzo Amore.
• The crowd will not be in this because Shining Stars ain’t gon beat The Realest Guys in the Room.
• Cass gets tagged in quickly and hits his moves of doom. There is a bit where Golden Truth walk through the match trying to catch Pokemons.

And I’m Like… That was a squash, that was Enzo and Cass getting their shit in.

Roman and Finn talk in the back stage about being Samoan and Irish… Finn looks like Suede Thompson .

Number 1 contender match for the WWE Universal Championship

Finn Balor vs. Roman Reigns

• If Finn wins, we see the Demon at Summerslam right?
• Roman comes out to boo’s and more boo’s.
• The match starts and Roman tosses Finn across the ring like a little boy would be tossed into the deep end by his father to teach him how to swim.
• Roman is wrestling heel, that is strange.. There are strikes and chokes and a certain viciousness that looks like every move harms Balor.
• Roman lays in about 20 clotheslines in the corner that basically knocks Finn out. Roman is a bad guy tonight.
• Finn kicked out and Roman was holding his leg while both men were getting to their feet. Balor is trying to figure out how to stop Roman, the guy has endurance and can hit big moves all night.
• Roman even does a rest hold to Balor.. He is begging to get boo’d with these heel tactics.
• Roman rolls up Finn in a schoolboy, Finn doesn’t kick out, Roman just lifts Balor so the one armed powerbomb looks like it makes sense and is devastating.
• Balor kicked Roman in the face and Reigns toppled to the outside. Balor then soccerball kicked Roman in the face!!
• This match is pure basic storytelling. Roman is the bad guy, Finn is the good guy. Roman does cheap tricks, Finn overcomes them and proves he is better.
• Roman is trying to brawl out of a hold Finn has on.. an gets Slingbladed.
• Reigns sold his facial expressions of anger and joy.. Then he crawls to Finn with a smile. Balor hits a victroy roll for two and a half.
• Roman sets up the spear but Balor hit the spear followed by a shotgun drop kick and he hit the coup de gras… AND WON!!!!!

And I’m Like… Finn is going to Summerslam?…. FINN IS GOING TO SUMMERSLAM!!!! That match was alright, it would hace been better if I hadn’t been falling asleep.

Thanks for reading!

Have a good one!

-Bixby

http://www.cheap-heat.com/and-im-like-reviewing-extreme-rules-2016/ http://www.cheap-heat.com/and-im-like-reviewing-extreme-rules-2016/#respond Mon, 23 May 2016 03:29:20 +0000 Jake Drury Blogs Other Blogs AJ Styles and I'm like Byron Saxton Cesaro Charlotte Extreme Rules 2016 Results Extreme Rules 2016 Review JBL Kalisto Karl Anderson Kevin Owens Lana Luke Gallows Michael Cole Natalya New Day Roman Reigns Rusev Sami Zayn Seth Rollins The Bloodline The Club The Miz The Usos Vaudevillains http://www.cheap-heat.com/?p=16631 Hey everyone, I am like 40 minutes behind on the pay per view so I am gonna log on the network and press Watch from Beginning. The reason I am behind is due to a plethora of things. One, I decided that writing about wrestling is the lowest rung on the ladder that is being […]

Hey everyone, I am like 40 minutes behind on the pay per view so I am gonna log on the network and press Watch from Beginning. The reason I am behind is due to a plethora of things. One, I decided that writing about wrestling is the lowest rung on the ladder that is being involved in the business. I needed to climb that next rung, so I have signed up for a wrestling school and start training soon. That means less time, less time with family, less time with leisure, less time with blogging. I am still trying to make up for the time by sleeping less. I am unsure if I can keep up the pace of blogging that I have set. I was doing about eight shows a week not including pay per views. I haven’t cemented a new schedule yet. I will try to get all the shows in, but I might be a day or two behind. We will see how this plays out. I am excited to continue to learn about how the business works and hopefully it will also make my writing better. Let’s get to the show though, I need to wake up in about 8 hours from now, so hopefully we can get 4 to 5 hours of sleep!

Extreme Rules 2016

• I am kinda looking forward to the commercials they have during pay per views so I can fast forward them!
• The show starts with a video talking about how rules are here to keep us in line and tell us what is right and wrong. Tonight we make our own rules, like we are the Purge or something.
• The video runs down all of the matches and paints a damn exciting picture.

The Uso’s vs. Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson

• I expect a good amount of Cody Rhodes chants tonight.
• This is a Tornado Rules Match. These matches first started in 1936 in America
• This match started on the entrance ramp when The Uso’s attacked The Club during their entrance.
• It’s hot and heavy to start the show and we get a two count off of a crossbody early on.
• There is so much action and big moves already. The Club hit their finishing maneuver on the outside to an Uso.
• They then work on the other Uso by doing running boots in the corner and splashes.
• The Uso’s go for a double Uso splash and the crowd is boo’ing like crazy.
• Holy Shit Michael Cole says Tornado Tag started in Texas and JBL starts mentioning Freebirds and Von Erichs, That was about 50 years after the first one.
• Anderson yells at an Uso “do you know who you are messing with?” and then as he runs at an Uso he gets superkicked then hip splashed into the barricade.
• Keep your head on a swivel because there is no down time in Tornado Tags.
• Gallows is screaming at Anderson to get up, which he isn’t. Gallows decides to grab the ring bell because this is No DQ also.
• An Uso does a splash off the top but hits the bell. Gallows and Anderson get the pin very quickly.

And I’m Like… This match was fast and furious. It got the crowd hyped and since the Bloodline is getting boo’d it made the crowd happy. I enjoyed it, it was similar to a destruction derby. The Uso’s sell injury as Cole says they might not be able to get involved tonight in the main event.

United States Championship Match

Kalisto (c) vs. Rusev w/ Lana

• We see footage from last Monday when Rusev put the hurt on Kalisto with an Extreme Accolade. Cole says Kalisto has back injuries and we will see if that impacts him.
• Kalisto comes out and does his Lucha taunt like he is just fine with no nagging injuries. Then again he might be toughing it out..
• As the crowd chants for “Rusev” I am confused because I never realized how much Rusev sounds like Lucha when thousands of people sayhi it.
• Rusev is putting a bear hug on Kalisto to make sure the back is damaged.
• JBL points out that Sammartino beat Buddy Rogers with a bearhug.
• This match is normal rules, because the pay per view is Extreme Rules.
• JBL was talking about how Lex Luger held the belt for 523 days and Rusev put a torture rack on Kalisto which used to be Luger’s finisher.
• It’s kind of shocking how much history they are bringing up on commentary.
• Kalisto has a sleeper hold on Rusev and the crowd is kind of the same, in a sleeper hold.
• Kalisto gets a burst of energy and hits that hurricanrana where Rusev’s hand slams on the mat instead of rolling through, which adds much impact to the move.
• They go outside and Kalisto hits another hurricanrana to the steps.
• Rusev goes in the ring and then Kalisto goes for a SDS, Rusev reverses and rolls to the outside. Kalisto gets him back in the ring and goes up to the top rope.
• Rusev slams Kalisto from the top rope onto the apron. The ref keeps trying to put Rusev at bay while Kalisto is checked on because he hasn’t moved. The ref keeps pushing Rusev off of Kalisto. The doctors check on him and Rusev don’t care. He attacks and attacks, then hits the harshest looking Accolade I have seen.

And I’m Like… That was uncomfortable. Kalisto took some pain in that much. JBL points out how Harley Race beat Johnny Weaver for the US Title to become the first ever champion. Again with the history!! Kalisto is now getting looked at by the doctors. That’s 2 for 2 on matches ending and the doctors looking at the loser. Kalisto is breathing very rapidly and it’s kind of scary.

WWE Tag Team Championship Match

New Day (c) vs. The Vaudevillains

• New Day are talking about how Villains aren’t respectful. Xavier is asking to get DM’s on Twitter and he wants ladies to send him pictures and videos. They all have items. They have Francesca 2, the last Booty-O, Big E is holding two hoes,  they call The Vaudevillains hoes.
• The Villains come out dressed to the 9’s, if the 9’s were from the turn of the century.
• There is an “I eat Booty” sign…
• The match starts off with Xavier taking Aiden English to the woodshed. I am surprised Kofi isn’t wrestling.
• That makes me think that The Villains will get the pin on Xavier.
• JBL brings up the Freebirds and how Xavier is the Buddy Roberts of New Day. Very Underrated.
• What is great about the Villains is that they do Old School wrestling moves. JBL brings up Karl Gotch, Da Bruiser and Da Crusher.
• Xavier is able to hit a kick to the back of Gotch’s head and Simon falls in a very convincing way.
• Big E comes in and does Belly-to-Bellies, like a good number of them, JBL brings up Jim Landos, another reference to wrestlings past.
• The New Day are in control and using their physical abilites to stay on top. The Villains are able to counter with their smarts and explosiveness. Xavier kicked out of the Whirling Dervish and that confused the Villains and gave Xavier enough time to get an advantage.
• Big E is able to hit his flying Unicorn and he messed his arm up pretty bad. Then Kofi hits a kick on Gotch and Xavier hits a shining wizard to win.

And I’m Like… Big E keeps his arm limp and tries shaking it, I am sure it’s a bit hurt. As The New Day celebrates, the crowd goes in a frenzy. That was a fun match that again was high octane and had very little slowing it down.

Renee Young interviews AJ Styles and she has a choker on, just like Lana… are chokers back in style? Call Topanga Lawernce!

Intercontinental Title Match

Kevin Owens vs. Sami Zayn vs. Cesaro vs. The Miz(c)

• JBL and Cole bring up that Owens is the only man since the Undertaker to appear at every Pay Per View in his debut year. The Undertaker made an apperance at Summerslam which means Owens is the only guy to wrestle at every pay per view, also Undertaker only had 4 PPV’s to attend. Owens had 13
• The match starts and Zayn hits a Helluva kick on Owens to knock him out of the ring. Miz and Cesaro are shocked and Zayn looks very focused and a tad upset.
• Cesaro takes Miz out with a European Uppercut. Now Cesaro and Zayn are showing us a great little bit of wrestling.
• Once Zayn got Cesaro dazed, Miz came in and started the attack. Zayn is able to knock Miz to the outside and he does a flip dive to Cesaro and Miz. Owens is still laid out.
• “Ole” chants are faint but they are there.
• Miz is able to gain momentum and hit his sliding corner clothesline. Sami is able to turn the tide and attempt a Superplex. They tease a tower of doom spot with three guys and Owens comes in and destroys the tower and decimates the rest of the participants.
• Owens has his arm wrapped pretty tightly, since this injury bug that has infected the locker room for the past year showed up I have been nervous for everybody and aware of the tapes and wraps..
• Owens and Zayn are going at it in the ring and a chokerless Maryse is helping her husband on the outside.
• “Kevin Owens/ Sami Zayn” dueling chants.
• Things I like about Owens? He is vocal during a match, he is talking or screaming or making noise whenever he attacks to make it seem like he is using ALL HIS FORCE.
• Zayn and Owens are dueling on the top rope, Miz shows up, and Cesaro finishes it into a legit Tower of Doom spot.
• Sami and Cesaro are the first to recover, Blue Thunder Bomb by Sami and as he pins Cesaro Miz kicks Sami in the face.
• Byron says this match is stressful, so much going on and having to be so aware of everyone.
• Miz gets Sami in an exploder suplex. Cesaro grabs Miz and German Suplexes him while Miz exploders Zayn
• “This is Awesome” Byron brings up they are raising the prestige of this title.
• Cesaro has all three men in different corners and hits running Eurocuts on everyone, again and again. Owens is able to reverse Cesaro and Zayn and Miz both are on the lower rope. Owens hits a cannonball on all three men.
• “It’s MY TITLE!” Screams Owens. He attempts a pop-up powerbomb.
• Zayn counters and knocks Owens down. Cesaro lifts and uppercuts Zayn, Miz Crushes Cesaro’s Skull in the Finale and Cesaro kicks out at two.
• Miz is now smacking Cesaro out of frustration.
• Cesaro uppercuts Miz and decides to swing him and make me dizzy watching it.
• Cesaro spins Miz to 20 spins and then instantiously puts the Sharpshooter on Miz. Maryse grabs Miz hands, as the ref takes Maryse out of the ring, Miz taps and the ref doesn’t see it.
• Owens comes in and schoolboys Cesaro for two.
• Cesaro comes in and tries to Sharpshoot Miz again, Miz holds onto the ropes and Owens hits a Bull Frog splash on a suspended Miz.
• Cesaro hits the Neutralizer on Owens and Sami breaks it up at two.
• In a moment of brilliance Sami checks with the ref to make sure it was two. After a sign of relief he is able to hit a Code Red on Cesaro for two. Sami then in disbelief asks the ref if it was still two. AMAZING!
• Cesaro is going for uppercuts and Sami hits an exploder on Cesaro into the corner.. Owens hits a superkick on Sami as he was going for a Helluva kick. Cesaro gets hit with a Pop-Up Powerbomb. Cesaro is pinned 1…2… and MIZ BREAKS IT UP.
• He pulls Owens outside and Miz hits the Skull Crushin Finale on Owens. He slids in to pin Cesaro who KICKS OUT!
• They are all laying there as the crowd “YES!’s” this is great my heart is racing.
• Cesaro starts to stand up and Sami hits a Helluva Kick. Owens pulls Zayn off of Cesaro. Sami freaks out and just beats the hell out of Kevin. He looked at a prone Cesaro but chose to continue the beat down on Owens. Miz crawls over and pins Cesaro for the win.

And I’m Like… THAT IS AMAZING!! There were so many moments in that match. The beauty of that is that EVERYTHING they did made sense. Not one move was wasted. Everything was logical and made it easy to fall into the match and suspend all thought. The moves, the timing, and the STORY you guys the story. You had Cesaro show his moments of dominance, Sami with his perseverance, Owens with his opportunistic actions and Miz with his experience and wife to help him. The characters were able to portray who they were through fighting, the story of Owens and Zayn hating each other more than anything else. A Masterpiece. Dumbledore claps.

Ambrose Asylum Match

Chris Jericho vs. Dean Ambrose

• People seem to rip on the idea of this match. Everything that is suspended above the cage is from an Asylum. The mop and bucket are there because mental patients are sometimes given jobs like cleaning. There are straps to hold down the patients, there is a straight jacket. There is also feud based and character based items. Mitch the Plant was destroyed by Jericho, so there is a plant up there for retribution I assume. There is a barbedwired 2×4 which is the hardcore essence of Ambrose after Foley passed the torch. A kendo stick because that was Dean’s originl weapon of choice.
• Jericho gets worked over right away and tries to “escape through the door” this match is no escape. It shows that Jericho is the coward and not comfortable in his environment.
• After a bit of dominance Dean goes for hie is first weapon. A Mop. As he is near the top of the cage near the mop, Jericho catches up to Dean. Ambrose is able to grab the mop and pokes Jericho in the ear.
• There is a bit of mop action and Dean ends up literally mopping Jericho’s face. The commentary team sells how insulting that is, because the mop is so dirty and gross.
• Jericho hits Ambrose with the mop and attempts to get the 2×4. Dean stops him with kidney punches and a back suplex from the top rope. This is a fight so Cole is gonna call the punches to the kidneys
• Ambrose grabs nunchucks and Jericho grabs the barbedwire 2×4. Jericho laughs at Ambrose for his choice of weapons. Jericho asks Dean what he is gonna do with the nunchucks. They are there because Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are the sponsor of Extreme Rules.
• As Jericho doubts Deans ability to fight weapon for weapon. Amrbose shows he is quite skilled in the art of nunchaku.
• A bit of a beat down and Jericho is able to turn the tides. Chris then decides to leave the cage, Ambrose chases him and grabs Chris, Jericho grabs a kendo stick and takes Ambrose down.
• Jericho then grabs a leather strap and JBL says he knows how bad it hurts from when Savio Vega whipped him.
• Jericho hits Ambrose over and over screaming “c’mon whipping boy” the crowd is kind of dead, I don’t think it is out of boredom, this just isn’t a fast paced match and is telling a fine story highlighting each weapon. I think Mitch will finish the match because that is the only weapon outside of the straight jacket that has received any build.
• Ambrose is able to get control of the whip and goes to town on Jericho.. HE EVEN WHIPS HIM IN THE FACE!!
• Jericho is able to fight back and again tries to escape because he doesn’t want to be in the match anymore. Ambrose is able to catch up to Jericho and we get a yay/boo spot on the top rope that ends with Ambrose bouncing on the ropes to drop him on the crotch.
• Ambrose is going for a fire extinguisher, which I didn’t even know was up there. Jericho attempts to climb the cage but there wasn’t a weapon on that side, he attempts to go for the straight jacket which makes Ambrose drop the Fire Extinguisher and grab Jericho.
• Chris comes down with the jacket and Ambrose rushes over to get the extinguisher, Jericho throws the jacket over Ambrose’s face and kicks Ambrose in the head.
• There is only the plant left up there.
• Jericho then attempts to put the straight jacket on Ambrose and Cole brings up we have seen it before.
• Jericho is trying to strap the back just as Ambrose starts waking up. He fights out of the straight jacket and Ambrose is able to hit some of his moves of doom the chop punch and the rebound clothesline.
• “We Want Rollins” from the crowd.
• Ambrose hits a running bulldog and climbs to the top rope for his elbow drop. Jericho meets him on the top rope.
• Ambrose goes on top of the cage and does the elbow clothesline from the top of the cage. Jericho has a mark on his head from the strap and both men are laid out. The crowd didn’t pop much for that move, I mean they did but it wasn’t sustained. That’s too bad.
• I’m sorry Mitch the Plant weapon is up there and a bucket is up there. The mop was a ploy, we thought it was a mop and a bucket.
• It was a bucket but that bucket was filled with tacks. Ambrose pulls the tacks and the crowd pops huge. Jericho looks terrified and tries to leave the cage one more time.
• Ambrose gets Jericho on his shoulders and they do many fakes to fall in the tacks. They do three or four false tack spots. Making us want it more, now that it is introduced and almost happened we are ready for it..
• The camera pans from the tacks up to Dean’s eyes, like a plan was hatched. Dean goes for Dirty Deeds on the tacks but again Jericho reverses. He ends up applying the Walls of Jericho in the middle of the ring.
• Ambrose crawls to the ropes but is able to grab a kendo stick. Ambrose uses the stick so much that it breaks over Jericho’s back.
• Chris lets go of the hold and Ambrose climbs on the top rope. HE notices it’s splintered and turns it around. Jericho uses the fire extinguisher and hits a Codebreaker on Ambrose. This is so good, every weapon is a piece of the story, even the cage. Each man is battling with a ll they have. Each weapon get’s it’s shine in a way that once again makes sense.
• Jericho goes over and graps the 2×4 wrapped in barbedwrie and hits Ambrose in the stomach, in the back, in the stomach screaming at him “You Wanna Get Crazy”.
• Jericho goes for a final Codebreaker and Ambrose catches him in the air and drops Jericho on the thumbtacks. Jericho is shaking in pain. Ambrose hits Dirty Deeds and gets the win.
• Both men show the tacks in their body as neither look like the winner in this.

And I’m Like… That was intense. The ref goes to Ambrose and starts picking the tacks out. Jericho was tacks all in his arms and back and ass. The doctor is trying to remove the tacks as Jericho is screaming and crying . His back is bleeding like crazy. As the doctor and refs pull it out Jericho screams and yells at them. The one thing that I have to gripe about. The plant wasn’t used. Other than that, this was a change of pace from the rest of the show, but it is rightfully used to slow down because the next match is a submission match. This has been really good so far.

W WE Woman’s Title Match

Natalya vs. Charlotte (c)

• The video package is about how each woman was passed down a submission move from their family and each move was the essence of the families success.
• The match starts and Nattie gets three headlock takeover’s in a row on Charlotte, Charlotte adds distance and rethinks her situation.
• Nattie attempts a figure four and screams “where is your dad now?” Charlotte is able to reverse it into a reverse chin lock and asks the ref to ask Nattie.
• Natte over powers Charlotte, hits a rebound back suple but has Charlotte land on her tailbone instead of back. Then Nattie runs over the top of Charlotte’s head and hits a drop kick. Turns that into a Mexican Surfboard and Charlotte is able to squat out of it in an incredible showing of athleticism.
• Charlotte and Nattie end up fighting on the outside and Charlotte puts the chops to Nattie. Nattie is able to throw Charlotte into the ring post.
• They get back into the ring and trade submissions, a figure four for a cross armbar.
• Charlotte gets Backlund Strong and picks up Nattie with one arm and hits a powerbomb.
• Nattie makes the rope to a few cheers from the crowd after a leg lock is applied. Charlotte is working over the legs heavily now while doing a suplex onto the bottom rope of Nattie.
• JBL brings up the fact that Buddy Rodgers first didAs  the Figure Four.
• Nattie screams No over and over while she is in the single leg crab.
• Nattie is able to German Suplex Charlotte and puts the Sharpshooter on. Charlotte starts walking to the ropes but Nattie won’t break the hold before 5? But it is submission not NoDQ.
• Flair’s music hits and Flair walks backwards to the ring. IT ends up being Dana Brooke who comes out. She distracts Nattie enough for Charlotte to put on the Figure 8 and Charlotte wins.

And I’m Like… Why is Dana teaming with Charlotte? Because she was a mean girl on Emma’s team, but Emma is injured, so she is on Charlottes team. Dana starts strutting with Ric Flair, Dana is strutting like crazy and is the cheerleader for Charlotte. Dana is trying to raise Charlotte’s hand and Charlotte kind of pushed Dana away. Dana is strutting again and Charlotte looks kind of annoyed but into it.

WWE World Heavyweight Championship

AJ Styles vs. Roman Reigns

• Roman gets reactions, boo’s mostly but everyone is standing.
• As the crowd boo’s Roman, JBL says “Stars create reactions .How ever you feel about Roman Reigns, everyone has an opinion.”
• Roman is soooo John Cena… HUGE “YOU CAN’T WRESTLE” I think he can, but Cena used to get those chantsa bunch.
• Roman was getting worked by AJ, even with the brawling, until AJ ran into the ropes and caught a knee to the face.
• The crowd is chanting “Roman Sucks” which is funny because it’s a Roman chant, if AJ was more over he would be getting chants. The crowd boo’s Reigns and does anti Reigns chants which illicit a response. That response is what keeps him on top. Fans think if they boo the man “their voice will be heard” yeah it is heard and it makes it so every  Roman match is electric with guaranteed reactions.
• Styles is able to hit a forearm or two on Roman and he clears the announce table. Then Styles clotheslines Roman over the barricade next to the I eat Booty sign.
• They are brawling in the crowd and no one is really cheering because THEY ALL ON THEY PHONES! That is weird. You know what I miss about the Attitude Era, the fans who weren’t self involved and lived and died by the product during the show. I say this as I am writing a blog.. MY blog which makes ME self involved and not living and dying by the product… I am the problem just like the smart phone fans are the problem.
• Roman and AJ are able to get to the set where the Pre-Show team sits.
• They start fighting back to the ring, as the double replay shows, I keep thinking the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie font looks like Tomb Raider and I can’t not see it now. Like the FedEx arrow.
• AJ starts removing the padding and exposes the concrete. AJ goes fora Styles Clash but Roman fights out of it.
• AJ needs to pull out all the stops and he doesn’t hesitate to do so. The commentators talk about how this could be AJ’s only shot and his career can be defined by tonight. That is why AJ is so ruthless. That is a great way to put over his aggressiveness.
• Roman and AJ fight onto the table, Roman is able to get AJ off the table and into the crowd. AJ attempts a sort of running move and AJ lands directly on his tailbone as the table breaks. AJ lands horribly on his butt.. The crowd chants “you still suck” and yeah, New York / New Jersey is like Number 2 or 3 behind Chicago on my list of crowds that upset me because of their chants.
• Roman does a sitout cross powerbomb and only gets two.
• Roman looks to be in control and not hurt at all.
• Roman runs at AJ for a Superman Punch, but AJ hits a chop block on Roman Reigns.Roman’s leg is hurt and that takes away his Punch and Spear.
• This match has turned in AJ’s favor especially after he suplexes Roman into the turnbuckle.
• AJ hits a sliding knee on the apron to Roman’s head. He goes for a hurricanrana but Roman grabs AJ in a powerbomb type but AJ just hangs there. Reigns slams AJ into the apron electronic board, then into the barricade, then Roman running powerbombs AJ through a table.
• He howls and attempts a spear as AJ was crawling to his feet, AJ dodges and Roman spears the barricade instead.
• This match is tremendous.
• AJ rolls Roman into the ring and goes for his Phenomenal Forearm, Roman catches AJ when Styles was on the top rope with a Superman Punch. AJ crashes and burns.
• Roman is limping on his leg, AJ’s eyes roll into the back of his head.
• Roman hits a spear as Styles gets to his feet. They both are layed out now.
• The crowd is popping for all these moves, but they are stubborn, so since they chant “you still suck” and “you can’t wrestle” if the match is Awesome, they can’t chant it because foolish pride.
• The Club comes out and hit their Boot of Doom and Roman kicks out at two.
• Jimmy and Jey run out and take out The Club and Superkick AJ in stereo.
• Gallows, Anderson and The Uso’s fight to the back as Roman hit’s a superman punch on both of them.
• The crowd is so into this and reacting to every move.
• AJ hits the Styles Clash, one of the only moves that no one has kicked out of.
• Roman kicked out. AJ grabs the chair and attempts the Clash again. That shows experience, instead of being dumbfounded, he knows how to up the ante.
• AJ was back body dropped and hit his hip right on the chair. Roman went for a Super man Punch, AJ hits a Pele and hits the Styles Clash on the chair. An Uso pulls AJ’s leg a bit and Roman was able to kick out because of those added seconds.
• AJ looks livid. He takes achair to Roman and The Uso’s as the crowd Yes! chants with each chair shot. AJ laid Roman THE F OUT!
• AJ takes his elbowpads off and goes for a Phenomenal Elbow.
• HE yells “C’mon” AJ goes for the Elbow and the move that we have all envisioned for two months happend.
• Roman countered the Springboard Elbow with a Spear.

And I’m Like… THere wasn’t an Authority segment or Shane segment. It was just wrestling, every match had great pacing and told different stories. The last match was great, I know the Fatal Four Way is the match of the Spring, maybe even Match of the Year. This match though? It’s great Roman and AJ man, that was awesome. You know what was even more AWesome? SETH F’N Rollins comes out and hits a Pedigree on Roman, “Thank You Seth” from the crowd. People point out how flawless NWA handled the Flair and Steamboat feud that transitioned to Flair and Funk. This was a Flair to Funk transition. In the same breath we finished a feud that was very good with very good matches, and then BOOM we are off and running to the next feud. Rollins is rebuilt his new shirt has a crosshair logo with his initials. He is targeting that belt. To reclaim what is his.

Claps all around for this pay per view. I can’t heap enough praise onto this. Seth got an amazing reaction. Roman can wrestle a Main Event match as good as anyone. AJ delivers all the time. The rest of the card was outstanding. Giving us variety and different types of storytelling. This was a good night of wrestling you guys. This is exciting stuff. I am already getting texts about the Rollins thing so it’s a hot topic.. I am going to bed, got work in 5 hours!

Please Share and Tweet and all that stuff if you enjoyed the review, comments are appreciated at the bottom, compliments, complaints, or criticism is welcome.

Thanksand have a good one!

-Jake

http://www.cheap-heat.com/and-im-like-reviewing-monday-night-raw-april-25th-2016/ http://www.cheap-heat.com/and-im-like-reviewing-monday-night-raw-april-25th-2016/#respond Tue, 26 Apr 2016 04:21:45 +0000 Jake Drury Blogs Other Blogs AJ Styles Alberto Del Rio and I'm like Apollo Crews April 25th 2016 Byron Saxton Emma enzo and cass JBL Karl Anderson Kevin Owens Lana Luke Gallows Micheal Cole Monday Night Raw Results 4/25/2016 Monday Night Raw Review Nattie New Day Roman Reigns Rusev Sami Zayn Shane McMahon Sheamus Stardust Stephanie McMahon The Usos Vaudevillains http://www.cheap-heat.com/?p=16414 Hey everyone! I hope you had a good day or last few days. I don’t have much in terms of interesting stories. It’s been busy at my restaurant, and when your busy working like Rihanna work, work work work works, you don’t pay attention to what others are really doing. Some joke was going around […]

Hey everyone! I hope you had a good day or last few days. I don’t have much in terms of interesting stories. It’s been busy at my restaurant, and when your busy working like Rihanna work, work work work works, you don’t pay attention to what others are really doing. Some joke was going around about how Prince died from having to hear elevator music, but I don’t really know how to properly tell it.

Let’s get Raw shall we?

Monday Night Raw Intro

Recap video!

We see Roman and AJ face off and say why they are going to win and have the match of their lives. Roman gets jumped by Anderson and Gallows, AJ says he didn’t have them do that. Roman says “Whatever, 1 vs. All” because Roman be weird y’all.

Tonight is the Night plays and we get a run down of the show. Payback is next week already?!?

Shane McMahon comes out

• JBL still misses the Authority.
• Last week I made a comment about how Shane is revitalizing Raw like HHH did with creating NXT and creating new stars. HHH is playing real life Vince and Shane is playing real life HHH. Shane says we are in a new Era.
• Shane is still in charge because well, because we want him to be? IT’s weird Vince will listen to us when it comes to who is running the show, but when we cheer or our favorite wrestlers he is all “oh you mean Roman right? No? You don’t want him? Well, here is Roman! your welcome!”

Stephanie McMahon comes out

• Did you know that nobody do her like she do her.
• Steph comes out and is instantly condescending.
• Stephanie says Connecticut is sick of establishment telling them lies. She says she is one of them, it’s like a weird play on politics.
• Steph calls herself ‘Hartford’s Favorite Daughter” and tells Shane that this is his last night running Raw. The crowd no chants at Steph.
• She says at Payback Vince will decide who will run Raw… This story line is so strange. Shane loses to Undertaker so he can’t run Raw. Shane runs Raw because of what Vince said. Now Vince is gonna say who can run the show… Maybe the blackmail Shane has on Vince is still in play and Vince is trying to mask his failure.
• Steph and Shane fight about who Vince is listening to. If or if he isn’t listening to the fans.
• Steph said she wouldn’t leave and so Shane got security to throw her out. The crowd
  “Yes’s” then “ na na na na hey hey hey goodbye” But not too many youngin’s know the song so it dones’t catch on too well.
• LOL, so Steph pushes the security guards, they escort her, the crowd is quiet. Shane starts a NA NA Na Na chant and it goes strong for one round… This is sad.
• Shane brings out AJ for his match

And I’m Like… That was needed to advance the story, but at the same time, what was that? The segment fell flat for me because it felt like we were watching a brother and sister bicker over daddy’s attention and not two people trying to gain control over a show. The crowd didn’t know how to react that much either. Oh well, there isn’t a match at Payback but Vince decides who runs the show. Fingers crossed emoji for a brand split.

Sheamus vs. AJ Styles

• Cole and JBL are talking about how for male Superstars AJ Styles was one of the fastest rising wrestlers to earn a title match.
• Sheamus is growing out a full beard and it doesn’t have all those dangleys. HE is kind of changing his look a bit again.
• The commentators keep bringing up if AJ wanted help from Anderson and Gallows or not. All while AJ gets beat up by Sheamus. I don’t know what the story is going to be, it seems like AJ needs help to overcome the largest of odds. At the same time AJ says he doesn’t, do we believe him or not? Roman fans don’t believe him, but I kind of believe him. The disappointment he sold was perfect last week after the attacks. For AJ to go to Roman ‘man-to-man’ also speaks volumes for my abilty to believe his innocence.
• Cole and Byron are discussing how Roman has the same body type and wrestling type as Sheamus. AJ’s plan is to out wrestle Roman and he is trying that against Sheamus here.
• We come back from break and Sheamus is still in command as when we left off. JBL was saying that AJ can’t go blow-for-blow with Sheamus and he defientely can’t go blow-for-blow with Roman.
• Sheamus went to hit White Noise off the top rope and AJ rolls out of it and hits a powerbomb from the top rope. Sheamus looks disoriented and has neck pain.
• AJ is trying and succeeding at going blow-for-blow with Sheamus. I kind of wish that wasn’t in the match to sell the fact that AJ can’t brawl with the big and brawny men.
• Sheamus got a two count after a powerslam and the match is slowing down.
• Sheamus went for a cloverleaf but AJ was able to reverse it and somehow hit a Pele kick. The ref keeps checking to see if they are alright.. HE ISN’T COUNTING THOUGH!!! FOR REAL REF?!?! Pet Peev you guys, sorry.
• Sheamus blocked the Styles Clash and hit a clothesline on AJ for two. Instantaneously after the kick out Sheamus put the Cloverleaf on and AJ can BARELY get to the ropes.
• AJ is able to stun Sheamus a bit and hit a phenomenal forearm and get the win without Anderson and Gallows involvement.

And I’m Like… AJ’s music hits and Anderson and Gallows walk out with matching coats and give AJ the thumbs up. AJ looks on like he is disappointed… They are just standing there though. That match was dope though! AJ starts Raw lately and is able to work great matches and feel fresh. That is a good thing.

The Uso’s are weird as hell, they are talking all Jive with Roman. They say they are here to help him and I quote “sometimes the one needs help from the all” and Roman says “sometimes the all needs help from the one” and it made no god damn sense but they understood each other. Some weird family.

New Day Promo

• New Day puts over the tag tournment they started that is presented by Booty-O’s. Then they start doing a “ respect the name ” thing. For those unfamiliar, its something with Birdman.
• New Day say once the win they will party like it is “1999”

VaudeVillains Interrupt

• Villains call themselves “gentlemen from a bygone era” they talk about how they are going to win and call Enzo and Cass ‘Mange rodents’ like they did on Smackdown. Villains also said they will party like it is “1899”

Enzo and Cass Interrupt

• Villains call them tweedle-dee and tweedle-dumb.
• Enzo says he wants to run into his own arms. I LOVE the verbal battles of the Villains and Enzo and Cass. It’s like what our badass cool ancestors would say to people in 2016. New Day said Enzo and Cass’ catchphrases then spit their own.
• Vaudevillains are the bad guys here. New Day are themselves and Enzo and Cass are fan favorites all the way.

And I’m Like… This was kind of a character introduction. WWE knows they have first time viewers every week. They don’t know when the viewers change the channel, so we get recap videos of the goings ons and we get the reintroduction of guys for at least a few months so we understand what their basic character is. Good thing with this tag division is it only takes a matter of seconds to realize what each team is or their overall attitude.

Notice how the NXT Lock is applied. Sheamus did it too!

• Cole said Anderson and Gallows finisher is called “the magic killer”
• The Uso’s are still taped up so they will probably lose again.
• Gallows and Anderson have generic AS HELL theme songs.. so that sucks. Wish they at least had NXT to develop their entrances.
• Gallows and Anderson logo on coats look like a grunt
• I wonder if Gallows past will be brought up? He originally was a pill addict that would only respond when the bell rang. Then CM Punk got him off drugs and changed his name from Festus to Luke Gallows. After losing his leader, he joined a biker gang for a bit, got out of that and joined another gang in Japan, this time it wasn’t a gang so much as a club for bullets. Now he is back. He appears to still be sober, but still, that is a hell of a character arc.
• Jey Uso is on his DDP game with all these bandages.
• Gallows and Anderson are roughnecks and don’t use many wrestling moves, more brawling and strikes. The Uso’s are getting their asses kicked though.
• Anderson and Gallows are targeting the shoulder of Jey, but I don’t think they are used to wrestling in front of a Raw crowd on Raw. I am not conditioned to appreciate wear down holds on Monday’s between 7 pm and 10 pm central time.
• Jey is still getting worked over. He maybe got two or three punches in for the first segment.
• The beatdown was worth it though, when we came back from break Jimmy got the hot tag and the crowd popped for it. They also boo’d because Roman heat is oily and Uso’s got some of it from sharing his hair product.
• Jimmy dives through the second rope in the corner like this was NWA: Smoky Mountain or something.
• Gallows and Anderson hit he Magic Killer and they dominate.

And I’m Like… Barring the injury, Anderson and Gallows beat one of the top teams in WWE for the past decade almost. That is a way to debut and make a statement. They kind of play off like Anderson is the leader and Gallows is just there to help dole out punishment. Roman came out to help his cousins and Connecticut showers boo’s on him. UGH! So these guys can’t take on one guy? Gallows sweats a lot too. Like the ring was a sauna or something.

AJ is in the back getting interviewed by Renee when Gallows and Anderson show up. Anderson asks Renee to walk away, then they talk to AJ in front of the camera anyway. They promised they won’t jeopardize AJ’s title opportunity. They promise that their friendship is forever and they are just here to have Style’s back.

We are getting a video package of Zayn and Owens!! It starts with the Royal Rumble when Zayn came out and confronted Owens. Then cuts to an old photo album interspersed with personal stories about how they came to be close friends. They were there for weddings and child births and were best friends. Then we see Sami winning the NXT Title and Owens instantly apron powerbombing him and leaving Sami injured and stretchered out.

Owens says he couldn’t stand seeing Sami achieve the goal of WWE first. Owens told Sami they are brothers and Zayn questions if that is what people do to family. Owens says he always does what he has to do to get ahead. He only wanted to be champion and Sami was champion.

Owens points out that he has had a great career trajectory since taking Zayn out. Sami said while he was injured Owens debuted on Raw and beat Cena. Zayn feels like Owens took his debut. Owens is set on Zayn screwing him out of a title at Royal Rumble. Owens says he is the victim. THIS IS AWESOME YOU GUYS!!

And I’m Like… WOW! Both guys have strong reasons for their feelings. Both sides can be rationalized. Ugh, this is so good. You know how Zayn and Nakamura got a chant that was “fight forever”? Yeah well chant that at Owens and Zayn please, they know how to tell stories and be themselves. They are made for professional wrestling and we are blessed to witness this and everything before or after it.

Sami Zayn vs. Rusev w/ Lana

• Rusev’s long hair makes him look skinnier. It’s weird that the League don’t accompany each other to the ring.
• Rusev keeps trying to close in on Zayn who is attempting to keep his distance.
• Connecticut’s crowd is basic. They don’t sustain any of their chants.
• Sami isn’t able to brawl with Rusev, though he did try. Zayn had more luck with his high flying based offense.
• Once Zayn attempts anything other than fast paced high intensity offense, Rusev is able to gain advantage.
• That rang true until Rusev caught Sami and snaked eyes him on the apron. Cole and JBL give Samoa Joe props for becoming new NXT Champion.
• Sami does a running moonsault off of the barricade and the crowd politely claps. Basic ass Connecticut.
• Rusev kicks Sami who goes into his concussion selling!
• We come back from break and Rusev is doing deadlift gutwrench suplexes. He attempts a third or fourth and Sami hits a lariat that stuns Rusev.
• Sami hits another one, and starts slapping himself in the face to gain energy to continue the fight.
• Sami reversed a bodyslam into a good nearfall and the crowd doesn’t respond at all.
• Rusev is able to defend and counter everything Sami throws at him. Sami is mainly throwing his body at Rusev. Rusev is able to catch it.
• Rusev hits one of the smoothest looking superkicks I have seen in a long time. Sami was doing his concussion selling and the whole move looked vicious, even on slo-mo replay.
• Rusev starts yelling at Sami and stomps his back for an Accolade set up. Rusev gets a stupid grin on his face. Rusev gets rolled up by Sami and Zayn gets the win.
• Lana then throws her shoe at Sami, she throws both of them.
• Sami walks backwards up the ramp and his music kind of dies out. Owens attacks Sami from behind and does a Michael Myers head tilt .

And I’m Like… I feel like it is 2013 all over again, when we were blessed with great matches every Raw. We have had two great matches and one tag debut. The Owens/Zayn video package is setting the tone correctly. This is another one of those ‘must have had that new writer in the show’ feels to it.

Apollo Crews gets interviewed before his match with Stardust, then Stardust shows up. Crews tells ‘Cody’ that it is an honor to wrestle him. Apollo says Cody’s dad Dusty Rhodes changed Apollo’s life and even gave him his name. Stardust acts like he isn’t Cody and says something about how Crews isn’t a star.

You know since Dusty passed away, NXT has gotten a bit less exciting. I think that’s because the characters aren’t as intriguing, which means that Dusty and his promo class were really helping the stars of tomorrow. When HHH said his void couldn’t be filled, he wasn’t lying…

Apollo Crews vs. Stardust

• Of course Apollo will win. Not only has Stardust had a losing streak recently, Cody uses Stardust to keep himself distracted from the pain of his dad’s legacy and death. Apollo blatantly makes Stardust remember why he isn’t Cody. That has got to be in Stardust’s head.
• Crews shows some agility and does the ‘too easy dropkick’
• Stardust was able to stop a mid-rope shoulder block by Crews, by connecting with a neckbreaker.
• Stardust is in control of the match by keeping close to Apollo and not letting him create distance.
• Crews was able to land a punch, then he hit multiple running attacks and back elbows. The second he got space his strikes became way more effcient.
• Stardust went for a roundhouse kick, Crews blocked it and hit a kick to Stardust’s head. Then hits his back spinning powerbomb thing and won.

And I’m Like… I didn’t really like Crews in NXT because he didn’t have much of a character, this is the same type deal. They didn’t even play into Stardust trying so hard to mask who Cody is.

Dean Ambrose Promo

• Ambrose says he isn’t doing the “Ambrose Asylum” because now isn’t the time for fun.
• Ambrose is able to put over how great Jericho is. He says he will beat Chris though.
• Ambrose says he fights for respect. So Ambrose is balding… what is his hair stlye gonna be in like 3 years?
• Ambrose delivers a fast paced promo about how he clocks in and clocks out, how he has gotten beat up a bunch.
• Ambrose tells Jericho to “light up your chirstmas tree jacket and get out here”

Jericho Comes Out

• Jericho calls Hartford a dumb and gets boo’s
• Chris is telling Dean that he elevates everyone he wrestles. Jericho tells Ambrose that he is gonna give Dean the best match of his career.
• Jericho asks for an apology for being disrespected. Ambrose won’t
• Dean attacked Jericho and the crowd cheered.
• Jericho ends up getting the Walls on Dean to end the segment and leave the crowd in a tiffy.

And I’m Like… This is about a fight, that is all about it. I hope Dean Ambrose wins, but I honestly don’t know. This feud is like Piper and Adonis with Pipers Pit and the Beauty Shop. Let’s hope it doesn’t go into Wrestlemania though.

Emma vs. Nattie

• Emma looks like she is Big Bossman in Demolition Man . She must know about the three seashells.
• Charlotte is on commentary, she has developed quite the confidence. Remember when she started? She was so awkward around Ric.
• Emma puts a full nelson on Nattie and takes Nattie to the corner and smashes her head into the turnbuckle while still applying the full nelson.
• Nattie makes Emma tap to the sharpshooter, just as the crowd chanted “evil emma”

And I’m Like… That was fast, I will probably forget about it tomorrow. It’s hard to build a woman’s division I think. Cole shows a Chyna video package. I can see why the Diva’s match was cut short.

Baron Corbin vs.

• Dolph Ziggler attacked Baron from behind. Like, Corbin did to Ziggler on Smackdown!

And I’m Like… It’s nice that every feud is different and built different. I also think Ziggler vs. Corbin is like Motley Crue vs. Judas Priest. Glam Metal vs. Metal. They are both rocker dudes, but hate each other. It has to be about subgenre’s of Metal music right?

The Miz and Maryse have a promo but it isn’t Miz TV. Cesaro comes out and tries to deliver some lines, he struggles because language barriers/ accents. Miz hits another line, this time a Clint Eastwood one, Cesaro finishes it again like he was Titus O’Neil or something.

Cesaro hits a Very European Uppercut. I don’t know if he is a super spy or Secret Service. Cesaro goes to swing the Miz and Maryse stops it by sacrificing herself. Cesaro holds the IC belt and the crowd goes mild. That segment with the right crowd would have been fantastic.

AJ stops Roman in the hallway and Roman is all “One vs. All lolz” so yeah.

NXT has a preview of Joe beating Finn for the belt, they will have it on Wednesday so that is cool!!

Roman Reigns vs. Alberto Del Rio

• If Shane is running Raw, he made a mistake.
• We have a dead crowd, it is at the end of the third hour bleeding into the fourth hour. Del Rio and Roman in a match….
• These two are good wrestlers but both are known to be boring every now and then… Now you have them close the show?
• Del Rio attacks Reigns, but doesn’t choose a specific body part. He just does moves and Roman fights back with punches and headbutts. It’s kinda like this Connecticut crowd.. basic.
• Del Rio attempted a basement superkick and Reigns countered with a Samoan Drop.
• Roman is doing his signatures and the crowd is boo’ing.
• As Roman is building to the Spear. Gallows and Anderson come out.
• Roman isn’t distracted and hits a spear on Del Rio for the win.
• Gallows and Anderson come down for retribution from earlier.
• Styles comes out and pushes Gallows and Anderson out of the ring to save Roman.
• Styles turns around after a valiant defiance of friends in honor of true competition. Roman superman punches Styles… Cause Roman a dick.
• AJ ends up hitting a phenomenal forearm on Roman to end the show.

And I’m Like… AJ doesn’t want their help it is obvious. It is also obvious that Roman likes to be a dick and attack people unprovoked. He isn’t cool, he isn’t respectable, he is THE MAN that is 1 vs. ALL. So yeah I don’t know. I know AJ won’t win, I just hope things stay interesting.

Well I just reviewed for about 6 hours, so I am headed to bed.

Please support the site and my writing by sharing and tweeting and stuff, I would really appreciate it.

Have a good one!

-JAke!

http://www.cheap-heat.com/and-im-like-reviewing-raw-april-11th-2016/ http://www.cheap-heat.com/and-im-like-reviewing-raw-april-11th-2016/#comments Tue, 12 Apr 2016 04:49:51 +0000 Jake Drury Blogs Other Blogs Adam Rose AJ Styles Apollo Crews Big E Bo Dallas Braun Strowman Bray Wyatt Byron Saxton Cesaro Charlotte Chris Jericho Curtis Axel Dean Ambrose Dr. Phil Dudley Boyz enzo and cass Erick Rowan Heath Slater JBL JoJo Kalisto Karl Anderson Kevin Owens Kofi Kingston Lucha Dragons Luke Gallows Maryse Michael Cole Natalya New Day Raw Results 4/11/16 Raw Review April 11th 2016 Ric Flair Sami Zayn Shane McMahon Sin Cara Social Outcasts The Dudleyz The Miz The Usos Xavier Woods http://www.cheap-heat.com/?p=16308 I am a little late to this party. Let’s cut the chitter chatter and get into RAW! Raw Opening We start with a graphic of Blackjack Mulligan who died this week. He is the grandfather of Bray Wyatt and Bo Dallas. You can tell that the eye’s and nose run in the family. Rest In […]

I am a little late to this party. Let’s cut the chitter chatter and get into RAW!

Raw Opening

We start with a graphic of Blackjack Mulligan who died this week. He is the grandfather of Bray Wyatt and Bo Dallas. You can tell that the eye’s and nose run in the family. Rest In Peace sir.

Shane McMahon comes out

• Is he running Raw? I don’t know. Did he say he was leaving last week? Yes. Did he run Raw after that? Yes…
• Vince shows us a tweet from WWE that says social media made such a fuss that Shane gets to host Raw again… This is weird.
• The more Shane runs Raw the less his jump off the Cell means.
• He says what’s up to L.A.  they respond with a “Shane O-Mac” chant.
• He says that Vince let Shane run Raw for his own amusement. Shane says that Vince must have been pretty amused. He then thanks the fans for being so vocal and so pro-Shane.
• Shane is either holding in burps or he feels sick and is powering through it. He says Natayla vs. Charlotte for the title tonight, also a Tag Team Number One Contender Match for the New Day’s Titles. Shane congratulates AJ Styles for being Number One Contender against Roman Reigns. Shane says Sami gets to face AJ one-on-one. If Sami wins he gets to enter the Title Fray.
• The crowd “Yes!’s”

Kevin Owens comes out

• Shane pulls his best Mark Halperin and says “with al due respect”
• Owens doesn’t think Zayn deserves an opportunity while Owens gets nothing.
• Owens says he wants his Intercontinental championship rematch
• Shane says Owens has to earn the shot at The Miz.
• Shane says he sees a guy pacing and running around since 2:30. I think he is referring to Mojo Rawley.. It’s actually better than that.. IT’s Cesaro.

Intercontinental Number One Contender Match

Cesaro vs. Kevin Owens

• Cesaro tears off his suit and has a Cesaro Section shirt on. He also has skeletal tape on his shoulder meaning it’s not fully healed either.
• The match starts with some waistlocking and standing switching. Cesaro out wrestles Owens who has to roll to the outside to re-plan his attack.
• The camera cuts to the back with Miz and Maryse watching the match.
• Cole runs through what the IC has been through the past two weeks with Owens losing to Ryder in a multi-man WrestleMania ladder match. The next night Ryder lost to the Miz with help from Maryse. On Smackdown Miz won his rematch.
• Cesaro is getting the better of Owens with switching headlocks. Cole points out that Cesaro wrestled for two months before he realized he tore his rotator cuff. I remember writing about a Cesaro match where he got thrown over the top and went right to rubbing his shoulder. The rest of the match seemed off. I assume that was the time the injury happened.
• Owens is sure to put on a reverse wristlock which I call the NXT lock because everyone in NXT or that was in NXT will use that hold.
• Owens knows he was being outwrestled so he is starting to work on Cesaro’s formally injured arm.
• Cesaro is selling the arm. JBL points out that when you have tape on your injury it actually makes it a target. It also helps the crowd understand the limb based offense.
• Cesaro starts holding his shoulder after almost every move he hits. He even has to convince himself he is strong enough for the Cesaro Swing, but he is not.
• We come back from commercial with Cesaro getting a nearfall.
• Cesaro is thrown into the ropes and flips over the top and lands on the apron. Cesaro hits Kevin with a boot to the face. Cesaro then climbs the ropes and does a cross body to Owens who rolls through it and puts Cesaro in the Crossface.
• They battle back and forth by countering the crossface and reapplying it. Cesaro then is able to apply the Sharpshooter to Owens.
• As Owens crawls to the ropes the camera cuts to the back with Maryse and Miz sitting down on a couch watching the match.
• Owens is able to knock Cesaro down and hit a YUGE frog splash for a great near fall.
• Owens calls for the pop up powerbomb. Cesaro turns that into a springboard spinning eurocut.
• Cesaro then goes for the swing but his shoulder gave out.
• Owens capitalizes and hits a pop up powerbomb. Cesaro lands on his head but rolls through and is able to pop up and hit the Neutralizer on Owens.

And I’m Like… Kayfabe worried for Cesaro’s arm. Real Life worried for the back of his head after that powerbomb. These two were able to tell a great story, have amazing nearfalls. I love how the WWE style is relying less on kick out’s of finishers and more reversals of submissions and counter wrestling of finishers. Owens is screwed out of a match and Cesaro gets an IC title shot.

We see a video replay of Natalya challenging Charlotte to a match and then a backstage segment of Charlotte and Ric Flair talking about how everyone picks on Charlotte and Dr. Phil shows up… says that Flair is holding Charlotte back.

Owens is shown yelling at Shane McMahon about how screwed he is getting. He then does a “with all due respect” line again… That is funny, I wonder if it is a subconscious plug.. Shane feels threatened by Owens and tells him he is kicked out of the building for the night so he doesn’t screw with Sami Zayn.

New Day Promo

• New Day comes out talking about NBA Jam. Saying the tag division is ON FIRE!
• Havve you noticed when New Day walks out Xavier is in the middle as they talk, once they get in the ring Big E is in the middle. I wonder if that is conditioning us, like Xavier is the talker and the manager so outside the ring he is the leader. Once in the ring we are preparing for Big E, who will be a top challenger to Roman Reigns soon.
• New Day says the Contender match is a tournament and shows us the brackets. It will be Uso’s vs. Social Outcasts, Golden Truth vs. Vaudevillains, Enzo and Cass vs. The Ascension, and Lucha Dragons vs. Dudley Boyz.
• They said no team will beat them but it will be fun to see them try!

Lucha Dragons vs. Dudley Boyz

• We come back from commercial with the match already underway. The Dudleyz are in control of the match.
• Bubba starts pounding on Sin Cara and talking all kinds of ish.
• Devon tags in and Sin Cara is able to fight back, every time Devon throws Cara into the ropes Sin Cara does springoard attacks and stays one step ahead of Devon. ONce Bubba gets tagged in we get a 3D. That’s the match.

And I’m Like… Kalisto is injured and we missed it… That was weird. The graphic for the tag tourney is great though. The New Day are on unicorns and knock a cereal box over which spills into the brackets.

The doctor is still out helping Kalisto.

Enzo and Cass comes out. Enzo reminds me of Lou Albano. They got the crazy eyes and the same type of New Yawka voice. Bubba had a heavy New Yawk accent until Enzo showed up. For real check out some heel Lou Albano stuff and you’ll see how he is like Enzo. Enzo even has the weirdest hairstyles, Albano stood out by hanging rubberbands off his face. Enzo calls D-Von Devin… Enzo said the only reasons he exists is because his parents got it on How Ya Doin? Enzo and Cass seem to have a cup-ah hate-ah’s. Hope Kalisto is ok…

Backstage we see Kevin Owens escorted out in his Tapout gear.

Roman Reigns Promo

• Coming out to some solid boo’s. I get my regulars and little cousin asking me all the time why the fans don’t like Roman. The general conscientious seems to be that the Silent Majority like him but the squeaky wheel are the fans that are against him. Problem is, the squeaky wheel people only spend money on live show tickets. The Silent Majority of fans but Roman’s shirts and seem to give WWE enough incentive to keep pushing Reigns as their major star.
• JBL points out how Roman is a badass but people don’t like him.
• He goes into his new catchphrase about how “he is not a good guy, he is not a bad guy, he is THE guy”
• Roman is talking like he doesn’t have a script. You can tell when the bullet points come up though because he pauses before he says some certain line.

League Of Nations comes out

• sans Barrett because they kicked him out.
• Sheamus asked how scared Roman would be to wrestle one of them from Payback.
• No one is scared of LoN.. Especially when Roman beat all these dudes last year.
• Rusev wants to be the face of WWE, he won’t be. He is the Nikolai Volkoff to Roman’s Hulk Hogan.
• What is funny is I am watching WWF Tuesday Night Titans and they are just now pushing Hogan as a star before WrestleMania 1. They way they push Hogan is similar to how they push Reigns now.
• The League comes out to beat on Roman Reigns.
• The Wyatt’s come out and save Roman.?
• They all throw the LoN out and Bray stares at Roman, things get tense but Shane McMahon comes out?
• Shane says he digs the Wyatt’s teaming with Roman Reigns. Shane says he wants to be selfish and see more of it. Roman and Bray vs. LoN in a main event match. Why did Bray come out though? Will we ever get an explanation?

And I’m Like… I usually don’t like Roman segments. Even though that segment really didn’t make sense, it was exciting and new. Let’s enjoy it before we hate it. I don’t know the story going in, let’s see if we need one!

Women’s Championship Match

Natalya vs. Charlotte (c)

• Byron interviews Dr. Phil….
• Charlotte comes out and looks like she is a queen. With the robe and the blue, we need a Queen of the Ring tournament. Throw some female referee’s in there too because they don’t seem to exist.
• The bell rings and Charlotte Woo’s in Natalya’s face.
• We get some waistlocks and standing switches. Charlotte and Nattie have wrestled twice before in one-on-one matches, this is the trilogy that hopefully will give Nattie her first win.
• Nattie was attempting some sort of choke but Charlotte does a massive spinebuster. Natalya is able to get an armbar on and Charlotte goes to the outside.
• Charlotte is really coming into her own as a heel wrestler. She goes to kick Nattie who catches Charlotte’s foot. Charlotte then screams “oh no! no! I didn’t meant to” then she goes to slap Nattie seconds after the sentence came out of her mouth.
• Charlotte gets a nearfall and yells at the ref for not counting fast enough. AS she is yelling at the ref she blocks his view of her choking Natalya with her foot.
• We come back from break and Charlotte has that leg scissor neck lock on and is flipping Nattie all over the ring.
• Charlotte does a flash figure four, she doesn’t go for the bridge and Nattie is able to reverse it.
• Charlotte gets mad and then puts Nattie in the Sharpshooter. Nattie is screaming in pain and Nattie fights out of it.
• Nattie hits a sweet looking German suplex off of a chop counter. She goes for a second but Charlotte reverses it and Nattie comes back with a roaring discus punch. The nearfalls are really picking up
• Charlotte went for a moonsault and Nattie moved. Charlotte has no where to go but Nattie has the Sharpshooter on. Ric Flair tries to interfere, the ref didn’t let him. Ric pulls the ref out of the ring while Charlotte taps… The ref calls for the bell and says Nattie won by DQ. The belt will not change hands on DQ. Dr. Phil says he love s the woman’s division and he is proud of them.

And I’m Like… Was this match and story only hear because of Dr. Phil or because it is building to something bigger? That was a fun match, lots of layers and stuff. That ‘s the kind of stuff I like.

S ami Zayn Interview

• Renee walks through Sami’s storyline and his awards if he wins. Sami says he has heart and sould and no one can that away from him.
• AJ Styles shows up tells Sami he will be the only Number One Contender.

The Uso’s vs. Social Outcasts

• The Outcasts are in full force. Adam Rose is rocking a robe that looks like The Genius’ robe had sex with John Morrisons robe.
• This match is five minutes in and Axel is working on a headlock…
• Slater and Axel both were previous Tag Team Champions while they were members of Nexus and New Nexus. Slater and Axel never were really a team though.
• Heath gets a nearfall and Bo leads a Bo train.
• Axle and Heath are celebrating and The Uso’s push them out of the ring and get a rollup on Heath for the win.
• As The Uso’s celebrate Karl Anderson and Doc Gallows show up. Is he Doc still or Luke? Don’t matter because they are DESTROYING THE USO’s it is almost Too Sweet.

And I’m Like… That is a way to get me to like an Uso’s segment. Gallows and Anderson must be upset they aren’t in the tournament. They are from Japan where there is tons of tournaments and series’ and stuff. That is something I am interested in and can’t wait for Raw or Smackdown to see what happens.  The Bullet/Balor/Styles club might not be a thing.

We come backstage and Maryse is complaining about blue M&M’s while Miz has cucumbers on his eyes. Maryse says “do we look like farmers?” Because Miz only drinks European imported water.

JoJo shows up to interview The Miz. Maryse stops the questioning and calls JoJo a Miz groupie. Miz runs down Cesaro and Cesaro shows up lookling like Agent Smith. If this is the matrix we know Seth Rollins is the architect.

AJ Styles vs. Sami Zayn

• This is kind of a dream match right?
• “Ole” chants rain down on Zayn, they aren’t too loud though.
• Cole points out that Sami is taped up because of his last few weeks. He wrestled Nakamura 11 days ago. Ladder match 9 days ago, fatal four-way 7 days ago, and a tag match 4 days ago.
• The match is pretty even, Sami is controlling it with arm work. The crowd “ole’s” while JBL tells us how important the WWE Champioship is.
• The crowd starts heating up with “AJ Styles/Sami Zayn” dueling chants.
• JBL makes another astute statement saying that Styles and Zayn fought so hard to be here, that this match is kind of a proving point for their abilities.
• AJ hits a snap suplex on Sami who kicks out at one. AJ goes right to a reverse chinlock because he knows Sami has a lot more energy than originally thought. AJ turns up the aggression and knee’s Sami squarely in the head.
• The theme of then night is waistlocks and standing switches. There isn’t too many collar and elbow’s or test of strengths tonight.
• We come back and see that AJ hit a reverse GTS or a fireman carry neckbreaker for two.
• AJ sets up for the Styles Clash bu Sami has the move scouted and is able to small package Styles. TWO!!
• Sami is landing big move after big move and the two counts are getting longer and longer.
• Zayn goes for a halfnelson suplex but AJ is able to turn that into a Pele Kick for two.
• Zayn and Styles fight a bit longer and Sami is able to hit a blue thunder bomb after dodging a punch. FOR TWO! “This is Awesome” from the crowd.
• AJ puts the calf crusher on Sami who is selling the move SO SO SO WELL! HE is reaching and grimacing and biting his knuckles and tensing up more, HE MAKES IT TO THE ROPES!!
• The crowd is reacting to every move these guys throw now. They got em you guys! These two got the crowd in the palm of their hands.
• AJ goes for a sunset flip off the top rope. Sami lands on his feet and dropkicks AJ. Byron lets out a super loud WHAAT?!?!
• Sami goes for a Helluva kick, AJ gets foot in the face of Zayn and hits the phenomenal forearm for the DUKE!

And I’m Like… The Commentators are very impressed by the match. They keep saying “these superstars are made for this stage” What a match you two!! That was fantastic, hard fought matches to stay challengers makes the title that much more important. I was wondering if this was 6 months ago we would be having Big Show and Ryback in a match. Oh how far we have come.

We come back from break and Sami and AJ are hanging out, winded, in the back when Shane greets them. Shane walks up and tells them how awesome they are and how we all appreciate it. AJ and Sami give a Firm Embrace

Highlight Real w/ Jericho

• Dean Ambrose is his guest,… I saw Jericho and fast forwarded it til I saw who came out. Dean brings out potted plants because he is back to goofy Dean Ambrose.
• Ambrose let’s Jericho know that Shane has canceled Jericho’s show and now we are watching the “Ambrose Asylum”
• Ambrose has a good sense of humor that doesn’t carry well in a wrestling ring. It’s the type of humor my staff and I have. Where you act like you are dumb and don’t understand stuff. Like, a regular was talking about building bluebird houses. So naturally my server and I asked him why are all his bird houses going to be blue? Doesn’t he have different colors. He kept trying to tell us its BLUEBIRD and a house for that Blue Bird. But we sold it like we didn’t understand and kept asking about yellow birdhouses, blackbird houses… That type of stuff. It is hilarious in the moment but not too funny later. Dean Ambrose is the same way. He rags on Jericho’s scarf and wants to know where he got it. Jericho says it was $700 and then went off on a tangent.. Ambrose wait’s then says “so you gonna tell us about your scarf or what?” I am sure if it was a private setting and only a few people I would find that hilarious, this segment? Not so much.

And I’m Like… That segment only existed to start a program with Ambrose and Jericho… I am nervous for what they will do. This seems like a perfect feud, but there are so many ways this could go wrong. Let’s hope we can stay entertained and invested!!

More Dr. Phil… I am about done with that

Apollo Crews vs. Adam Rose

• Adam Rose doesn’t get an entrance. Axel and Slater are not out here. Bo is though. Bo supports everyone. He is the greatest.
• The crowd is quiet because we all know Crews is winning this one.
• Adam beats on Crews and screams “is that your man?” the crowd does not respond.
• This is a showcase match and Rose has a reverse chin lock on… I mean your only on TV so much, might as well make it count. Ain’t nothing Showcase about a headlock.
• Crews hit his finisher quickly after that.

A nd I’m Like… I get that this is still an introduction to Crews, but for those of us that are NXT Faithful, this seems like a waste. He was never given a character in NXT and he hasn’t yet in WWE. I hope he can get deeper than “athletic”

Primo and Epico welcome us to Puerto Rico.

We get a Baron Corbin video package too. Him beating up Dolph Ziggler.

Bray cuts a dark room promo. You know Method Man and how he breathes and sucks spit in while he raps? Or Big Pun snorts when he breathes in? Yeah Bray does that… It kinda bothers me.

Bray is a good guy now, or will be soon. He said the city name before his entrance, he saved Roman from an attack, Cole mentions how many fans or fireflies Bray has.

Bray Wyatt and Roman Reigns vs. Alberto Del Rio and Sheamus

• Bray and Roman start the match by trying to determine who will enter the ring first. Bray tells Roman to leave who says no. Wyatt acts as if he were leaving but then opens the ropes for Reigns. Roman ends up not starting it. Wyatt keeps blind tagging after Roman blind tags.
• Both men are handling the LoN quite easily.
• Roman is fighting hard and everytime he starts making headway the crowd boo’s him so badly.
• They don’t like Reigns so much that they will even “Si” ALberto. They will even Si him when he sets up that lame ass finisher.
• Sheamus is still working at cutting the ring off so Bray is frantically pacing on the apron back and forth.
• Once Roman tags Bray in the crowd lights up. Bray is so energetic, urgent, frantic, and delibrate. He is perfect for a hot tag and he is so fast paced that he can keep the crowd invested the whole time.
• Roman comes in to help Bray and the crowd boo’s. Roman is taken out by Sheamus.
• Rusev tries to take Bray out but Wyatt kicks out.
• Strowman and Rowan show up to beat up Rusev, just so the match is even.
• Del Rio goes for the cross armbreaker
• Wyatt reverses that into Sister Abigail. Sheamus goes to break up the pin but gets speared.
• Wyatt looks at Roman with his arms out. IT’s like Roman has to go to his weird cousins house in Baton Rouge. HE sees his cousin with his swampwoods friends, Roman knows he can’t really trust this stranger, but at the same time he seems so inviting.

And I’m Like… I am all in on cheering for Bray! The Roman dynamic is interesting. Roman and Bray might be able to do a double turn. IT will be a great few weeks! After the AJ match I will be more interested in seeing how Bray will turn up.

Shane ran another good Raw. This was a fun episode of Raw that rarely lagged, let’s hope they keep this up!

Please Share and Tweet and stuff, it’s my only way of knowing people are reading this… Thank you so much!

Have a good one!

-JAke

http://www.cheap-heat.com/i-and-im-like-reviewing-wrestlemania-32/ http://www.cheap-heat.com/i-and-im-like-reviewing-wrestlemania-32/#comments Mon, 04 Apr 2016 03:59:09 +0000 Jake Drury Blogs Other Blogs WWE Network Reviews Adam Rose AJ Styles Alberto Del Rio Andre The Giant Battle Royal Baron Corbin Becky Lynch Big Box of Booty O's Big E Big Show Bo Dallas Braun Strowman Bray Wyatt Brock Lesnar Byron Saxton Charlotte Chris Jericho Curtis Axel Damien Sandow Darren Young DDP Dean Ambrose Dolph Ziggler Erick Rowan Fandango Godlust Heath Slater Jack Swagger JBL John Cena Kane Kevin Owens King Barrett Kofi Kingston League of Nations Mark Henry Michael Cole Miz New Day R-Truth Rusev Sami Zayn Sasha Banks Shane McMahon Shaq Sheamus Sin Cara Stardust Tatanka The Ascension The Rock Tyler Breeze Undertaker Wrestlemania 32 Review Wrestlemania Results Xavier Woods Zack Ryder http://www.cheap-heat.com/?p=16235 I don’t have time to say anything. I am 15 minutes behind because the wife was showering and I had to take care of the baby. I missed the opening video and introduction, the National Anthem, the entrances to the ladder match, AND the face-off between Owens and Zayn. Intercontinental Championship Match Kevin Owens (c) […]

I don’t have time to say anything. I am 15 minutes behind because the wife was showering and I had to take care of the baby. I missed the opening video and introduction, the National Anthem, the entrances to the ladder match, AND the face-off between Owens and Zayn.

Intercontinental Championship Match

Kevin Owens (c) vs. Sami Zayn vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Zack Ryder vs. Stardust vs. Sin Cara vs. The Miz

• So I got settled in with Zayn flipping through the ladder over the top rope and doing a diving corner tornado DDT.
• Sin Cara was climbing the ladder and Sami threw him on everyone.
• Stardust has some polkadots in honor of his father Dusty Rhodes.
• I feel real stressed out right now with everything going on and me feeling like I just dove into the match.
• I don’t think I missed any point of story in the match. We are to the point where people are doing their finishers… UGH!
• I feel like I woke up late for Christmas or something.
• Stardust took out his own special ladder with polk dots. The crowd erupts in Dusty Chants. Stardust starts spinning around in a circle with the ladder on his head and knocked most of the field out. Stardust got rocked with a Skull Crushing Finale. Owens then threw the ladder over the top rope.
• Once Owens had a chance to climb to the top, Zayn was there to stop him. Owens did a frog splash onto Sami Zayn who was on the ladder.
• I am watching this on the television so I won’t be able to get screengrabs. I will do my best to describe everything!
• Ziggler hit a big move on Ryder but the facebuster wasn’t his normal version and Ziggler landed right on his knee. Either that or he is selling it so he can slowly and realistically climb the ladder.
• Owens catches Dolph for a Pop Up Powerbomb. Stardust took Owens out and then Sin Cara lays Stardust on a bridged ladder.
• Cara is climbing the ladder and Zayn shows up to stop him. Zayn looks good for coming out of the war he was just in.
• Owens tips the ladder over and Sin Cara jumps on Stardust and they go right through the ladder.
• Kevin and Sami have a battle at the top of the ladder. Both men with their hands near the title. They are punching each other hard but neither man is backing down. Sami is able to bounce Owens head of the ladder. Kevin Owens tries his hand in a gouging match and gouges Zayn’s eye.
• Zayn hits a reverse exploder on Owens onto the ladder. Owens landed on his neck and all the referee’s ran over to him.
• Sami was so so so close to the belt and Miz stopped Sami to a chorus of boo’s.
• Miz climbs to the top of the ladder. Looks around and notices he is by himself, he takes his time to grab the title.
• Only for Ryder to toss him down and climb the ladder. Then Ryder grabbed the belt? Ryder grabbed the belt!
• Ryder and his dad hug as the crowd is shocked and cheering.

And I’m Like… If I would have started this when Mania started, would that have ended the same? I feel like this is a fever dream where neither Owens and Zayn won. There wasn’t really a story going into the match for Ryder. He was thrown in because Neville was injured, now he wins? Where do we go from here? Do people still care about Ryder? So many questions.

Chris Jericho vs. AJ Styles

The video package shows AJ winning his Raw debut over Jericho. Jericho tells AJ that he belongs here in WWE. Jericho notices the crowds reception to AJ and they teamed up. We then see Jericho watching Raw Replays on his computer. He turns on AJ because all the crowd did was chant for AJ Styles and not Y2J. Jericho says we chose AJ over him so he is taking AJ down like a scorned lover. The story is really Jericho vs. The fans and since the fans cheer AJ, Jericho goes after him. Then AJ stands up for himself chanting “y2Jackass”. After a few wins they traded, we get this match too. AJ is gonna show Jericho why they chant Styles name over Chris’

• Jericho comes out with massive pyro. It’s hard to gauge crowd reaction because of the sheer numbers of the crowd. Everyone is cheering and boo’ing at the same time.
• Jericho does have a killer jacket though. The light pattern is more different than ever before.
• AJ comes out and looks amazed. You can tell he is overwhelmed by the crowd size. He quickly goes back to normal. I bet he is glad he signed with WWE.
• Michael Cole puts over Kelsey Grammer doing the voiceover for the opening video.. I am kinda disappointed I missed it. Those are usually one of my favorite parts. I remember the one with Fred Blassie looking at an empty ring, first video package to give me goosebumps.
• The match starts and Jericho got some moves in, but AJ got the better of him with a hurricanrana and tossing Chris to the outside.
• Jericho does his little tantrum thing by taking Eden’s chair and throwing it.
• AJ chases Jericho and they trade arm drags like this is WM3 Steamboat/Savage.
• Both men start hopping over the top rope on the apron and trade places a few times. Jericho goes for his triangle dropkick but AJ is able to counter and hit one of his own.
• Any time that AJ seems to have the match in hand Jericho gets the better of him. Then AJ is able to fight back and hit another big move, rinse and repeat.
• Jericho’s taunting to the crowd too much, and that unfocused behavior is what leads to AJ’s comebacks.
• Jericho was sick and tired of dealing with AJ’s speed so he put Styles in a dragon sleeper. The pace slows down and the crowd quietly watches the match.
• Jericho blocks a kick to his head and turns that counter into a Walls of Jericho, that only works for so long before Styles gets to the ropes.
• AJ gets a nearfall with that springboard flip reverse DDT.
• Styles had Jericho on the top rope and was climbing up there with him, he set up a suplex attempt but then Jericho fights out of it and screams at AJ “you stupid idiot” AJ is able to grab Jericho and hit a top rope gourdbuster.
• Jericho fights back once again and puts the Walls on AJ, who can’t get to the ropes so he rolls inward and is able to somehow turn that into a Calf Crusher!
• This match is now telling us that no matter what happens AJ gets the better of Jericho at every turn. No matter the ring positioning or what is happening AJ is getting the better of Jericho. AJ reverses a Jericho dropkick into a Styles Clash attempt, Jericho is able to fight out and that brings AJ to the apron, AJ goes for a phenomenal forearm but Jericho runs under him, AJ runs at Jericho who hits the Codebreaker.
• Jericho is a little dazed and takes a few seconds to pin AJ, because of that AJ is able to kick out.
• Jericho is shocked, Cole explains the situation, Jericho is able to set up AJ in the Styles Clash. Because the Clash is AJ’s finish he knows how to get out of it, AJ reverses it into a sitout atomic slam. He pins Jericho and it’s a two count.
• There is a crazy pin attempt with a hurricanrana where AJ lands on his head, tries a bridging pin but Jericho pushes AJ off, AJ tries the bridge again, Jericho pushes Styles, Styles then sets up for the Styles Clash and hits it!!!! For two!!! This match has so many great wrestling sequences it’s so hard to digest it all. This match builds and builds and everyone is invested now.
• Yay/Boo spot and Jericho wins the battle. Chris goes for the Lionsault and like always Jericho lands on some knees. AJ sees that Jericho is out so AJ goes and does a sprngboard top rope 450 splash!!! For two!!!
• Styles starts screaming and looks like he is going crazy, he doesn’t know what to do… He goes onto the apron and yells at Y2J to stand up.. Jericho is slowly rising ans AJ’s eyes widen, the crowd cheers, Jericho pushes the ref out of the way and AJ jumps….CODEBREAKER! For THREE!!

And I’m Like… All my predictions are out the window. That match was fantastic, in the beginning I was mentally doubting Jericho’s abilities at this age. Why, am I wrong all the time!?!? I don’t know what is next with these two, I hope it continues kinda, Extreme Rules needs some matches.

Maria Menounos interviews Ryder. Zack Ryder talks about all he wanted was to hear his theme song at WrestleMania. He ended up winning and said it was his greatest moment of career and life. He can retire tonight and be a happy man. He is gonna go find Razor Ramon because Zack held Razor’s IC title at WM10 and Razor needs to hold Zack’s IC title. He said he lived his dream, he did it.

New Day vs. League of Nations

• New Day comes out of a GIANT BOOTY-O’s box of cereal, the cereal is huge. New Day come out like toys from the cereal box. I believe they are wearing some reference to something but I don’t get it. They have gold and black samurai outfits. Big E’s is white and gold though. Francesca is also black and gold.
• Barrett, Sheamus, and Rusev are wearing matching red trunks. Del Rio is wearing gold because he is not a team player.
• New Day has the longest tag title reign since Team Hell No! I don’t think the titles are on the line.. The crowd is 100% behind New Day.
• As Sheamus beats on Xavier , Cole says Sheamus once won the World Title from Daniel Bryan at WrestleMania. Cole brought up Daniel Bryan twice in this match already…
• Xavier is getting worked over and can not tag either Big E or Kofi in. Woods is trapped in the LoN corner and they are having their way with Xavier.
• I am not sure where Barrett is… Only Rusev and Del Rio are on the apron. I thought this was 4-on-3??
• Now the LoN trunks make sense. Sheamus is all red, Del Rio is all gold and Rusev is red and gold.
• Xavier is able to throw Del Rio over the top rope, Woods is slowly crawling to tag and took so long, Sheamus was still able to stop him, then randomly Xavier was able to roll out of the way, and counter Sheamus. Rusev took Big E out and Xavier is crawling towards Kofi.
• Kofi is tagged in and is jumpy jumpy punchy kicky. Kofi starts doing that Trevor Lee move .
• Kofi fights out of a Cloverleaf attempt by Sheamus but Rusev is able to kick Kofi in the head. Sheamus tries to pin but Xavier makes the save and the crowd is kinda quiet.
• Big E forced his own tag, hit belly to bellies, botched one on Rusev. Then while Barett was trying to get Sheamus and Rusev to stand all three got speared by Big E to the outside. It was a little too contrived and lost it’s momentous feel.
• Xavier and Kofi do this cool double stomp back breaker move. Sheamus kicks out and Xavier sells shock..
• Del Rio hits his Forever Double Stomp on Kofi from the apron to the outside. Xavier tries to fight Sheamus off but Wade sneaks a Bull Hammer on Xavier and Sheamus Brogue Kicks Woods for the victory… JBL says “the day the music died”

A nd I’m Like… On my predictions I am 0-3… I don’t get why these four would win.. I mean it was non-title so we should have known. Wade Barrett says no three men could go toe-to-toe with this unit. HBK comes out with his gear on?!?!? This makes no damn sense… I get why LoN won now… Mick Foley comes out in his gear… What is the point of this, I know that this is for a cheap pop and nostalgia moment but… AUSTIN comes out!

These are three Texas legends… They never teamed before, so why are they in their gear to get ready to beat up four dudes who won a match… This kind of lost it’s luster.. The nostalgia moment is cool but I wish it had better reasoning. Foley hobbles like he is wicked old by the way. HBK looks like he did the night he retired, and Austin has grown a little beer belly. There is a face-off, New Day pulls Barrett out of the ring (proving their 4-on-3 statement because now it is 6-on-3.) We see Socko and Sweet Chin Music, and Rusev takes a Stunner. Barrett gets thrown into the ring and we get a Superkick into a Mandible Claw into a Stunner.. New Day music hits and the guys who just lost are trying to get the guys who beat up their opponents to booty dance. HBK does a booty dance, Foley dances hip gyrations, and Xavier is twerking on Austin, Austin is smiling and starts two stepping and snapping  then STUNNER!!!! Xavier must be in heaven. That match was saved by the segment which if you don’t think about it makes sense.

Dean Ambrose vs. Brock Lesnar w/ Paul Heyman

The video package is showing Ambrose calling Lesnar out, ask to get his ass kicked. He then gets his ass kicked but comes back and asks for more. Brock is feeding him punishment and Dean has a tapeworm so he can eat for a while. Lesnar accepted a street fight invitation. Lesnar keeps hitting Ambrose week after week and Ambrose just makes fun of Brock for not getting the job done and killing Ambrose.. I’m sure tonight the whole crowd will be thinking why won’t you die.

• Lesnar comes out first and looks like he has been here before. Paul is looking around with a big grin and an extra stride in his step… didn’t mean to do gum references.. extra.. stride.. juicy fruit?
• Heyman announces Lesnar.
• Ambrose comes out and DOES NOT have a wagon! I swear if that wagon isn’t at this match I will take back what I said about that wagon segment from last week…
• The match starts quickly and Brock is already suplexing the hell out of Dean.
• I think this match makes sense because Brock wants to be feared and known as the conqueror, so if someone keeps asking for more, he won’t be able to handle it. He has to destroy and be praised for destruction.
• Ambrose attacks Lesnar with a cane over and over again. Lesnar is able to fight back and takes the cane to Ambrose, the crowd battles it out with chants of “let’s go Ambrose/Suplex City”
• Brock is getting ready to use kendo stick/cane and breaks it over his knee as if to say “I don’t need weapons” he then does a german. My stream is skipping too!
• Dean has a t-shirt that is a Suplex City shirt with the Dean Ambrose DA anarchist sign spraypainted over the shirt.
• Brock is up to 8 German suplexes. Ambrose keeps going for the kendo stick and but Brock steps on the stick which crushes Dean’s hands. As the Beatles would say suplex number 9 .
• I know we still need to see the barbed wire baseball bat. I just have no idea how Dean will gain the advantage. Oh THERE IT IS! Ambrose crawls towards Lesnar who is taunting Dean with the kendo stick, Dean hits Lesnar in the nuts…
• Dean gets ready to star in Texas Chainsaw Massacre but the chainsaw wouldn’t start. Brock does an over the head belly to belly and the crowd starts a 10 chant .
• Ambrose uses a fire extinguisher and then as Brock is dazed Ambrose viciously attacks Brock with a chair.
• The story is this is a FIGHT and Brock is unstoppable… Ambrose is relentless with his weapons and Brock starts looking like he is applying the brakes. Now he is just unyieldable.
• Dean Ambrose starts throwing chairs in the ring like he was an ECW fan . Brock goes for a German and hits it but Ambrose over shoots the chairs and Lesnar landed on them.
• Ambrose reversed an F-5 with a DDT! For Two!!!
• Dean loses his shirt to cheers from females in the crowd. Then Ambrose grabs Barbie the barbed wire baseball bat… Ambrose makes out with the barbed wire and screams BATTER UP BITCH.
• Ambrose goes to use the bat but Lesnar is able to suplex Ambrose and then hit an F-5 on the chairs. for three…

And I’m Like… What’s funny is this was a weapons match.. and NXT’s Zayn/Nakamura was harder hitting. NXT’s Joe/Balor had more blood. This kind of had carnage but the story was the same thread being told over and over again. Lesnar walks away by using the fire extingusiher as celebration. He then starts limping to the back because his nuts still hurt. My daughter who is 4 months old was laughing during the whole match. Also when Flair, Ziggler and Ryder did the Snickers commercial. I kind of feel bad that NXT was first this weekend, WrestleMania had a tough job following it. The visuals are amazing though!

The WWE Hall of Fame video shows us the new Hall of Famers and some things they said. Sting retired officially… That is sad. Seth Rollins hurt Cena and ended Sting’s career in one year… Poor Sting, never got his dream match. Unless Shane wins and at 33 we get both Sting and Undertakers retirement match that probably wouldn’t be that good in comparison to the other Undertaker matches.

Snoop Dogg is wearing Sasha Banks glasses by the way. Sting comes out and looks at the crowd, he looks hyped but he looks real real sad…

WWE Woman’s Championship Match

Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks vs. Becky Lynch

• The Diva’s Championship was retired today. The WWE Woman’s Championship is in now. FINALLY. Which means there is no champion right now, this will crown the first one. Charlotte was the last Diva’s champion and Nikki Bella was the longest reigning, that will go down in history forever. Who will be considered the first Woman’s Champion to kick off what Michael Cole called “Diva’s Rebellion” or the “Woman’s Revolution”
• Becky Lynch comes out, her steam took a bit to work and her hat came off but she has a crazy amount of energy. Lita is holding the new title and looks proud as hell.
• Then Sasha Banks music is sang and rapped by Snoop Dogg and that girl that sings on Sasha’s music. Snoop raps two verses about Banks and it gives me fucking chills!!! YeS!! Sasha… YAAAAAASSSS! She is a Boss and the crowd is reacting so loud. Thank you Sasha for having Snoop Dogg not have women all over him. Sasha comes out with Eddie Guerrero inspired gear. She deserves to be here. There is a pink confetti explosion reminiscent of The Cherry Blossoms
• Not to be outdone Charlotte comes out with a robe on that is made out of the same fabric Ric Flair wore during his retirement match. Hella pyro and a beautiful shot of Charlotte in front of the firework factory. This is intense you guys.
• Charlotte is holding up the Diva’s title… That is so earlier this morning Charlotte, keep up with the times.
• A “Woman’s wrestling” chant breaks out and Sasha almost starts crying.
• Charlotte sits back and watches Sasha and Becky try to pin each other and pretty soon everyone is pinning everyone. Sasha and Charlotte get rid of Becky and start going one-on-one. Sasha does a wrist grab run up the turnbuckle hurricanrana. That was an Eddie move!!
• Sasha is able to hit a double sunset flip on Becky and Charlotte. Becky kicks out as Charlotte rolls to the outside.  Any time a girl is in command the third wheel takes advantage. This pace is quick and non-stop. Everything has a sense of urgency.
• I am very surprised Becky didn’t dress up like a droog . I really am waiting for her to adopt an A Clockwork Orange ring attire. She has orange hair and her video deals with clocks…
• Sasha got taken out of the match for a moment by being thrown over the top rope. Becky tries to lock an arm submission in, Flair gets on the apron and the ref yells at him. Cole is on point saying it is noDQ so it doesn’t matter.
• Sasha stopped the submission but Charlotte and Becky throw Banks out of the ring again.
• Charlotte attempts the figure-8 but Charlotte’s arm gave out. It gave out just in time for Sasha to hit a GORGEOUS Frog Splash for a 2 and 7/8ths
• “Let’s Go Sasha” chants fill the arena..
• Sasha and Becky do incredible counter wrestling, it lasts for a good few minutes. Sasha is able to hit a double knee in the corner and play to the crowd.
• Sasha runs into the ropes and avoids Becky then she suicide dives onto Charlotte and hits a late flip that makes the move look so dangerous.
• Sasha has a woo off with Ric and Becky dives to the outside but hits Ric instead of Sasha to “Yes” chants.
• Charlotte sees everyone on the ground and goes up top and does a top rope moonsault to the outside. Charlotte throws both girls in the ring and does a double Natural Selection but can’t put either girl away.
• Becky’s make up is running and she looks like Clockwork Orange!!
• The commentators are talking about how amazing this era of woman’s wrestling is. I have always had a hunch that Woman’s wrestling would go this way because HHH has three daughters and he needs to create legends for his daughters to beat. Why not recreate the Flair/HHH alliance with their daughters.
• Becky gets the Disarmer on Charlotte, Sasha saves it and puts the BankStatement on Becky, Lynch rolls out of it but Sasha holds on.Charlotte puts the figure-8 on Sasha and Becky grabs Sasha’s arms and pulls her out of the move… WOW!
• “This is Wrestling” by the crowd. Charlotte tries to Flair chop both of them but the girls fight back on Charlotte.
• Once Becky and Sasha go at it Charlotte hits a spear on Sasha. Becky forces Charlotte on the top rope and these girls are FIGHTING for any type of advantage. Becky finall gets Charlotte in position, but Sasha climbs up top too. They push Becky off, but then Becky forces Sasha in the tree of woe, hits the superplex on Charlotte. Charlotte rolls to the floor to avoid the pin but Sasha is still tied up.
• Becky goes for something but Sasha reverses it and BankStatement. Charlotte throws Sasha out of the ring and Becky gets put in the Figure-8. Sasha goes to break the hold but Flair holds her back…. Charlotte won…

And I’m Like…. I am salty as hell!! That match was amazing and there is a dirty finish. IF you wanted me to not like Charlotte this is doing it. This was Sasha’s moment damn it. I was ready to cry tears of joy for Banks but now I am all angry! Not like WM28 Daniel Bryan angry, but damn.. The entire stadium lights up in crazy fireworks… CRAZY FIREWORKS!! This follows my theory of creating a legend for HHH’s daughter to beat. Charlotte will forever be on top… We will forever be wanting Sasha to win, she is our Eddie Guerrero.. That is amazing and sad at the same time.. That match turned my mood on the show so far!

Undertaker vs. Shane McMahon

This video package starts with everyone being shocked by the reaction to Shane’s return. Shane blackmails Vince into owning part of Raw. The condition is Shane has to beat Undertaker in Hell in a Cell. Vince chose Undertaker because as McMahon puts it “Undertaker is my bitch” that leads to Undertaker coming out and Pontius Pilates the situations saying the blood isn’t on his hands. Shane calls Undertaker a bitch so Taker gets angry, a few weeks later he calls Shane a bitch so Shane dives off the top rope and puts Undertaker through a table. Now we have a match, if Shane wins he controls RAW… just Raw, not the company, and Undertaker never wrestles again. Undertaker wins and nothing happens and everything stays the same.

• Shane comes out and it rains money on the crowd. Shane comes out with his sons and they show boat for the crowd. There are dollar bills all over the cell which is a cool visual. Shane gets his kids front row seats next to his mom and wife. Hopefully the kids will cry for visual effect!!
• Undertaker has flames shooting from the stage and there must be a mic by the gas because it is loud whenever the flames shoot up. Smoke and lasers and we have either The Undertaker Entrance or a Pink Floyd Concert . Undertaker is undertaking his sweet time, so I can pee!! Thanks Taker!
• haha I’m back from pee’ing and he isn’t even in the Cell yet!!!
• The bell rings and here we go. Cole said Shane’s gamplan is error, the more the Undertaker makes errors te floating and flying and stinging.
• Taker starts landing blows and Shane crumbles to the ground… I sometimes worry that this match will not live up to the expectations WrestleMania has created for Undertaker matches.
• We already got a snake eyes by Taker on to Shane. Shane does a flying elbow and shocks Taker.
• Undertaker is grabbing the steel aluminum steps! Shane sees that and tries to distance himself again. Credit to Shane for not going for weapons and trying to go toe-to-toe and blow-for-blow.
• As Undertaker goes for an apron legdrop, the stream freezes… As I type that it comes back with JBL repeating that “Shane is not going to quit” then the stream catches up and Undertaker grabs the steps like it was A Benny Hill movie
• Shane is able to put the Triangle submission on Undertaker. Taker is wheezing and I am not sure how Taker is getting out of this. Taker has snot coming out of nose and foam out of his mouth. Taker turns it into a pin and Shane kicked out with such fear of losing.
• Undertaker hits a chokeslam on the steps and that’s the match…. no I’m kidding, Shane kicked out.. Undertaker motions for a Tombstone and looks blown the hell up.
• JBL saves it with “that triangle choke took a lot out of Undertaker”
• Taker goes for an elbow on Shane who was on the steps. Shane moves and Undertaker hits right on the steps.
• Then like it was slippin time because Shane was sitting on the steps then suddenly he was off of them and Undertaker was dazed on the steps…
• Shane went to attack a grounded Undertaker but Taker put Hell’s Gate on Shane.
• Shane rolled over and reversed Hell’s Gate into the Sharpshooter and as the stream freezes again I can only imagine that this is a screw job….
• The hold was held on too long for the screw job to happen. Undertaker fights out and the crowd doesn’t react.
• As both men are fighting to their feet the crowd starts an “Undertaker/Shane O’Mac” dueling chant.
• Shane is delivering punches to Undertaker and then McMahon rolls to the outside. He goes for a weapon… a Trashcan actually. He is setting up a Coast-to-Coast
• Shane is allowed all the time in the world and is able to hit the coast-to-coast… Undertaker looks like he is dead.. He isn’t blinking and isn’t moving… Shane rolls him over and Taker kicks out at two!!!
• Shane grabs bolt cutters and is taking down a cage wall.. The crowd yes’s a bit and we get bolt cutter Benny Hill.. well we don’t get it, the stream gives it to me.. I wonder if this match would have more gravitas if it wasn’t for the stream problems…
• Shane is limping around, these two are moving like they have been to war in hell and come back to fight each other.
• Undertaker picks Shane up and runs him through the door. Shane’s head SLAMS against the announce table. “This is Awesome” from the crowd. Taker is taking apart the announce table..
• JBL is slowly losing his voice. Undertaker has cleared off the Spanish, English and German announce table. Shane is getting amble time to stand up but Undertaker is throwing monitors at him. What’s funny is the Spanish announce table had the old TV monitors and the English one had tablets.
• Undertaker sets Shane up on some barricade and Undertaker does the throat cut taunt. He sets up the tombstone and Shane reverses it into the sleeper. Undertaker is just holding it and drooling all over the floor. Undertaker decides to just jump onto a table and they both go through the table.
• The story they are trying to tell is Shane won’t die and Undertaker will keep doling out punishment. Undertaker can withstand punishment and Shane is fearless. Undertaker does what ever it takes to win and Shane does whatever it takes to survive.
• Shane took a full toolbox and hit Undertaker in the head with it. Taker falls on the table. Shane opens the toolbox and hits Taker again. Then the crowd starts getting excited.. Shane looks up at the top of the cell and the crowd roars. Shane is milking it and my heart is starting to race…. He is climbing the Cell, not Undertaker and Mankinds cell either. THE BIGGER ONE… Shane keeps climbing and the cheering goes to worried murmurs. Cole is calling it and repeating it… This is scary…. Shane looks down as the crowd chants “please don’t die”. This is one of those spots where if Shane legit ruins his life by injury it wasn’t worth it, if he makes it it is the single greatest moment of this decade maybe.
• For real my heart is beating through my heart, JBL screams Damn IT Shane STOP IT!! Shane jumps, Taker moves, Undertaker looks like he saw a ghost. Cole calls out “FOR THE LOVE OF MANKIND!!!” The commentators keep telling them to check on Shane… We see replay after replay and my heart is still crazy beating. Shane stirs and the crowd ROARS!
• You ever run into a door, or fall off a bike, or fall at all? How can we act like it hurts.. like it hurts but still. SHANE DID THAT and got to consciousness and is still moving. Like, damn… Human beings are amazng… Shane is amazing.. Wrestling is amazing…
• It’s funny how a spot can save a match.. I kind of forgot about everything that happened before it.
• Undertaker tells Shane to bring it. Shane sits on the stairs. Undertaker pats Shane on the cheek and tombstones Shane. He wins.

And I’m Like… Shane must love his family… Look what he did for them. This storyline has no ending, the feud had a hastily built storyline. Undertaker wins in another memorable match. Nothing changes.. Tomorrow was promised a change in the company, but the establishment prevailed. That was a fun match, in the grand scheme it was barely a pebble in the river based on story significance. Undertaker is still kicking ass and making one of the greatest legacies of all time. I may not be the biggest fan of the Undertaker, but HE IS THE GREATEST OF ALL TIME. Shane’s sons look so worried. Undertaker can have a match with anyone at any time. We should be honored to see this match and what two people are willing to do. That’s WWE pro wrestling. They will perform to the most extreme of the their capabilities as real people, even if the scripted story makes no sense, they will still go all out for entertainment. Not tomorrows entertainment, today’s moment. In 20 years no one will care about the story leading up to that moment. We just will remember the moment. Shane is getting stretchered out of here.. Now I am worried.. In 20 years from now, will Shane think it was worth it? That is pro wrestling… Shane is giving a thumbs up and I legit got a tear coming down my eye… Like for real that is passion, that is something that can’t be described. That man did something that most of us would never do, and he didn’t have to do it. He came back just for this event, and did that. Oh gosh I need a moment to put that match into perspective. Shane man… Thank you! Hopefully he is not injured and that was just a stretcher job to accent the story. That is pro wrestling.

Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Lot’s of people come out at once, then Mark Henry, Kane, DDP, and Shaq (who comes out to Panda which is a bad bad song)

• Shaq has a stare down with Big Show, Kane goes to chokeslam both of them. They chokeslam Kane back. Fandango does a New Day hip gyration and then every guy goes in one at a time and faces both big men. Big Show and Shaq have a stare down again and do the choking thing again.. This is gonna get Shaq into the Hall of Fame…
• All the other people sneak in and try to throw both over the top rope. The whole field tossed the two biggest guys out.
• My wife asked me if Baron Corbin always will have a sad stomach. I asked what she meant by that and she said “his stomach always looks like it’s sad, like it’s so saggy it’s a person frowning” I didn’t know how to respond, at the same time I don’t disagree.
• Tatanka is in the ring and he didn’t even get an entrance!! The commentators didn’t notice until Byron pointed it out.
• DDP hit a few Diamond Cutters then got beat up while he was showboating.
• There is a giant picture of Andre on one of the screens that when in certain camera angles looks like  Andre is watching the match from up above.
• Tatanka was trying to eliminate Adam Rose but Baron Corbin heard that Tatanka as still wrestling on the indies and decided to throw him out.
• Swagger got thrown out too. Curtis Axel is wearing cargo pants and normal boots… Which means he lost his gear? He didn’t choose that gear I think because they are like actual pants.. John Cena style..
• The Social Outcasts are now working together and eliminate people. Mid-match they do the Bo train. and Bo leads everyone into Baron Corbin and Kane. Curtis Axel and Adam Rose are eliminated. Slater jumps into Henry’s arms and is throwin over the top rope.
• Henry lifts Breeze over the top of his head and Tyler is gone. After every elimination the crowd boo’s. Baron Corbin throws Kane over and Baron wins the Battle Royal…

And I’m Like… That’s a way to arrive on the scene. The whole arena chants NXT at Baron. That is pretty cool. That was a fun match to cool us down in between the main events. I can’t believe Sandow hasn’t been on TV in maybe half a year, he still got the biggest reaction of the match.

The Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders come out to ACDC’s Thunderstruck inA something that confuses me… I don’t get that at all. They do a kick line too…. cool? Then The Rock comes out… makes sense.

He looks sweaty as hell and points to his arm to let us know he has goosebumps. He tells us to wait one minute? Ugh, why is he so sweaty? Was he doing a Dallas Cowboy cheerleader routine in the back with them? Then he brings out a T-Shirt gun? Nope its a flame thrower. The stage hands quick put something up that says Rock. Wow..?

Rock sees his name and looks at us, he decides to light his name on fire….? As his name is on fire he holds his gun up again then walks to the ring without it. He shows his bicep to one of the cheerleaders and I realized something… The Rock is America. He is flamethrowers and cheerleaders for no reason. He isn’t America, he is the idea of America. Success through hardwork and then ridiculously loved and ridiculous actions. Like why would the Rock have a flamethrower and Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders? Because he needed an entrance.. I shoulda pee’d during this.

Matter of fact, I am going out for a cigarette.. I will probably miss some crowd blowing and catchphrases.

Ok .. I am back.. The crowd is like 101,000 and it broke a record. I came back in as the Wyatt’s interrupted the Rock. Erick Rowan has a new mask with horns. Wyatt says he chose The Rock because he is success, The Great One, The People’s Champion. Wyatt calls him a liar. He is wearing a butcher smock and says this isn’t The Rock’s moment or the fans moment. Bray calls him Mr. Rock. lol

Bray says he will eviscerate the Rock and make us watch. I get to watch Bray, you don’t have to make me. Rock talks about how WrestleMania Rock and Rockettes babies are getting made tonight. Rock starts belittling Bray Wyatt. UGH!! Rock says Wyatt sounds like he has been hitting the bong… I am glad I missed a few minutes of this. I just want to see the last match or The Wyatts kick ass. Now Rock turns it around and puts Bray over, says he has the ability and charisma. The crowd starts cheering loudly for that. He keeps building Rock up, and the crowd keeps clapping, then the other foot drops. Rock says “you say your the eater of worlds, where The Rock is standing you are the eater of hot pockets” Bray said he came to kick the door down. Wyatt says “you have no idea who you are fooling with friend.” Rock takes his shirt off and the females cheer. Rock told Bray he wants a referee because we are gonna have a match. He called Wyatt’s inbred Duck Dynasty bitches.

The Rock vs. Bray Wyatt Erick Rowan

• That is cool.. Erick Rowan gets a singles match at WrestleMania… Rowan got Rock Bottomed… The Rock won in six seconds…
• The Rock set another Record…

And I’m Like… eye roll emoji.

The Wyatt’s surround the Rock and Cena comes out… The Crowd “John Cena sucks” Rock acts like he is coked up and ready to go. Cena looks laid back and his neck looks way skinny. Cena and Rock beat on Braun Strowman and do their respective knuckle shuffles and people’s elbows. I am getting Wrestlemania 8 flashbacks with Warrior and Hogan.

And I’m Like… yup.

WWE World Heavyweight Championship

Triple H (c) vs. Roman Reigns

The video package starts with Roman saying quotes straight out of a self help book. He talks about how you can achieve your dreams ,what ever they are. Also that he never took a hand out. We see shots of crowd signs saying “‘They’ don’t want you to win” Then we see HHH throwing Roman over the top rope at Rumble to become champion. HHH says he is the man around here and The Authority always wins. This video package really makes it seem like HHH is gonna lose.

• Triple H’s entrance is all skulls and guys in skulls holding titles. Steph is dressed like she wants to turn back time .
• HHH comes out and he isn’t in any gear like his old entrances. He is flanked by Stephanie McMahon and a bunch of skulled individuals. When HHH’s music ends he looks at Steph and mouths “I love you” then they kiss then Roman’s music plays.
• Roman’s music is loud but the boo’s are louder. Roman punches the large video screen and it turns into the words Roman Empire. There are fireworks, like the ones Charlotte got when she won. That makes me lean on HHH winning, because why waste all those fireworks.
• Roman is getting boo’d hard… this is very interesting.
• Reigns got thrown over the top rope by HHH and the crowd cheers. Roman gets back in the ring and we hear “Roman Sucks”
• This match is legit, every move HHH does the crowd cheers, any move Roman does the crowd boo’s.
• HHH took his time to show that he punched Roman in his reconstructed nose. Roman is gaining momentum and the boo’s get louder.
• As the two brawl outside we see a Raw Replay of HHH pounding Roman’s head into the announce table and throwing Roman over the top of the table.
• They get back in the ring after HHH hit a swinging neckbreaker off the table and onto the floor. HHH does some top and middle rope attacks and Roman is able to fight back with forearms and Samoan Drops.
• HHH was able to take Roman to the outside and threw him over the announce table.. As HHH was walking away Roman chased after and speared Triple H through a barricade. Stephanie is telling the referee that they are both out of the ring so he should count. Steph knows the title only changes on pin or submission so Roman has to carry HHH into the ring. After he brought HHH in the ring he laid down. HHH was stirring, and Roman has like a hernia problem or something.
• Steph is talking shit to Roman as the crowd chants “Nakamura”
• HHH is going for a reverse armbar and starts doing joint manipulation. Reigns can’t fight out of it and HHH looks like he is gonna break Romans arm.. It is kind of disturbing looking. Roman is fighting out of it as the crowd boo’s.
• Roman is able to get to his feet but HHH will not let go as his wife yells “BREAK HIS ARM!!”
• Roman is able to fight out of it and HHH locks in the pedigree a bit later. Roman backdrops HHH over the top rope as the crowd chants “Ole”
• We get a Sami Zayn and a Nakamura chant, the best match from Friday was “Zayn vs. Nakamura” I wonder if that was the best match for the weekend.
• One of the bigger pops of the night was Roman spearing Stephanie. HHH hit a pedigree and Roman kicked out… The crowd cheers at first but it sustains a bit before turning to boo’s.
• I hear a Bayley chant now the one that goes “I knooow you wanna be my girl”
• Reigns hits a Superman punch and starts doing that weird head shaking thing where he builds to his Spear. HHH hit a jumping knee! For Two!
• I sense tomorrow’s Raw will get  many-a -NXT chants.
• Stephanie grabs the sledgehammer and gives it to HHH. Rumor was that this was NoDQ, now we no it is DQ.
• HHH attempts the Sledgehammer and we get some more boo’s.
• HHH hits a Spear and wins …. Te crowd cheers but there is more boo’s than anything…
• Well now it is more cheers. Cole says ” The Renaissance of The Roman Empire”…

And I’m Like… For those of you that are happy Roman is champion, good for you, and congrats on your guy winning. I am not too pleased with the result. There is a graphic letting us know Roman will be on The Today show as champion… This has to be a send half the crowd home happy, half the crowd is upset. I am afraid for Roman at Raw tomorrow night.

Overall there were memories. It’s been said that Mania is for the casual fans and kids, SummerSlam is for the hardcore fans. That may be true. I am not sure where this Mania ranks with other Mania’s. I know that I am not going to be thinking or talking about it with much excitement tomorrow. Am I glad to have witnessed it ? Yes! The Shane vs. Undertaker had the most memorable moment. I think the Woman’s match was the best match of the night but was hindered by the finish. Well that is another one in the books. Now we look onward to Wrestlemania 33 in Orlando.

Please Share and Like and Tweet and stuff. It’s appreciated.

Have a good one, Happy WrestleMania

-Jake

http://www.cheap-heat.com/and-im-like-reviewing-raw-march-29th-2016/ http://www.cheap-heat.com/and-im-like-reviewing-raw-march-29th-2016/#respond Wed, 30 Mar 2016 01:23:56 +0000 Jake Drury Blogs Other Blogs Adam Rose AJ Styles Alberto Del Rio Alicia Fox and I'm like Becky Lynch Big E Big Show Bo Dallas Brie Bella Brock Lesnar Byron Saxton Charlotte Chris Jericho Curtis Axel Dean Ambrose Dolph Ziggler Emma Eva Marie Heath Slater JBL Jonathon Coachmen Kalisto Kane Kevin Owens Kofi Kingston Konnor Lana League of Nations Mark Henry Michael Cole Monday Night Raw Review Naomi Natalya New Day Paige Paul Heyman Raw Results 3/28/2016 Renee Young Ric Flair Roman Reigns Rusev Ryback Sami Zayn Sasha Banks Shane McMahon Sheamus Sin Cara Snoop Dogg Social Outcasts Stardust Stephanie McMahon SummerRae Tamina The Ascension The Dudleyz The Miz Triple H Undertaker Viktor Vince McMahon Wade Barrett Zack Ryder http://www.cheap-heat.com/?p=16173 We are one week away from WrestleMania! It’s what I consider THE ONLY holiday for me, which doesn’t mean I am always excited for the lead up. It’s just the only thing I know the date of and look forward to. I’ll talk some personal stuff in italics then we will get Raw. I was […]

We are one week away from WrestleMania! It’s what I consider THE ONLY holiday for me, which doesn’t mean I am always excited for the lead up. It’s just the only thing I know the date of and look forward to. I’ll talk some personal stuff in italics then we will get Raw.

I was at work today, like I am everyday, and we had some regulars come into the restaurant around closing time. They were “Grandpa and Grandma” we don’t know their real names but they call told us to call them that. Grandpa and Grandma have 7 children, 21 grandchildren, and 72 great-grandchildren. I believe there is a great-great-grandchild too. They are 88 and 90 years old and have been married 68 years. I like to chat with them as much as I can. Today we were talking about life lessons they have learned. They said things about being old makes you wise because of experience. They talk about how in love with the country the citizens were after World War II. Talk about the sacrifices you have to make in life and the tragedies one can go through. They were never well off, how could they be with 7 kids!?! Grandpa made ninety cents an hour when he started and by his retirement he was up to $13 an hour. They are two of the happiest people I have come across and when I asked why, they said “You need to go through depressions (the great depression) and hardship to truly appreciate what you have.” Grandpa then said “my father was born in 1890 and came to Minnesota in his teens. The first place he lived was a hole in a hill. They did that for a year until they could afford wood to build a house. My father always cherished houses and shelter.” That blew my mind, to live in a hole in a hill! I feel like with wrestling, a lot of people are in their hole in a hill homes. The wrestlers struggle everyday to make it to the main roster, the fans struggle through daily life and dreadful storylines to get to the wrestling that brings emotion, wrestling as a whole is not respected in mainstream community, so when there is some recognition, we cherish it like we would a house on a hill. I know the build to Mania has been subpar, but let’s hope this episode will provide some wood to build our shelter.

Monday Night Raw

Undertaker Promo

• Cole welcomes us to Raw and we hear the ominous gong of the Undertaker.
• Five minutes later he gets in the ring and starts talking. I wonder if you had a race with dial up internet opening the home page and Undertakers entrance, what would finish first?
• Undertaker says this won’t be his last WrestleMania. Shane’s blood is on the hands of Vince, but Vince’s blood will be on the hands of the Undertakers.
• I think I am gonna do Wrestlemania predictions in this write-up. Those will be in the And I’m Like… parts.
• Undertaker spent a bit too much time in Death Valley and got quite a sunburn.

Shane McMahon Promo

• Shane McMahon cuts his promo like a memorized script. His delivery is alright but it’s pretty obvious. I think the more scripted the show is, the more like theater it seems.
• Shane is saying he is a savior, but we don’t know what his motives are outside of gaining control and changing things. He could change things for the worse. He is anti-establishment. He is Sanders and Trump while The Authority is Washington D.C.
• Shane said something about Undertakers legacy and Taker told him to “shut your mouth rich boy”
• Shane sells confidence and fear in one look. It’s those puppy dog eyes.
• Shane says “let me bring you back to WrestleMania two years ago.. Your legacy died”
• Undertaker says that since Shane was born he was his daddy’s bitch. Shane threw fists.
• Undertaker threw Shane over the top rope to a pop from the crowd. Undertaker is introducing Shane to the woodshed.
• The announce table is cleared off. Wrestling is the only form of anything where you clear off a table before you put someone through it.
• Undertaker tries to Last Ride Shane through the table, Shane moves out of the way and Shane hits Taker with a tv monitor.
• Shane hit him twice and looked to jump off the top turnbuckle and put Taker through a table.
• I remember seeing Shane do this at Summerslam vs. Test. I was there live but too young to appreciate it.
• Shane does his Leap of Faith and connects. Taker is laid out “you still got it ” from the crowd. Yep he still can jump off stuff!
• Undertaker sat up though, and looked pissed. That means he is not going through that announce table Sunday.

And I’m Like… I really think Shane is winning. If Undertaker loses, he “won’t wrestle at WrestleMania” even though if Shane wins, he is in control and can reverse that. Also, Undertaker laid out the fact that Vince’s blood is on Takers hands. Which means Vince is getting involved. Maybe he will sacrifice himself for Shane or something. It will be more spectacle than anything but Undertaker is known to thread quite a damn story together. That segment blew the Leap of Faith load so it will be interesting to see how they do a call back to it in the match. I liked the segment a lot.

Chris Jericho vs. Zack Ryder

• Jericho told Zack backstage that he doesn’t have what it takes to be a champ . Jericho is quite the historian.
• AJ Styles music hits and he comes out in his gear but with a hat… Weird. He isn’t from around here I take it. In WWE you wear a shirt and no pants. Not no shirt and pants… and a ball cap? You are different AJ!!
• AJ said he isn’t leaving tonight until he gets his Mania match.
• Bell rings and Ryder goes for a roll up. Jericho is dominating right away.
• Love the aesthetic of the table staying broken. It gives the illusion of chaos!
• Jericho is working over Ryder while telling AJ off… Poor Ryder.
• As the commentators argue over AJ Styles.. Ryder tries to hit the Broski boot but misses. Ryder ends up getting the roll-up on a distracted Jericho.
• AJ does the “Y2Jackass” taunt because that is what their feud is based on. Taunting different chants on someones name for weeks. Jericho is now freaking out like this was WCW and he had conspiracy theories.
• Jericho grabs the mic, calls Styles “a stupid idiot that kicked the hornets nest and is now gonna regret it” Jericho says the match is on at Mania.

And I’m Like… This is a feud to get AJ over. He is beating Jericho in probably a great match. This is probably what was supposed to happen with Fandango. Beat Jericho at Mania and become a top tier threat that isn’t quite WWE Championship material but good for wrestling feuds. AJ is a solid hand, he is a lot like your Jimmy Snuka’s and Paul Orndorff’s.

Sasha is sitting at ringside and looks pretty emotional but is holding it in.

Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte w/ Ric Flair

• We see that Sasha beat Charlotte on Smackdown! and Becky attacked her. Now Charlotte is facing Becky.
• I think if Becky wins this, Charlotte gets the win at Mania. I honestly don’t know where they are planning on going with the Diva’s title. It’s probably the most interested I have been in the Diva’s title in quite some time. It’s crazy how these three girls weren’t even on the Main Roster last year during this time.
• Cole reminds us that these two wrestled at Royal Rumble and Becky almost won until Ric got involved.
• The match starts and the crowd is all “we want Sasha” which makes sense because Brooklyn is where this happened .
• I wonder what Sasha is thinking during this match. Is she paying attention to what moves get what reaction? Is she planning on her Mania match? Is she watching as a fan? Planning something else?
• Becky seems to be answering everything Charlotte does. Charlotte goes to the outside and is distracted by Sasha. Becky chases Charlotte around the ring and Ric grabs Becky’s leg. Becky runs into a boot and Natural Selection and Charlotte wins.

And I’m Like… For real I don’t know what is gonna happen. Sasha beat Charlotte and Charlotte beat Becky. That should mean Becky gets the duke on Sunday, but that doesn’t feel right. I think Bex is the odd one out in this scenario, unless the feud is triple threat for a few months. The match tonight only added uncertainty to next week, and having Sasha not talk made her thought process more interesting.

Renee Young interviews Vince McMahon

Renee asks if McMahon was surprised by Undertaker and Shane. Vince says Shane will do anything to win this match. Vince says Shane doesn’t want Undertakers yard, he wants the nation of the WWE Universe. Vince tells Shane to be halfway across the Brooklyn Bridge. Shane shows up and talks about how narcissistic Vince is. He says he will take 40 years of hostitlity. He will control Monday Night Raw. Shane said that Vince stole the company from Vince J. and Sunday Shane is taking it from Vince.

And I’m Like… Shane should have said earn it. Taking and stealing is the same thing.

The Social Outcasts are on the apron and Curtis tells his dad Mr. Perfect, happy birthday. That’s because Axel is melting hearts.

K ane and Big Show vs. Curtis Axel and Bo Dallas

• Kane and Curtis start the match and the Outcasts attack real quickly. We get all the people in the Battle Royal .
• People are all attacking each other. The last three in the ring are Henry, Kane, and Big Show. Kane and Show chokeslam Mark Henry.
• The Outcasts get slammed by Show and Kane and yep.

And I’m Like… We had the Swiss Superman win and the World’s Largest Athlete win. I am not sure who is even in the match, I will say it’s an NXT guy or Mark Henry. Because Mark has always been a Battle Royal threat and never has won one.

The Authority Promo

• Steph proudly shows off her husband HHH. She said to stand up to praise HHH and tells us to get on our knees to H as well. (insert dirty joke)
• HHH puts over the belt and talks about how everyone dreams to be champion, he talks about in six days we will wach Mania. He repeats himself like 7 times per statement. That must hammer the facts into our head, or at least he thinks so.
• HHH said we don’t have the ability to make our dreams a reality. He is right, many people don’t chase the dreams. Fear of failure leads to fountain of excuses.
• Triple H said this will be his 20th WrestleMania. That is one of the best right there folks.
• HHH says since day one he was obsessed with being the most successful WWE Superstar in history. He talks about how his obsession led him to many championships. He will be in control of the history soon once Vince leaves. HE will rewrite history to make him and Flair the greatest. The best thing about it is that HHH loves wrestling history, so I think NWA will get more recognition the more time goes by.
• Triple H said he wasn’t obsessed anymore and was fine being a corporate suit. He said Roman re-lit that fire when he attacked HHH.
• Triple H then said “Roman must have balls to put my name in his mouth or put his hands on me” (insert second dirty joke here)
• HOLY SHIT!! Has anyone called him Bro-man Reigns? He is such a bro, his drinking beers and having best buds and being the coolest dude. He is that bro that isn’t douchey but seems like he is too cool for your party… Maybe I am just saying that to get Broman Reigns a thing.
• Broman comes out and gets stomped by HHH.
• Triple H rolled out of the ring and retreated. Steph was caught in the ring with Reigns and hightailed it as well, with H’s belt in hand.
• The crowd pops huge and I believe does “Roman Sucks” chants.. maybe not, it sure sounded like it though.

And I’m Like… Triple H has to win. That will make more people cheer Roman I believe or vindicate Roman for his heel turn. Part of me is thinking HHH is champion until Seth wins it at Summerslam… I don’t know, they must have a plan for after Mania and HHH’s Twitter says he is training hard for more than one day. That segment didn’t make me care about the match either way. I feel like this is a turning point for something, I just don’t know what. Having Shane run Raw and HHH be champion seems like too good of a storyline to pass up

Kofi Kingston vs. Alberto Del Rio

• New Day start a new Booty-O’s chant that goes ” Booty, Booty, Booty-o’s”
• The crowd is cheering hard for New Day. “New Day Rocks” and “Booty-O’s”
• Big E quotes Phife Dawg with a “Can I Kick It” and the crowd gloriously chants “Yes You Can”
• Is it sad that when I know Del Rio is gonna wrestle I feel bored before it starts?
• Xavier does a wonderful throw back to Roddy Piper and plays La Cucaracha to Del Rio.
• Alberto legit is dominating but I kinda black out when he wrestles. I know he did moves to prove dominance but I don’t remember any thing that happened until Del Rio missed his stomp.
• Del Rio hit a backstabber that really showed Sasha does it best.
• Kofi then hit a double stomp counter and got two and a half. It was so close, Xavier was shocked at how good the move was.
• Del Rio blocked Kofi’s through the ropes face kick and hit a double stomp. New Day distracted him and Del Rio put up the fist to signal his cross armbreaker.
• Kofi won with a roll-up.

And I’m Like… The best thing about New Day at Mania will be their entrance. They deserve to get better treatment or a better match. They are working with former world champions and stuff but I don’t know. It seems like a lay up win for New Day and if they lose it will make the Internet mad… New Day needs unicorns for their Mania moment.

Jonathon Coachman show up and gets a nice pop. Coach announces that New Day is his favorite to interview and that Sportscenter will have live coverage of WrestleMania.

That is a pretty big achievement, good for WWE. One step closer to building that home on the hill of mainstream.

Also Warrior Award goes to Joan Lunden who beat cancer.

Renee Young interviews Roman Reigns but Bubba Dudley calls out Roman to finish what they started on Smackdown. D-Von shows up and keeps egging Roman on. Reigns lands some punches and then HHH jumps him from behind. D-Von does a beautiful line from Rocky “you ain’t so bad, you aint so bad”

Triple H holds the belt up to Roman’s face like Shawn Michaels did to Stone Cold before Mania 14. Ugh that makes me think Roman is winning.

Kalisto vs. Konnor

• I don’t know who is excited for this match. I am sure a few years from now it won’t matter and we will remember Kalisto vs. Ryback as the United States match and thats it.
• Kalisto is against Konnor… I wonder who will win.
• Kalisto is just doing his greatest hits. He does all his signature moves and hits SDS for the finish.
• Kalisto quickly takes out Viktor and Ryback comes out. The crowd chants “Goldberg”

And I’m Like… Ryback is Del Rio to me. They are like Einhorn and Finkle except it’s not a man and a woman, it’s an American and a Mexican. They are competent wrestlers, but they ooze mediocrity sometimes.

Brock Lesnar Promo

• Paul Heyman does his typical spiel of who he is and how bad-ass Brock Lesnar is.
• He tells us his job tonight was to hype us for WrestleMania.
• Heyman says “one lunatic thinks he can take the fight to Brock Lesnar”
• Paul says Ambrose is smarter than we think. He is “crazy like a fox”
• Heyman says weapon, then asks if it is politically correct. Then he says well it is a weapon and the crowd pops and Lesnar looks at Paul who returns a look of “oh yeah we shouldn’t have done that but we are rolling with it.”
• Heyman says “Dr. Brock Lesnar will take those politically incorrect weapons” and Brock looks back at him with that same look from earlier.
• Ambrose comes out with a little red wagon…..
• The comentators say they don’t get it at all. Ambrose has a forced angry look on his face.
• He takes a crowbar and some steel pipes from under the ring. Then there is a baseball bat with barbed wire. Heyman is selling surprise, bewilderment, and fear. Ambrose grabs a fire extinguisher, a chainsaw, and some stairs. He doesn’t acknowledge Lesnar and he walks right back out of the arena…. The wagon is a lot heavier and Dean is struggling.

And I’m Like… That segment was beautiful… It shows how Brock is same ol’ same ol’. It shows how Ambrose is planning on sending a message at Mania about Hardcore. Ambrose doing that will get a reaction from the crowd when he comes out with his wagon on Sunday. We will remember the weapons in there and start getting excited for what is to come. I am not sure who will win this. I think Ambrose is gonna lose after a very very hard fought battle, that’s the only thing I can think of that makes sense to me.

Paige w/ Team Total Diva vs. Emma w/ Team B.A.D. and Blonde

• These are girls thrown together so we can do a multi-diva’s match. It’s weird that a spot on Mania isn’t earned anymore it’s given.
• Emma and Paige are who started the Diva’s Revolution in NXT. It’s fitting that they are on the go home show before the NXT girls fight for the Diva’s title at Mania.
• I miss Dana Brooke with Emma out here.
• For those that don’t watch NXT, what do they think of Emma. Is it just like… Wasn’t she with Santino? Why is she bad now.
• The crowd is faintly battling it out with “boring/NXT” back and forth… weird.
• Emma and Paige are wrestling as well as they could, but this crowd is not receptive… so the match suffers because of it.
• Lana jumps in the ring as the ref is distracted and Emma and hit some moves to win.
• There is a horrible post match fight where no one does their finishers and everyone just cat fights. The Diva’s are getting beat up by Bad and Blonde and then Eva Marie comes out for the save?
• Yep, Eva Marie saved the Total Diva’s

And I’m Like… Poor girls, if this was a two month story with build it would have emotion and stuff. Eva did a heroes return when she was never a hero… This match won’t be the best.. maybe Snoop Dogg can come out like during the Diva Battle Royal of years past. Who knows.

Goldust is in the back singing Joy and Pain by Rob Base and DJ Easy Rock.

R-Truth calls him Goldizzle. Truth tells him he can’t have Goldust’s back in the Andre Battle Royal. Truth asked to do the thinking for Goldust. Truth and Goldust broke up and Truth blew his nose in Goldust’s shirt. He said “you think it’s funny, but it’s snot” and yeah…

Snoop Dogg is the new Hall of Famer… So yeah that Total Diva’s match? He will totally be there.

That is a weird Hall of Fame class.

Dolph Ziggler, Sami Zayn and Sin Cara vs. Kevin Owens, The Miz and Stardust

• Poor Zack Ryder, he was the one guy who is in the ladder match for the IC belt and wasn’t in this match. He did beat Jericho though…
• The “Ole” chants from the crowd were LOUD!!!
• Owens begs Miz to tag in and the crowd ERUPTS then KO tags Stardust to boo’s from the crowd. Because Owens knows how to be a heel.
• Ziggler has brown hair and wrestles in a shirt… What has 2016 done to Ziggler?
• “Cody” chants from the crowd in a droning type voice.
• This match is really hard to follow, not because it is crazy but because there isn’t much of a story and the commentators are going off on tangents like. “Stardust was IC champion in another world”
• JBL said it was too bad Byron didn’t drown when the crowd did the wave. “Byron Saxton” chants from the crowd.
• Owens won’t tag in and Stardust tags Miz in. Owens tries to start a Miz chant.
• “CM Punk” from the crowd… Ugh, that’s how you know a crowd is full of themselves. Like that one day after Mania Raw crowd who chanted “we are awesome”
• The crowd chants “Cody” again, Stardust sells it like it is bothering him. Stardust can’t hit a suplex because Sami reversed it. The crowd didn’t cheer…. Like if you are chanting Cody to distract him and it works, once a move is done to the distracted guy, you should cheer right?
• Stardust spanked Ziggler?!?!
• The match is planned to keep Owens and Zayn apart and that is good. They did the tease in the beginning. Stardust is selling his crazyness too. Owens tags Stardust in even though Stardust wrestled most of the match. Owens chants for Stardust who buys it and cheers with him.
• The crowd chants “This is Booty” ok .That is a good one.
• Ziggler is doing a babyfaced comeback but the crowd is acting like a blind person at an art museum.
• Sami dove and took Owens out. Sin Cara does some flippy moves but Stardust caught him when Stardust put his knees up.
• Miz tags in and Sami gets another hot tag. The crowd is waiting for the match to end.
• Zayn gets a near fall but then caught with Miz’ Skull Crushing Finale, then we get finisher craziness.
• Owens is the only one standing on the apron. He tags himself in as Sami is incapacitated. Owens yells at Sami and says “your nothing” Sami reverses the Pop up Powerbomb.
• Owens goes to tag in but Stardust and Miz walk away. Owens even yells CODY at Stardust.
• Owens turns around and Zayn is waiting. Zayn hits a tornado DDT and a Helluva Kick for the win. WHY!?!?! Why have those two finish!!!?!?

And I’m Like… That was a match that the crowd wasn’t into and had a story but was only about Kevin Owens. To have Zayn and Owens face off and have a finish kind of confused me. You can build these multi-man matches without having them touch but they did. When they go one-on-one it will get hype.. but still. Owens will win, to prove he is a champion worth beating.

T he Authority Promo

• Steph preaches the truth about how we all have hopes and dreams that won’t come true. She says reality wakes us up with a hard slap every morning. PREACH SISTER!! I don’t like that the are saying things that hit home to me, but since it is bathed in the truth I can’t help but respect them. As an on screen and off screen couple and people overall. I respect the hell out of those two. I know Roman Reigns has worked hard to get where he is.. but I personally do not know how to get behind his character. I don’t know enough about Roman to make a personal opinion, but overall I am on Team Authority.
• Roman interfered again and we are brawling again.
• The Lads come out, thats what The League of Nations call themselves. Stardust, Miz and Dudley Boyz are all out here to help HHH take out Reigns.
• Shane is so winning and then HHH will have his team feud with Shane and his team right? Ok I am getting pretty excited for Mania!
• Uso’s and other good guys come out to help.
• As HHH is walking to the back he tries to fight Roman again, he is held back and then Roman dives over the top rope and takes out tons of guys. HHH walks to the ramp and he holds the belt up as Roman’s music plays.

And I’m Like… So HHH is gonna use the sledgehammer after a ref bump and Roman is kicking out, or HHH gets the pin, but I am certain the finish won’t happen until Sledgehammer is introduced. It’s weird to not see it in the feud yet. I am pretty excited for half the card. I don’t want to fantasy book too much because then I tend to get disappointed. Let’s see where the road takes us. I think WWE gave me some wood to build this house with. Let’s see how it looks after WrestleMania.

Thank you for the read, please share or tweet, or comment! I appreciate it!

Thanks again and have a good one.

-Jake

http://www.cheap-heat.com/and-im-like-reviewing-raw-february-29th-2016/ http://www.cheap-heat.com/and-im-like-reviewing-raw-february-29th-2016/#respond Tue, 01 Mar 2016 05:44:41 +0000 Jake Drury Blogs Other Blogs 2/29/2015 Adam Rose AJ Styles Alberto Del Rio and I'm like Becky Lynch Big E Big Show Bo Dallas Bray Wyatt Brie Bella Byron Saxton Charlotte Chris Jericho Curtis Axel Dean Ambrose Dolph Ziggler February 2016 Goldust Heath Slater JBL Kalisto Kevin Owens King Barrett Kofi Kingston Michael Cole Monday Night RAW Naomi New Day R-Truth Raw Results Raw review Ric Flair Roman Reigns Rusev Ryback Sasha Banks Shane McMahon Sheamus Sin Cara Stephanie McMahon Tamina The Dudley Boyz The Miz The Usos Triple H Undertaker Wyatt Family Xavier Woods http://www.cheap-heat.com/?p=15979 This week has been weird. The apartment complex I live at was just sold and our new landlords have new rules. On top of that our caretaker was given a 30-day notice. It feels weird living life one way yesterday, and having to change your lifestyle and routine because someone else made new rules. It’s […]

This week has been weird. The apartment complex I live at was just sold and our new landlords have new rules. On top of that our caretaker was given a 30-day notice. It feels weird living life one way yesterday, and having to change your lifestyle and routine because someone else made new rules. It’s kind of somber round these parts so let’s get submersed into some wrestling!

Monday Night Raw Beginning

• We get a video package of HHH destroying Roman Reigns face to cheers from the crowd.
• Triple H finally got vindication from the spear he was hit with at TLC, now Roman wants retribution I am sure.
• The intro song plays… “press X to reload” lolol

HHH comes down to cut a promo

• HHH does what he did on Smackdown and show us post-op photos of Roman Reigns.
• Then HHH says we all have an authority figure that we need to listen to. Well isn’t that poignant, did you buy the apartments Hunter?
• I am a boss for a few employee’s and granted I am a dick sometimes, I am not the type of authoritative figure HHH says. Fear is what keeps things in place says HHH. That is why even if we hate our authority figures we don’t do anything about it.
• Hunter says Roman chose to disrespect Authority and then he looks around and waits for a good 30 seconds until a weak “Roman” chant breaks out.

Dean Ambrose comes out

• Cole asks if Ambrose forgot that he got thrown through a windshield, drove an ambulance back to the arena and got F-5’d? I am sure he remembers Cole but that is a nice way to recap.
• Pretty big “Ambrose” chant. Ambrose milks it for a bit too. Dean says he just got off the phone with Roman and he wants Dean to tell HHH that he is coming for him.
• Dean also has a very red nose…
• HHH says Dean won an Oscar for best supporting actor in a bromance. I liked the supporting actor line.
• Ambrose then goes down the whole Raw Recap of last week. Dean points out the four matches we have planned for Mania. “Shane-O-Mac” chants from the crowd and Ambrose asks HHH if he likes Shane McMahon.
• Ambrose asks Hunter the question “who did you not want to win at Fastlane” Hunter said the only people that meant anything in it was Brock and Roman.
• Dean and his red assed nose gets right on HHH’s lawn saying he was the last guy Hunter wanted to face at WrestleMania.
• Dean says HHH is smart enough to know that he doesn’t wanna face a guy like Ambrose and the crowd starts chanting “Ambrose”. His star is getting even brighter you guys.
• The cadence with these two makes this promo seem like an actual conversation. It is weird, I am not used to this type of wrestling conversation.
• Ambrose challenges HHH for the belt before Mania. He said Roman won a match to fight the champ at Mania, but HHH doesn’t have to be that champion.
• HHH looks skinnier than normal, maybe while he wasn’t on TV he was working out like crazy for Mania, I have a feeling he is gonna put on an amazing match. With the pressure of carrying some of the show and all.
• HHH made Ambrose vs. Del Rio in a match for later, then he will answer the title match question.

And I’m Like… That was what it was. It got Dean over a bit more, made HHH assert power. It set up a match and angle that at the moment doesn’t really matter. The fun thing was the way those two interacted. I was watching it, wondering if they had a script or not because that seemed very fluid, outside of waiting for crowd reactions.

Number One Contender Match

Becky Lynch vs. Sasha Banks

• Sunday was my birthday and I got a Sasha Banks shirt.. Feels good to finally have it. Now I just need those rings and shades and I’ll be set.
• I kinda want it to be a triple threat so I am hoping this finish is not decisive. That makes me wonder if I will enjoy it even if the finish doesn’t make sense as long as it sets up a triple threat. or Sasha can win.
• The match starts and Sasha applies a headlock and Becky almost reversed that into a disarmer. We have a split crowd “woman and children say Becky” “bassy men say Sasha”
• They are wrestling at a fast pace making me think this match won’t go for that long. They keep wrestling to a stalemate to show they are equals though.
• The girls trade baseball slides but before we go to commercial Sasha is in control.
• When we come back Sasha hits that jumping double knee into a pin that she has been doing lately and got a two.
• Becky hit an exploder suplex for two. Both girls hit one of their signatures for two.
• Each girl knows the camera game too, they show the facial expressions to accent the match but they face the ramp so the camera can catch the WrestleMania sign in the background.
• Thi pace has not slowed down and there are still flash pins and hard attacks. These girls are really going at it.
• The story is they are almost exact equals and know each other so well. That means it should lead to a finish where one gets a lucky move for the win to keep them as equals.
• Both ladies look tired and they are climbing to the top rope and fighting on top. Sasha does a sunsetflip powerbomb pin. Sasha is flat on her back and Becky is laying on Sasha but Lynch’s shoulders were down. It is a double pin and a draw.

And I’m Like… We saw this with Zayn/Joe and we saw it now. I like it. I think I like it because of what I want the Mania match to be. The crowd chants “triple threat” there isn’t much of a reaction, more confusion. I like it though, now all we need is some emotion in this triple threat story and we are good. These girls will steal the show and I am so excited for this match at Mania. You go girls, prove to the world what you proved to the NXT Universe

Bray Wyatt is backstage with the Wyatt’s. Bray describes the definition of insanity by doing the same thing over and over again with the same result. Like attacking someone, starting a storyline, losing the big match. Trying it again and again. Maybe not. Bray delivers his promo’s and is so captivating because he expresses so much sadness, despair, and at the same time joy and chaos in his eyes. He is a special performer that is hankered down by not having a real impact on the WWE narrative.

Dolph Ziggler vs. The Miz

• I have no cares about this match.
• As I was thinking about what to write this match lasted a minute or two with Miz getting a flash pin on Ziggler.

And I’m Like… Let’s look to Smackdown where Ziggler will get a  to continue the feud. Just let these two tag against Jericho and AJ Styles.

Stephanie McMahon Promo

• She has her hair done, has her trophy in the ring, and is carrying a clipboard because “nobody do her like she do her”
• Steph is trying to finish her acceptance speech. Her and her swoll ass arms. I bet if I worked out for a year I couldn’t get those kinda muscles.
• Steph says “keep chanting Shane-O-Mac is not here tonight”
• She starts her speech but is getting emotional. It feels bad to see people boo her. She is just a human trying to fulfill her families legacy. Honestly that is daunting. She will be the fourth or fifth generation to run the company. To fill Vincent K.’s shoes is such a task.
• Steph tells us that she has worked so hard us and put family time behind work. She has every right to be pissed at her brother.
• Shane, that was kind of a dick move, let them run the company because you don’t want to, then demanding it back. We need a brand war. Steph can showS Shane how to run a company.
• Steph points out the honesty, Shane hasn’t been to many or any WWE events since he left. He doesn’t care about the family legacy, he cares about Shane’s.

And I’m Like… I know its Shane vs. Undertaker, but there is no reason to choose one over the other. On the McMahon sibling rivalry though? I am all in the Steph camp!! Love that Shane shows up and emotional truth based stories start up easily.

League of Nations vs. Lucha Dragons

• Rusev and Sheamus are wrestling for LoN.
• Dragons have some sweet black and silver gear.
• I am not sure that this match matters. We hear that Rusev has a Maserati  and hear “we want Lana” chants… I don’t think we do, I think we just want to chant something during a rest hold.
• Rusev gets the referee’s attention, tags Sheamus, then tells everyone he made the tag by clapping over his head.
• League of Nations are like “good wrestlers with no creativity” They just seem like they have no entertaining ideas outside of the ring like a Social Outcasts or New Day. Del Rio does the hand with pointing finger circling the head taunt before his finish. Now Sheamus does it before the Ten Beats of the Bowery, and Rusev joins in with Del Rio and Sheamus.. It was just so like unnecessary and they looked so excited to do it. Like they all planned a group move before the match.
• Kalisto got the hot tag and shit got nuts, there was springboarding and flipping and yelling and diving, that all ended when Rusev landed a YUGE superkick on Kalisto

And I’m Like… That was kind of needed. The LoN are a pathetic group right now. Like the Bully’s who graduated high school but all dropped out of community college, yet they try and act like they are the cool guys from high school still. I bet they all wear Leather coats and sunglasses while smoking e-cigs too!

Renee Young asks Nattie how she “does it” She is on Diva’s and wrestles and is on Social Media. Nattie shows instagrams pictures of her working out while Subway is in the pictures and behind them in the interview. Nattie says lots of water and Subway is what helps get you healthy, along with 8 hours of sleep and working out…. Thanks?

Ryback vs. Adam Rose

• The Radical Mongoose name is taking off. “Goldberg” chants towards Ryback.
• Ryback cut a promo before the match talking about how ‘Spotlight’ won the Academy Award and something something he has the spotlight on him and it’s his time something something
• I just got used to Ryback in trunks, I am not used to Adam Rose in them.
• Ryback started throwing punches on Rose and wouldn’t stop, he started doing the whole MMA style punches. Hit Shell Shock and won then left.
• He did a Goldberg routine.

And I’m Like… The commentators are asking where that Ryback has been. I think this is the Ryback that was always planned, he just looked too much like Goldberg that they had to shed that and then he got lost along the way. A few years later we still have the Goldberg chants.

Y2AJ vs. New Day

• New Day get some promo time.
• New Day says they are the greatest and most successful group in WWE.
• New Day tries to make a three-way hug look gangsta.
• They were doing some weird promo when Jericho’s pyro went off.
• Instead of a Cesaro Section signs we have “They don’t want none” signs.. I approve!
• The AJ/Jericho team is something I didn’t know I liked. Like when I was watching old WCW pay per views and there was a Lex Luger vs. Michael Hayes match. No reason on why that match should stick out to me but it does, it just seems like a great match-up. Like AJ and Jericho, it shouldn’t feel that special, but I enjoy the idea of the team.
• Big E gyrates to Francesca II but instead of doing it with the flair he normally has, he stands straight up and down like he is Salmon dancing
• Xavier and Kofi try and do a joke that hilariously backfire. Xavier tells Kofi to pick a card while AJ was laying on the concrete on the outside. Kofi grabs a card, Xavier says “what did you get” (Kofi grabbed a king) “I got his number!” says Kofi without looking at the card. No Kofi you got his face card.
• Kofi and Jericho have a nice little battle that had Jericho triangle dropkicking Xavier and Francesca II, and Lionsaulting on Kofi. Then AJ does a springboard forearm to Big E. Jericho reverses the Trouble in Paradise for a Walls of Jericho victory.

A nd I’m Like… New Day are used where they need to be, but WHAT are they doing at Mania. AJ grabs the mic “I know I am the new guy here, but correct me if I am wrong. This victory puts Y2AJ at the top of the list for the titles. Y2AJ “is then new big thing in WWE” They are the Burger King Hot Dogs of WWE. AJ Styles is just loving these WWE crowds. He is so used to TNA type stuff, that he is genuinely surprised at some crowd responses.

Vince McMahon Comes Out

• McMahon lays this storyline on thick. The quick and dirty is. “Shane could win but he won’t because Hell in a Cell” “My daughter would quit” yada yada.
• McMahon introduces the Undertaker as his “instrument of destruction”
• I guess we forgot that McMahon was the higher power and Taker was listening to him a bunch.
• Undertaker looks like the Man in Black not Randal Flagg
• McMahon was talking about how he owns the Undretaker. Taker chokes McMahon and says “The blood of your son will be on your hands not mine.”

And I’m Like… Let’s see if we make it to WrestleMania. Titus O’Neil shoved Vince and McMahon suspended him for 60 days. Undertaker just choked him so that is what 90?

• McMahon grabs the mic and starts talking again about how Shane will lose his inheritance and everything else he has when he loses the match.

And I’m Like… That was kind of a waste… Where is Kevin Owens?

Jey Uso vs. Bubba Ray

• The story here is , two teams were on a team. The Dudleyz turned their back on the Uso’s after the match was over. They have wrestled each other twice on television. Now they are wrestling again to build interest. I don’t get how that works?
• Devon threw a table at Jimmy Uso and I legit laughed out loud.
• Cole says they are hypocritical but they said they wouldn’t put someone through a table. They never said they wouldn’t use one.
• Bubba hits the Bubba bomb for the three

And I’m Like… Fighting sleep and these two teams do not help at keeping me awake.

R-Truth and Goldust are in the backstage. R-Truth says he will not be Goldust’s partner. Truth then broke up with Goldust but then thought long and hard on their tag team.

Kevin Owens vs. Big Show

• Here is Kevin Owens.
• He had a tough time fighting Big Show until Owens through Big Show into the turnbuckle then punched him a bunch.
• Owens sneaks outside and hits a tornado ddt on Big Show to the outside. Show is up at 8 but gets back in the ring.
• Owens got a bit too confident and tried to go off the top rope. Show throws Kevin on the ropes.
• Owens nuts hurt too bad like he was Malaki Matthews and Big Show was Darin Corbin.

And I’m Like… Recaps and short matches? Is this Mid-South wrestling?

Renee interviews Brie Bella and I am looking for a Subway sandwich somewhere. Lana shows up and says Brie can never bite the big one. Lana compares yourself to Brie and says there is no comparison. Brie said until Lana can wrestle, she doesn’t have much power behind those words.

Naomi vs. Brie Bella

• How many different colors does Naomi have? She changes olors every tv show. Tamina and Naomi are working over Brie hard. We got leg trips and baseball slides.
• Brie is struggling to get in the ring and Tamina is just posted up on the stairs. Naomi needs to win soon because there is no suspense, Naomi will lose by distraction roll up or dominate Brie.
• Brie dodges an attack by Naomi but Naomi does those kicks over and over. Brie fires back with kicks of her own.
• Brie enters “Brie Mode” and she runs into Naomi’s head.
• Naomi put a new submission on Brie, Bella tapped and Naomi started punching Brie like Ryback was punching earlier.
• AS Naomi dances, Lana’s music hits. Lana slow claps like this isn’t another teen movie.

And I’m Like… Please not that match at WrestleMania.. I mean the story is fine but having Lana and Brie carry the comedy and acting is doing too much. I am thinking a multi-woman match or preshow battle royal.

We see the Freebirds are in the Hall of Fame now. From Badstreet to where ever the Hall of Fame is going to be. Fantasia is alive and well.

Becky is stoked for a rematch and Charlotte is grossed out by Becky showing excitement. She does some middle school taunting.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Dean Ambrose

• Poor Dean Ambrose. After a 3 hour Raw, you have to keep the crowd entertained, but you are against Del Rio…
• Alberto throws Ambrose into the barricade, does the finger twirl and all the other Euro’s try and do it quickly too.
• Even when a match has a short amount of time, Del Rio wrestles slow and methodical.
• Whatever Del Rio tries to do Ambrose is able to reverse it.
• Del Rio goes for a double stomp while Ambrose was on the barricade.
• Ambrose legit had to hold himself up for a good 45 seconds before Del Rio hit his move and all the LoN did the finger twirl thing. lol
• Ambrose and Del Rio fight back and forth with not much happeneing, then Ambrose throws Del Rio out the ring and Ambrose jumps on the whole League.

HHH Comes Out

• The ref is still in the ring and the LoN attacks so the ref then calls for DQ.
• LoN does the twirl and HHH shakes their hand after they dominate Ambrose.
• HHH was telling Dean how he would never beat the Authority
• Dean pops up and punches Hunter in the face. HHH says Ambrose gots the match.
• Ambrose got pedigreed and grabbed the mic and said “Hunter thanks” then he passed back out.
• HHH rolled up his sleeves and threw Ambrose outside the ring and over the table. Then HHH beat up Byron Saxton.
• HHH is doing the same beating to Ambrose except there were no cheers. That is the difference between Ambrose and Roman Reigns.
• HHH leaves Ambrose laying on the announce table as Raw ends.

And I’m Like… I think we should be paying attention to that Network Special for more WrestleMania setups. It could be a lot like the “War to Settle the Score”. This is either intriguing or setting us up for disappointment. Wait and see where it goes right? right!

Thanks for the read, let’s continue our road to WrestleMania

Please share and like and comment, every little bit helps.

Have a good day everyone

-Jake.

http://www.cheap-heat.com/and-im-like-reviewing-monday-night-raw-february-1st-2016/ http://www.cheap-heat.com/and-im-like-reviewing-monday-night-raw-february-1st-2016/#respond Tue, 02 Feb 2016 05:34:54 +0000 Jake Drury Blogs Other Blogs Reviews Adam Rose AJ Styles Alberto Del Rio and I'm like Becky Lynch Big E Big Show Braun Strowman Brie Bella Brock Lesnar Byron Saxton Charlotte Cutis Axel Dean Ambrose Dolph Ziggler Erick Rowan Goldust Heath Slater HHH JBL Kalisto Kevin Owens Kofi Kingston Lana Luke Harper Michael Cole Naomi Nikki Bella Paul Heyman R-Truth Raw Results Raw Review February 1st Roman Reigns Rusev Sasha Banks Social Outcasts Tamina The Miz The New Day The Usos Titus O'Neil Tyler Breeze Xavier Woods http://www.cheap-heat.com/?p=15812 Hey y’all, I wrote two other reviews today so let’s crank out this last one shall we? Monday Night Raw Opening The intro song starts off the show, that is a rarity. At least to my memory.   Brock Lesnar Brock has a new shirt, well it is still the Suplex City design, but it is […]

Hey y’all, I wrote two other reviews today so let’s crank out this last one shall we?

Monday Night Raw Opening

• The intro song starts off the show, that is a rarity. At least to my memory.

Brock Lesnar

• Brock has a new shirt, well it is still the Suplex City design, but it is red now.
• The triple threat match is advertised. I know we all are in the ‘Roman wins’ boat. I also know, not too many people would want to see Lesnar and HHH again. I am leaning towards Dean Ambrose winning if only for the story telling possibilities. Plus it’s easier to boo Roman Reigns. He is damn near perfect, who wants to cheer for that guy. (Not Mr. Perfect, everyone loves him.)
• Paul Heyman says we will cover a lot of business tonight. Heyman brings up the Wyatt’s.
• Paul says that Brock will deal with the Wyatt’s whenever he wants. Heyman reminds me of a lawyer pleading his case to a judge. He is totally an advocate, he chose the perfect word to describe himself.
• Heyman added the tagline “brother vs. brother vs. beast”
• Lesnar just bouncing back and forth while Heyman calmly talks is so disturbing. I feel like Lesnar is a caged monster and that cage is his own self control.
• I imagine Heyman follows Lesnar everywhere. “Brock Lesnar will brush his teeth, Brock Lesnar’s teeth are so white. Plaque runs away from Brock Lesnar when the Beast thinks about dental care.” “Brock Lesnar will change that diaper, he can wipe a butt with the grace of a predatory lion.” I think we all need someone like Paul Heyman to introduce us and make us feel unstoppable. I would love to have an advocate like that.

Dean Ambrose enters

• Ambrose calls Heyman porky….
• Ambrose says he says to himself “self” and I like it cause I DO THAT !!
• Ambrose says he is not crazy or stupid but he respects Brock Lesnar. He tells Lesnar he is not scared.
• Dean says he wants the World Title so bad he would fight his own brother for it. He knows the beating he will receive at Fastlane “take me to suplex city baby” He says Brock better be prepared to give Ambrose the worst beating he has ever given anyone.
• Ambrose calls himself “the Ironman” of WWE. New nickname GET THE T-SHIRTS MADE.
• Ambrose laid down his promo and left the ring. He asked for a trip to Suplex City and then doesn’t wait for the ride?
• Lesnar is laughin in disbelief.

And I’m Like… Quick concise and to the point. I like openings like that. It really added drama to the Ambrose/Lesnar dynamic. I liked how that was presented, yes, three guys are involved but having 3 separate reasons for the match outside of ‘we want the title’ will make that match so much better!

Kalisto vs. Rusev w/ Lana

• Del Rio is at ringside and I smell shenanigans .
• Rusev got his own entrance, Del Rio was out first. Are The League of Nations still a cohesive unit? Or are they just hanging out to raise each others profiles.
• Rusev = TV Champ sign!!!
• Del Rio said he lost the last two times against Kalisto because he got cocky.
• This match feels very fresh. It’s speed vs. strength. Problem for Kalisto is Rusev is plenty quick. Like when Kalisto tried jumping over the top rope at Rusev. Rusev was quick enough to kick Kalisto in the face.
• Do you think that having Kalisto’s chant be “lucha” people google that and discover Lucha Underground?
• We come back from break and Rusev is still in charge. Cole brings up a good point. If Rusev wins does he get title contention status for the U.S. Title? That would cause a rift in LoN right?
• I never thought about it til now but Rusev’s name in NXT was Alexander Rusev.. Meaning Lana’s full name is Lana Rusev right?
• Kalisto is in pinball mode jumping off all the ropes and spinning and flipping. Rusev is a bull though so he just caught Kalisto and slammed that dude to the ground like Rusev was apart of Onyx .
• Kalisto did the basement hurricanrana but only Kalisto’s feet hit the mat, Rusev’s head didn’t come close.
• Del Rio took his headset off cause he wanted to motivate Rusev. Kalisto tried jumping at The Bulgarian but Rusev caught him.
• Rusev tries to throw Kalisto onto the table but Kalisto landed on his feet. Hurricanrana’d Rusev into the barricade and made it to the ring by 10.

And I’m Like… Kalisto won, no shenanigans. I am so surprised. Pleasantly surprised. This is building to Del Rio vs. Kalisto vol. 7.

Roman and Dean are backstage with Stephanie. She gives Paul Heyman credit for making fun of Ambrose. She reminds Roman Reigns that he lost his belt 8 days ago. Roman acts like he don’t care because of course he does. Steph foreshadows by saying “Dean you said you’d do anything for the WWE championship.” I am asking, does Dean holding the IC title up the prestige of the belt by being in the WWE Number One contender match? He isn’t defending the title, but he is getting it on TV. Stephanie talks about how absolute power corrupts. She is really planting the seeds, but Roman and Dean can see through it and tells her it doesn’t work. Steph books the main event tonight. Dean and Roman vs. New Day.

Renee interviews Brie about Nikki Bella. Brie talks about future projects until Charlotte shows up. Charlotte ‘nice bitches’ Nikki. Charlotte takes the blame for Nikki’s neck surgery. Brie is trying to be nice and cordial but Charlotte is pushing the buttons of Brie. Charlotte is gloating about her greatness, I would say she is aloof but she is champ right now..

The Uso’s vs. Social Outcasts.

• Since Roman gots New Day in the main event we know The Uso’s are open for a feud right?
• LOLOL Lillian Garcia said Uso’s are ‘Grammy Award’ winning.
• Cole covers Lillian’s mistake but JBL won’t let it go “we need Chimel back”
• Heath makes fun of Uso’s saying they aren’t family. They keep saying how tight they are and they are like the “tightest brothers in WWE”
• They can’t find Bo Dallas because he is recording rap songs. The Social Outcasts are trying to do the New Day thing, I don’t know if it is garnering a reaction but I am entertained in their doofusness.
• Cole says Thursday a new WWE.com show will start and The Social Outcasts will play the Uso’s in a friendly game of cornhole… That could have been plugged later. I don’t want to be told that these guys are friendly WHILE they are beating each other up. That takes away some of the reason for these guys to wrestles and just makes it seem like they like to feel punishment and pain. I know wrestling is scripted but damn.
• Adam Rose has a headlock on an Uso for a while. Headlocks make me ponder todays wrestling scene. People get injured because of the style of wrestling, it’s high impact high speed ALL THE TIME. How catn you train an audience to accept headlocks again? Like, 80’s matches had headlocks and reverse chinlocks and arm wringers all the time, the crowd still was hootin and hollering. Now if a headlock is applied for more than 2 minutes, the crowd is chanting “boring”. If we want the wrestlers to get injured less, we as fans need to be invested in the lower impact style.
• The Uso’s hit their signatures and splash for the win.

And I’m Like… Ugh The Uso’s dancing bothers me.. At least the Outcasts got on TV. That match will not be remembered next week, but it happened this week. I hope Bo really is recording an album. He needs Sami Zayn and Xavier Woods to feature with him. Just stay away from R-Truth, Bo…

Miz TV with AJ Styles

• I am worried for this. Miz TV segments usually are soft shell taco mild sauce. I want hot flavor you know? AJ isn’t hot flavor on the mic. He makes up for it in the ring but this has me worried.
• Miz says MizTV is a public service. It is a forum for storytelling, he says AJ’s story is phenomenal.
• This could be good as an introduction for the casual WWE fewer that has never heard of TNA or NJPW.
• AJ’s theme still adds an aura of hipness to him. Yes, I know if I use the word hip I am not hip. Therefore I can’t tell who is hip and who isn’t.
• Miz is doing his MizTV gimmick that he did on the first episode, he asks the question and then answers the questions. That is very smart.
• AJ adds himself to the pantheon of southern accented WWF wrestlers. It’s not that long of a list I think, I remember Dr. D, Jeff Jarrett, Jim Ross, Cornette, umm….. yeah, actual wrestlers from the South? Can’t think of many. I know I am missing tons.
• Miz is rambling about AJ and I am losing interest. Miz is the bad guy, he is given the job to get a guy over as a good guy by complimenting him, and telling him he is like Daniel Bryan.
• STFU MIZ!!! Don’t bring up Daniel Bryan, it’s sad enough Bret Hart told us he has cancer, now you bringing up the one guy that draws out emotion EVERYTIME he hits the ramp. Too much.
• Miz wants to mentor AJ Styles. AJ pay attention to Alex Riley and Damien Mizdow. Their careers are in the toilet now.
• Miz says “who the hell is AJ Styles anyway” Miz says “This is the WWE and the E is just as important as the W” The crowd just chants “AJ Styles”
• Damn if The Miz didn’t achieve his goal, this guy is crazy talented at crowd manipulation. Too bad AJ looks like he is about to cry when he is supposed to look angered… Actually I don’t know what AJ is supposed to look like.
• AJ attacks Miz with so much fire!! Hot Flavor y’all and AJ didn’t say a word on the mic and he made an impression.
• Guy in Bullet Club shirt was not cheering when AJ was kicking ass. SHAME!

And I’m Like… Shocked at how much I underestimated the Miz at getting someone cheered. The man has a gift, he just couldn’t do it for himself. I don’t know if AJ is feuding with Miz, I thought Miz was doing something with Neville. I don’t know anymore, I am trying to figure out where the pieces will be come Wrestlemania, but a lot is still up in the air.

Brie Bella vs. Charlotte

• Cole tells us to talk about this using #TotalDivas even though Charlotte isn’t on the show.
• Charlotte starts the match off with push-ups. She relishes this role so much. I can appreciate Charlotte is good at her job but I want to boo her so bad… Not too many other wrestlers get that reaction out of me.
• Charlotte also looks so vicious when she hits her offense.
• It seems like Charlotte moves so naturally and doesn’t think about how she is doing what she is doing. She is in the moment. Brie not so much. She is so awkward in the ring because she is very apparent in how she is thinking about what to do next and how to do it.
• Charlotte is dominating and Brie is trying to pull something out that will work against Charlotte.
• Now that Charlotte is the definitive heel, that kind of makes all the other girls on the show faces. The Bella’s allegiances change on a whim, everyone else seems to not do anything to get boo’d.
• Brie countered a Figure-8 with a small package and won. I’ll give that one to Daniel Bryan for teaching the ways of the small package.
• Charlotte looks embarrassed. Brie looks shocked and happy.

And I’m Like… Brie got the pin? I don’t know about that, Charlotte must have been cocky like Del Rio was against Kalisto. I don’t have much to say about that.. What happened to Sasha? I knew that Total Diva hashtag meant trouble.

Erick Rowan vs. Big Show

• Rowan is one of the only guys his size that are not believable to win a match. I am legit surprised every time Rowan wins a match or gets the pin. Even though he is a big man, in a group of giants he is ‘take the pin guy’
• It’s funny the Wyatt’s took out Brock to pick a fight, he didn’t answer right away, so they don’t know what to do. They are like ‘welp, beat up Big Show?’
• Big Show won very fast with a chokeslam because Erick Rowan. Strowman and Big Show had a staredown but The Wyatt’s destroyed Show. They are Brayless too.

And I’m Like… The crowd is chanting “Cena”? Wyatt’s only need 3 guys to take out the Big Show. Wyatt’s don’t take too many people out if they aren’t involved in a storyline. This either means they are gonna get in a storyline or that Big Show is weak lately. Luke Harper is being the Warchief and leading the battle. The Wyatt’s slam Show on the steel aluminum steps while Harper “Yeah, Yeah, Yeah’s”

Titus O’Neil vs. Tyler Breeze

• Tyler Breeze never had vignettes, he lost Summer Rae, but he is on TV though. I really hope Zoolander 2 is a hit so that can jump start Breeze’s career again. Stiller has been on RAw before.
• Breeze says Titus is an uggo cause he wore a helmet to cover his face.
• JBL says Breeze is wearing Gucci pants.
• As Cole was gonna let Byron put Tyler over Titus caught Breeze mid-air and that made Cole change topics mid-conversation. Poor Tyler
• I hate that I watched Breaking Ground and it made me like Breeze even more, he was so validated to get called up. Granted he gets a bigger paycheck and is on television, it just seems like feuding with Titus is a waste of Tylers talents.
• Speaking of waste of talents, Fandango? Where he at?
• Tyler got almost no offense in but got caught in Clash of the Titus.

And I’m Like… These matches are going by quickly, it makes Raw zoom by, but I don’t feel like anything of substance is happening. Like, has anything happened yet tonight? Brie won….

HHH shows up and asks Paul to give him and Brock a second with the camera man. I understand that Paul can’t be in there but if he runs to a monitor he can catch up. HHH says Brock is getting soft for not destroying Dean. Lesnar answers with “I guess we’ll find out at Wrestlemania”

Dolph Ziggler vs. Kevin Owens

• This match was so good let’s do it again.
• You know someone would really benefit from WWE programming if their gimmick was “best of 7 series”. The guy will only move on to another opponent after he won a best of 7 series. That way every time they wrestle every week it will have meaning. I’m not saying its sustainable, but it would help weekly television.
• Owens blocked Ziggler’s DDT on the outside and threw him over the barricade for commercial break.
• We come back from break and Owens has a headlock in. Do you think the ref tells them when to do the headlocks? The timing of those headlocks with commercial breaks are so punctual.
• Ziggler is getting his ass kicked so bad we keep seeing picture in picture replays of all the times he is getting hit hard. WWE loves to replay actual violence. If something legit dangerous happens they replay it over and again during the match.
• Owens missed the pop-up powerbomb and Ziggler was able to get Kevin on the apron then hit him with a superkick.
• Ziggler leaves the ring and delivers the fameasser on the outside of the ring to Owens.
• The Twitter feed is talking about how the Uso’s won a Grammy. Poor Lillian.
• Owens was in control and went to the top rope. Ziggler tried to reverse that with a top rope facebuster. Owens fought out of it twice. Got Ziggler in the tree of woe, hit a cannonball, went for a pop-up powerbomb, missed. Ziggler hit the Zig Zag and won….

And I’m Like… 50/50 means that these two will wrestle each other for the rest of the month probably. Byron “can’t believe Ziggler won” YEAH RIGHT!! There are very few people I am shocked lose. Ziggler and Owens are not one of them. They have characters that can win and lose all the time and retain credibility.

Sasha Banks vs. Becky Lynch

• Serotonin gets released when I hear Sasha Banks theme song.
• The announcers are really putting over how great Sasha is. I’ve learned to listen to the subtle lines of Cole.
• Sasha Banks says “the Boss is back and it’s on my term. No more sitting in the back and watching other Diva’s steal my spotlight.” She says she is on her own… what about “UNITY?”
• Naomi came out with Tamina… good I need closure.
• Naomi says “look at baby girl, spreading her wings, stepping out on her own.” Sasha says Team B.A.D. is a family but she came her to be the best. Tamina cut her off.
• Naomi said she knew this moment would come. “at some point, we all have to make our own mark and create our own legacy.” Tamina said they came out to congratulate her. She don’t want to end up like Wiz and Kanye. Naomi said “we can be competitors and be sisters.”
• Sasha says she has a match with Becky by herself, she wants to know if they have her back.
• She goes for the Unity fists. and UNNNIIITTYYY!!! YES!
• Bex comes out alone and I am really nervous for Sasha.
• Remember that match on NXT with these two? They just tore each others arms off. I know it will be FOREVER until there is that much crowd investment and drama in a diva match, but damn.. good times.
• This match so far is pin attempts and reversals. They are looking a little planned, the spots I mean.
• Sasha looks directly into the camera and yells at Charlotte.
• Byron says BOSS stands for “Built On Self Success” Cole says Becky was “Built On Hard Word” so BOHW?
• Naomi and Tamina tried to beat up Becky but Sasha said she got it covered. Sasha tried to send them to the back…
• The only difference between United and Untied is where the I is put. Looks like Team B.A.D. is broken up. Becky helps out Sasha and Team BAE is in the ring as the crowd showers them in chants of “NXT”

And I’m Like… Story advances, emotions are shown, characters gain strength. I like how Becky is still the girl that just wants things to be just and have wrestling matches. Sasha is someone that wants to do it on her own, and Tamina and Naomi were down for their team until they were kicked to the side. The only gripe I have is the crowd that was quiet during the whole match but then when Becky and Sasha stand tall at the end of the segment there are NXT chants? What are we chanting for? Brand warfare? It surely isn’t woman’s wrestling, or you would have heard the crowd during THE MATCH. Oh well, this is a long road to travel to get this Woman’s wrestling thing respected by the casual crowd.

Jericho is quoting old Rock and Roll… He is paying respect to rock legends, I get it. If his gimmick is Cool Dad, he would totally quote old rock songs.

R-Truth is in the bathroom and Goldust is waiting on top of a toilet to ask Truth to get in a tag team. He says they should be called “Golden Truth” Truth said Goldust is a weirdo so he doesn’t want to be on a team. Goldust brings up Lil’ Jimmy Truth’s imaginary friend. These are like the two oldest guys on the roster and they are doing bathroom storylines about being a tag team. Wrestling is weird. You got a rapper who has an imaginary friend and a man who thought he was an Oscar, then was an artist formally known as himself, then like a Tourettes guy, then he has been a combination of all three since.

New Day vs. Roman Reigns and Dean Ambrose

• The New Day got mics!
• Paul Heyman is at ringside… Lesnar is destroying someone tonight.
• The New Day are sick and tired of The Rock.
• Big E brings up Amber Rose putting her finger in Kanye’s butt. That is two Kanye references in one night. I guess that is all that was pop cultury in the past week.
• The New Day told The Rock to “Think about the Children and the Babies”
• New Day tells a little kid they will fight him, that little kid is in a Bullet Club shirt and doing the Big E hip dance!!! Oh God! Can you imagine that kid doing that at school!! LOL..
• I love that Big E always wants to stay PG. Xavier and Kofi say Ambreigns is the name of tumblr fan fiction. They were gonna talk about it but Big E cut them off because PG.
• Roman Reigns comes out alone down the stairs… What Dean can’t be with you no more? Your a F’N team
• Cole says they will be in Seattle next week… They did a Daniel Bryan reference this week. PLEASE SHOW UP!! PLEASE DANIEL!! YOUR OUR ONLY HOPE!!!
• Kofi moves from hammerlocks to head locks to arm wringers to wristlocks and then pushes Roman and yells “get off me” Kofi is so funny sometimes. So glad he turned heel and did more than smile and clap.
• After Kofi got worked over for most of the match Roman went for a Superman punch and they pulled Kofi to the outside.
• I still remember that night New Day took out Cena and the Dudleyz and stood tall. That night did so much for them, they really only looked tough and strong one night. All the other night’s they are having too much fun.
• After seeing Big E do that apron splash on Bubba Dudley that one time where it bent Bubba in half. I get nervous for that move now.
• Xavier won’t play Frencesca as often anymore because the crowd likes it. The only time we hear it is during the Unicorn Stampede.
• Since Team B.A.D. broke up that by proxy mean B.A.D. Day is no longer a thing. Remember that ONE TIME they were a thing on T.V.? I was so happy for those 5 minutes.
• Big E and Kofi are doing good at cutting the ring off from Dean Ambrose. Not good enough though because Roman got the hot tag. You heard kid voices cheering then male voices boo’ing…
• Roman was loading up a normal punch by legit doing a wanking motion. He punched Kofi. Then he did another wanking motion, kissed his hand then jacked it for Superman punch. Is Roman aware of how phallic his moves are? It’s like the Luniz song “I got 5 on it” Dude says “taking sacks to the face” in the song… no one told him that could be misinterpreted?
• Big E and Roman screwed up this spot where Big E was gonna put Roman through a table, The timing was off so they just kinda hugged and jumped.
• Big E went for the Darkest Hour (that’s the name right?) Roman was able to hit a Superman punch, Dean hit Dirty Deeds. Paul Heyman wasn’t really saying much. Ambreigns wins.
• Brock’s music hit and New Day attacked Ambriengs from behind.
• Lesnar runs in the ring and F-5’s Dean Ambrose while Roman and Kofi and Roman were fighting on the outside and then all of a sudden they both are laying down…

And I’m Like… all that end stuff with Roman was awkward as hell. It’s like he kept forgetting what to do. That’s the problem with having scripts, once something goes awry these guys don’t have the skills to save it using their abilities gained through being out without a net. The script helps the show with punctuality but it sometimes hurts things that are supposed to be ‘in the moment’.

That was a typical Raw episode. For character development we really only got two diva’s stuff and Golddust and R-Truth, everyone else stayed the same and did the same stuff. I still can’t wait til next week.

Thank you for reading.

Please like and share to spread the word and help me out. Also you will get cool points for the day!!

have a good one!

-Jake

http://www.cheap-heat.com/and-im-like-reviewing-royal-rumble-january-24th-2016/ http://www.cheap-heat.com/and-im-like-reviewing-royal-rumble-january-24th-2016/#comments Mon, 25 Jan 2016 04:18:47 +0000 Jake Drury Blogs Other Blogs Reviews WWE Network Reviews AJ Styles Alberto Del Rio and I'm like Becky Lynch Big E Big Show Braun Strowman Bray Wyatt Brock Lesnar Byron Saxton Charlotte Chris Jericho Curtis Axle Dean Ambrose Dolph Ziggler Erick Rowan Goldust Heath Slater HHH Jack Swagger JBL Kalisto Kane Kevin Owens Kofi Kingston League of Nations Luke Harper Mark Henry Michael Cole Neville Paul Heyman R-Truth Ric Flair Roman Reigns Royal Rumble 2016 Royal Rumble Results Royal Rumble Review Rusev Sami Zayn Sasha Banks Sheamus Stephanie McMahon The Miz The New Day The Usos Tyler Breeze Vince McMahon Xavier Woods http://www.cheap-heat.com/?p=15742 Hey everyone, it’s that time of year again. Royal Rumble is an event that seems to get a lot of hype. I have never really been a fan of battle royals. I still enjoy them, I just have never felt emotion outside of OH SHIT! I enjoy it mostly because of the game my family […]

Hey everyone, it’s that time of year again. Royal Rumble is an event that seems to get a lot of hype. I have never really been a fan of battle royals. I still enjoy them, I just have never felt emotion outside of OH SHIT! I enjoy it mostly because of the game my family plays. This will be the first year we don’t because of the small group watching it. Life gets in the way and people get busy.

The game we play is basic. Put 30 numbers in a hat. Divide 30 by how many people are with. We usually had 6 people so we would all get 5 numbers. Whoever comes out when your number is up is your person, put some money in and we got everyone invested in every person in the match. Good times!

The preshow was fun, Social Outcasts held down the Social Media room and answered questions most entertainingly. Mark Henry and Jack Swagger won the four-way tag match, even though Sandow was OVER LIKE ROVER!

My cousin who is a freshman in high school, tried signing up for the Network tonight but it wouldn’t process his request. I lent him my Network account, just cause WWE dropped the ball on him signing up doesn’t mean he won’t watch Royal Rumble. He pulls for Roman and Ambrose and the Uso’s.

Get ready to point at the sign for 3 months y’all.

Royal Rumble Opening-

• The show starts with a limousine and Vince McMahon followed by Stephanie. Vince is stoked to see JoJo
• How did JoJo get a job? She was 19, then became a backstage announcer? What is she about? She a wrestling fan?

Last Man Standing Match

Intercontinental Title Match

Kevin Owens vs. Dean Ambrose

• They go at it real fast and furious.. Not holding back at all with the punches
• Kevin Owens is the best, you know how he hates Cole? Owens got thrown over the table and when he was trying to get up, a knocked down Michael Cole was next to him, and Kevin kept shoving Coles face.
• The first 10 count happened when Ambrose threw Owens into the steps. Owens got up and Ambrose attacked him with the kendo stick.
• Cole was cheering for Ambrose like crazy.
• Kevin Owens gets advantage of the situation and cannonballs Dean Ambrose through the barricade.
• Owens splits a kendo stick in half and stabs Dean Ambrose. Yells at him to stay down. This is just a fight!!
• Owens starts covering the ring in chairs, that seems to be a staple for Ambrose matches.
• Owens and Ambrose fight over two chairs set up, they tease moves on the chairs. Ambrose hits his rebound lariat for a 4 count. Ambrose gets hit with a chair for a 6 count.
• Owens keeps trying to put Ambrose through the chairs but Ambrose is able to back body drop Owens.
• Ambrose tried to dive through the ropes but Owens caught him in a bearhug and rammed Dean into the apron.
• Owens pulls out a table. This match is- one guy does a big move, the other guy answers back with a big move. Back and forth. One guy is knocked down so the other guy sets up weapons.
• Owens stacked two tables outside like this was WWE 2k16
• Owens goes to superplex Ambrose, I don’t think he has his three finishers saved up yet so it didn’t work.
• Ambrose threw a chair at Owens head and it got stuck around his neck.
• Ambrose does his strike combination but gets caught with a superkick. Owens goes for a pop up powerbomb but Ambrose reversed into a hurricanrana followed by a Dirty Deeds.
• Dirty Deeds on the chair by Ambrose now.
• Owens played it smart and rolled out of the ring so he landed on his feet as the crowd screamed “fight Owens fight”
• Ambrose puts Owens on a table and dives off the top through a table.
• Owens got up and Ambrose got another table, he puts the table in the ring and attacks Owens with a chair.
• Owens should hit a big move next because of the way the match is working.
• Yep, Owens hits his fisherman buster from the top rope through a table. Owens got up at 8, Ambrose got up at 9.
• Owens yelled stay down and Ambrose got popped up and powerbombed down.
• Ambrose gets up and Owens attacks with chairs.
• Owens sets up 5 or 6 chairs and lays Ambrose on them. Owens climbs to the top rope and Ambrose rushes him and throws Owens through the stacked tables!!!!!! That’s all folks.

And I’m Like… That match was bonkers . Ambrose should have won that so Owens can move on to bigger and better things going into Mania. This was a perfect way to start off the Rumble. The match story was basic but it was told well, couldn’t ask for much more out of these too.

we get a commercial lolol. I can’t believe the people that pay $50 and have to watch a commercial.

Tag Team Championship Match

New Day vs. The Uso’s

• Big E says he is sad about losing the trombone Francesca. Francesca got it’s (her?) own chant. Fran-cesca.
• Xavier Woods came out with a bigger trombone. The crowd cheered then boo’d. The newest member of the New Day is Francesca 2.
• Kofi said what about Francesca? Xavier said he has needs so he had to get a new one.
• My feed keeps cutting out of HD… Is this the producers of the Oscars?
• New Day does a bunch of golden references. They dance until The Uso’s come out.
• Boo-So… amirite?
• This match has THE BRIGHTEST tights ever. You got neon yellow, green, and orange in the Uso’s and Neon pink and blue for The New Day.
• JBL told Byron he wouldn’t know about street cred. Byron said you’d be surprised.
• Big E knocked an Uso to the outside, then started slowly gyrating and grinding behind Uce. Uso reversed it.
• Xavier hit a tornado DDT off of the barricade!!
• Xavier yells into the Trombone and it raises the volume of his voice.
• Woods doing great heel work. The crowd chants “play Francesca” and Xavier throws her down and the crowd Boo’s.
• The crowd (thinking the NXT fans) chant “heeey we want Francesca”
• They also do a “New DayRocks” even though they just booed Xavier.. so yeah NXT crowd.
• Not all of the NXT crowd just the annoying ones…
• A great spot happens when Kofi and Uso start to both superkick each other. Kofi just trips up an Uce and gains control easy. By the way… Superkicks get so spammed so often yet they still have a great impact.
• The match broke down when Big E went for a dive out of the ring, an Uso blocked it. Kofi went to take him out but other Uce dove on Kofi. Big E hit the dive to the outside and all men were taken out.
• The Uso’s went for their finish, the crowd boo’d relentlessly.
• After a few pin reversals, Big E hit the Big Ending for the win.

And I’m Like… That was a piss break/smoke break match. The match was fun though, Xavier Woods is a great manager. New Day are why the match is enjoyable. The Uso’s are there yea, but they haven’t deviated from their style in years so it’s kind of rinse and repeat. I hope the New Day get a good program after this, not sure against what team, maybe Social Outcasts?

The Wyatts cut a promo about being The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. I hope Tyler Breeze gets some tv time soon because Zoolander. Bray sings “he’s got the whole world in his hands” Can I get a cover of “ with my baby tonight “

United States Championship

Kalisto vs. Alberto Del Rio

• Brock Lobster sign!!!
• This is my pee break match… Won’t be able to do a play by play seeing as how I am blogging while I watch it. So I will be gone for a bit and come back…
• (leaves to take break ) My cousin said “why two Mexicans fighting for the United States Title WTF?” lol
• I come back with Del Rio doing his finisher which my cousin Matt dubbed “wrestling is real”. My cousin Nick is the freshman in high school, my cousin Matt is watching the Rumble with me while my wife and daughter are sleeping in the other room.
• After I came back from break I asked Matt what I missed… he said “nothin much” so there ya go.
• Kalisto reversed Wrestling is Real Stomp and hit Salita Del Sol and Del Rio got his arm on the rope at 2.
• After some more moves and stuff Kalisto hits another SDS and becomes a two-time United States champion.

And I’m Like… Sorry if you were interested in that match, if you wanted to know what happened just watch Raw from last week. Same title change and everything. Let’s hope Del Rio gets away from that US Title. He took what Cena did to it and bathed the title in mediocrity.

We see Stephanie texting while Paul Heyman showed up. He calls her Madame McMahon. Not much has been said, other then what Paul has been saying the past few weeks.

Divas Championship

Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte

• Cousin Nick texts me and says “finally”, he is 14. Cousin Matt says “we have to watch a video about this fuckin girl? I don’t even like her” he is 30. I am 26 and am so stoked for this match. Demographics I guess.
• The video package told us the life story of Charlotte and Becky Lynch since being on Raw. I am getting butterflies you guys!!
• Becky comes out in a Mad Hatter type outfit. The crowd Whooaahh’s with her entrance song. Cousin Matt says “her and her stupid hat” I think he is a Charlotte fan, Cousin Nick texted “Becky all the way!!!”. I just want a good match followed by a Charlotte win so Sasha can beat her at Mania.
• Charlotte holds her belt up, I go “ugh” cousin Matt goes “I know” I said “that pimple glitter by her eye?” He said “oh I thought you were talkin bout the belt.. she should throw that in the garbage”
• This match is starting off with a catch-as-catch-can style, going move for move and hold for hold. The pace is fast too “let’s go Becky” by the crowd.
• Becky is working over Charlotte’s arm so it will be harder for Charlotte to bridge on her Figure-8. Charlotte works over Becky’s arm a bit to show she is better at everything.
• Charlotte tries to hide behind Ric but Becky knows the routine, waits for Charlotte so show herself and catch her with a clothesline. Ric Flair forced himself on Becky instead. Let’s say Flair pulled a Cosby. Becky was so repulsed that it misdirected her attention and Charlotte took advantage.
• JBL drops Arnold Skaaland managing Bruno Sammartino as a reference to Ric and Charlotte. I like it.
• Becky reversed the Figure-8 and then Charlotte reversed Becky’s submission attempt. This match is still move for move and hold for hold. The moves and holds are just getting more and more impactful.
• Who has the better spear? Charlotte or Roman Reigns?
• Becky is able to do the cross-armbreaker in a move reminiscent of last Monday when Becky beat Tamina.
• Charlotte did a Backlund one arm powerbomb for two. Flair is yelling for Charlotte over and over.
• Charlotte went to baseball slide Becky but Flair got hit instead. Becky puts her finisher on and Flair throws his coat over Becky’s head and Becky lets go of the submission. Charlotte hits a spear for the win.

And I’m Like… So if someone throws clothes in the ring on a person.. it’s not a DQ? FUCKIN SASHA BANKS!!!! OH MY GOD!!! I WOKE MY DAUGHTER UP!!!! Cousins are texting my other cousin is stoked too!!! There is the Mania sign too!!! OH MY GOD YOU GUYS!!!! Sasha just kicked Becky…. “My spotlight Becky” Sasha gots the pinkest hair. Dude!!! She shook Charlottes hand like NXT BFF style. I am disappointed… Charlotte and Ric leave the ring and SASHA ATTACKS LIKE A BOSS!!! She does her Bankstatement to Charlotte!!! She WOO’S too!!! Sasha grabs the Diva’s title and did a Flair strut… LIKE A BOSS!!! The crowd popped, my cousin Matt is singing her theme song to my cat Macho Man.. Sasha.. thank you, you made my fucking week!! That was just great. Overshadowed the match but damn.. that reaction too tho.!

Can’t get much more of a wrestling high for me. Elation, excitement, validation, anticipation! Only thing that will make this night even better for me is if Daniel Bryan comes out.. I’ll probably cry though.. He gives me the most emotionals.

Royal Rumble for the World Heavyweight Championship

Not sure how I will write this.. like do I bold all the entrants? Do I count who threw who out? I think I am just gonna write what I see. This will be hard to do, like Jim Ross said “Royal Rumble is the hardest match to call.” I know I am gonna miss stuff.. This pay per view or free per event or whatever has flown by. Well paced and placed matches.. here we go. Lillian says 90 second intervals.. I wonder if it will hold true.

• Roman Reigns enters first to a smattering of boo’s.
• Rusev is number two. Cousin Matt predicts 3 and 4 are League of Nation guys as well.
• The story the announcers give us is that Rusev and Roman were the last two in the match last year. Roman already hit his signature and finisher.. Rusev is gone… boo.
• Aj Styles is here!!! Holy Shit.. Cousin Matt just sat STRAIGHT UP!! So stoked.. That theme song too.. MUAH!!
• This is our generations Sting and this is Sting vs. Hogan… That theme song tho..
• Aj looks around and the crowd is so hype it froze my feed!!
• Once we are rebooted Curtis Axel is in the ring!! He is a Minnesota favorite. Slater saved Axel from getting eliminated. Axel does the Mr. Perfect leg kick bump.
• Y2J is entrant number 6… So that means we missed one? Too bad I guess.
• Styles tries to do The Styles Clash as Michael Cole says. I guess I missed Tyler Breeze… he was thrown out already? Damn…
• Kane is out next, they need to fill this ring up so Roman can rest. Kane is beating all the people up.
• Jericho is almost eliminated and does the saddest elimination save this side of the Gimmick Battle Royale
• Goldust is on his way out and is entering his 11th Royal Rumble.
• JBL pulls a John Madden and says “you can’t win this match, you gotta not lose, and be the last guy in the ring when it’s over”
• Ryback comes out and the crowd goes mild… Ryback destroys people and does the “Feed Me More” chant and the crowd obliges.
• New Day are prepping Xavier to get in the ring but the graphic says Kofi Kingston so Kofi gets in the ring… How will he get eliminated this time?
• AJ gets back body dropped HIGH in the air.. lands on his hip like very rough. Jericho runs over to him and you can tell Jericho is checking on him. Tries to eliminate him, then Goldust tries, AJ fights off.
• Jericho is like the big brother.
• Roman is getting thrown out but the camera is too focused on AJ.
• R-Truth comes out and tries to bring a ladder into the ring… He climbs the ladder… once on top he looks confused and asks “what kinda match is this?”
• Kofi gets thrown over by Kane but Big E catches him and then they just hang outside of the ring.
• Luke Harper is out next at unlucky number 13.
• League of Nations come out and McMahon is with them. They pull Roman to the outside and decimate Reigns. Cole says “as they destroy Reigns on the outside” and my knee jerk reaction is ‘commercial’
• As the LoN sets Roman up on a table, Stardust comes out.
• Rusev runs from table to table and splashes Roman through a table. Good job Ru-Ru
• They all celebrate… even though he is knocked out, outside of the ring, and to lose you gotta get thrown over the top rope.
• Big Show comes out as Roman gets stretchered out.. Well Roman decides he is too strong and walks to the back while Roman is holding his ribs. That must mean they don’t think Roman has the stamina to last.
• Cousin Matt and I were wondering where New Day was and then a split screen shows us Jericho eliminated Kofi…. oh… shitty.
• Braun Strowman comes out and takes out Neville who came out before him in a cape. Kane and Braun fight quickly, Kane gets tossed over the top.
• Big Show faces off Strowman in the obligatory hoss standoff.
• Strowman eliminated Kane and Big Show…
• Kevin Owens limps his way to the ring… Seeing that he went through more physically than Roman, that means Owens is tougher… waaaay tougher.
• Owens goes right for AJ and eliminates him!!!! Give me that feud please and thank you. Good job AJ. Clap for that man.. not Dumbledore Clap, but still.. clap. The crowd chants “AJ Styles” as AJ makes his way to the back.. sweet…. too sweet.
• Dean Ambrose comes out bandaged up.. you know who isn’t? Kevin Owens.. toughest sumbitch in WWE.
• We are getting to the meat of this Rumble where all the guys just hang out and beat each other up without elimination.
• HOLY SHIT SAMI ZAYN!!! Holy Shit Zayn eliminated Kevin Owens!!! OH GOD.. Owens.. AJ… Sami… Dean… Intercontinental scene is hot right now!!!
• Erick Rowan comes out as the crowd “Ole’s their heart out.  Harper eliminated Stardust and Neville. Braun is legit just standing in the ring.. Not touching anyone..
• We get Mark Henry now.. he is number 22. I wonder when Roman comes back out, will he have a full entrance again?
• Braun eliminates Mark Henry and we got Dean, Sami, and Jericho against 3 Wyatts.
• Cole says “seeya bye” to Sami Zayn because Strowman.
• Brock Lesnar comes out and the crowd comes unglued. This is his second Rumble.. meaning Brock is undefeated in Royal Rumbles.
• Lesnar taking down Strowman is my minds equivalent to David and Goliath. Yes that makes Brock, David.
• Brock threw out Erick Rowan already. Cousin Matt says Brock will F5 Strowman before he throws the man out.
• Jack Swagger comes out and F-5’s Swagger and throws him over the top rope.
• Calling Jack Swagger a former World Champion diminishes the credibility of the belt, it doesn’t raise Swagger’s stock.
• The Miz comes out… and yeah.
• Miz comes out and gets hyped to take over Brock Lesnar. Miz goes and grabs the headset of the announcers and doesn’t go in the ring. He says “maybe Suplex City will be Mizney World.”
• Everyone outside of Brock Lesnar is just sitting there. We have Dean Ambrose, Braun Strowman, Brock Lesnar, Chris Jericho, and Miz on the outside.
• Alberto comes out and my cousin and I are thinking that we still need Ziggler, Sheamus, Bray Wyatt, and HHH?
• Brock clotheslines Braun a bunch and eliminates the Wyatt’s
• Bray’s timing could not be worse… his whole family is gone.
• Bray raises his arms and The Wyatts appear on the apron and in the ring. It’s 4-on-1 Brock eliminates the Family AGAIN and we are down to Brock and Bray…
• Brock goes to F5 Bray but Harper Superkicks Brock.. The Wyatt’s eliminate Brock…
• Bray goes right to Jericho who he has been feuding with for a few years.
• Lesnar is pretty pissed and my cousin is sighing.
• My cousin hears Zigglers music and wants Brock to attack him so bad. Lesnar doesn’t… Miz now decides to get in the ring.
• Sheamus music hits and Reigns runs down and punches Sheamus… Boo’s from the crowd.. He comes back refreshed damn this feels cheap… He got to rest while everyone else had to fight.. Owens and Ambrose went through so much more… Ambrose needs to get some justice..
• Roman is killing everyone and boo’s.. Orlando is an alcoholic cause they are full of booze.
• HHH is the 30th entrant.. Cole is shocked. Cousin Matt says “don’t look shocked Roman, you had to run past him.
• No Daniel Bryan by the way… Still boo’s at Roman, HHH got a cheer… For real though ? WrestleMania 25, when Orton beat up HHH and picked on his family. Reigns injured HHH and picked on his family. This is a retribution thing for HHH and I for one am pulling for him.
• They have a stare down and the crowd doesn’t really know how to respond
• Ambrose tries to eliminate HHH while Sheamus is simultaneously trying to eliminate Roman. Bray runs at Sheamus and slams him. Everyone hits signatures. Ziggler almost eliminates HHH with a superkick that had me scared. Bray and HHH face off after that.
• HHH points at Roman and Bray laughs and throws punches at HHH. Wyatt reversed The Pedigree and Sheamus saved HHH from a Sister Abigail.
• HHH and Sheamus eliminate Bray Wyatt. Roman went for a double elimination but Sheamus and HHH held on.
• We have Roman, Dean Ambrose, Jericho, Sheamus, and HHH.
• Jericho hits a codebreaker to HHH and Ambrose throws him out, we are at the final four.
• Ambrose runs at Sheamus and instead of pulling the rope down Sheamus goes for a Brogue kick, Roman is able to eliminate Sheamus… HHH eliminates ROMAN REIGNS!!!
• Ambrose vs. HHH “let’s go Ambrose” from the crowd. Ambrose is the Intercontinental champion. Cole is losing his voice.
• Ambrose is trying so hard to eliminate HHH..
• Guess What? He doesn’t HHH wins and celebrates with his family..
• HHH followed in Flairs footsteps once again.

And I’m Like… That was crazy.. It was predictable yes, but it still pulled it off very well. The best way to get feuds going was this match… I don’t have much to say, I am satisfied with the story told and the stories going forward. Fastlane will be interesting.. We are now on the Road to WrestleMania!!! Safe travels everyone.

Please like and share to make me feel like my words matter and stuff.

Have a good one

-Jake

http://www.cheap-heat.com/and-im-like-reviewing-raw-january-18th-2016/ http://www.cheap-heat.com/and-im-like-reviewing-raw-january-18th-2016/#respond Thu, 21 Jan 2016 03:13:16 +0000 Jake Drury Other Reviews Reviews 1/18/16 Adam Rose Alberto Del Rio Alicia Fox and I'm like Becky Lynch Big E Big Show Bo Dallas Braun Strowman Bray Wyatt Brie Bella Brock Lesnar Byron Saxton Charlotte Chris Jericho Curtis Axel Dean Ambrose Erick Rowan Heath Slater JAnuary 18th 2016 JBL Jey Jimmy Uso Kalisto Kevin Owens King Barrett Kofi Kingston Luke Harper Michael Cole Monday Night Raw Review Natalya New Day Paige Paul Heyman Ric Flair Roman Reigns Rusev Ryback Sheamus Social Outcasts Stephanie McMahon Tamina The Dudleyz The Wyatts Vince McMahon Xavier Woods http://www.cheap-heat.com/?p=15716 Sorry for the late entry, yesterday I had a work meeting that went long and was home too late to watch Raw. It is Wednesday, but I have avoided all wrestling news so I can watch the show spoiler free. Let’s get to it!! Monday Night Raw Opening There is a video of Martin Luther […]

Sorry for the late entry, yesterday I had a work meeting that went long and was home too late to watch Raw. It is Wednesday, but I have avoided all wrestling news so I can watch the show spoiler free. Let’s get to it!!

Monday Night Raw Opening

There is a video of Martin Luther King, very good video package like normal. We should give some time to pioneers in wrestling for the African-American race. Ernie Ladd , Abdullah The Butcher , Bobo Brazil , Bearcat Wright , Sailor Art Thomas , Shag Thomas , Luther Lindsay , Burrhead Jones , Sonny King , Sweet Daddy Siki , Viro Small

We are live in Columbus Ohio..

Roman Reigns Comes Out

• We start the show off with the familiar guitar riff that is Roman Reigns theme song.
• Cole reminds us that Roman is against the odds, he defends his title against 29 other men in the Royal Rumble. They should put a woman in that match and have it be the first time a woman gets a title shot.
• We see a video package of Brock Lesnar rocking and rolling over the WWE Roster.
• Roman says tonight he only cares about one man, Brock Lesnar. He wants to finish the fight from last week.

Chris Jericho Comes Out

• Ugh
• Jericho comes out in a suitcoat and pants but no shirt because of course he does.
• I don’t get why his character doesn’t work for me. He obviously loves wrestling and knows how to work a card and build a program. He is just the MOST annoying. Like a kid in a restaurant whose parents let him run around and do whatever he wants.
• He says he is out here to make his Highlight Reel the biggest one of all time and recreate the snowstorm Raw from last year where Roman and Brock talk to each other.
• Roman says if Brock is gonna be there he will too and “Believe That”

League Of Nations Come Out

• There theme songs underrated.
• Sheamus says they are in the rumble too so don’t forget they can win. He shuts down a “you look stupid” chant. Will that chant continue after he changes hairstyles?
• Sheamus does a horrible joke about Jericho eating his shirt??? I mean I should be able to come up with a better one, but I think the joke is just Jericho in that outfit.
• Jericho does a joke about Sheamus looking stupid. Del Rio starts off saying perro and stuff.
• Del Rio points out he won the biggest Royal Rumble in history.
• Jericho is cutting the whole team down and trading barbs, while Roman stands there and is bored by this too.
• Thank goodness Rusev saves the day by saying. “In Bulgaria, every day is the Royal Rumble. I had to kick kids off the bus to go to school. MY family would throw a steak in the middle of  the ring, so I had to fight to eat.” He said one of them will win. Jericho said he didn’t understand him. Rusev said he wasn’t that smart.
• Jericho asks Roman who won the Royal Rumble last year? Roman said he won the match and threw out the guy they couldn’t understand (Rusev) then Jericho has a penis joke. Problem is, last few Rumble Winners were Roman, Batista, Alberto Del Rio, and Sheamus. Sheamus who threw out Jericho, making Jericho’s statement even worse.
• Rusev calls Jericho a stupid little Canadian.
• Roman says he isn’t busy right now, so he wants to shut Rusev up. Jericho just decides to make a match like last week… He even makes himself special referee.

And I’m Like… Is Jericho gonna have striped pants, or referee shirtless? That was a lame set-up. At least people are wrestling for a reason, but since when did Jericho decide to run the show? I think the reason NXT is always a better written show than Raw is because NXT has a creative team STEEEPED in wrestling knowledge. Raw has a lot of writers but not many that have been in wrestling for their whole adult lives. That makes Raw frustrating sometimes..

Rusev vs. Roman Reigns

• League of Nations is on the outside and Jericho is in the ring with a referee shirt on.
• Jericho made referee Mike Chioda take his shirt off so Chris could have a ref shirt.
• Rusev had a leg scissors on Roman who kipped up out of it.
• Wade Barrett is getting some gray’s in his hair. Maybe his next character can be “The Distinguished” or Just for Men, Wade Barrett.
• Rusev and Roman were both showing their power and doing some moves to each other. Rusev put Roman in a chinlock to maybe wear Roman down a bit so Rusev can get better control of the match.
• Rusev let go of the rest hold and got in Jericho’s face, that was enough time to allow Roman to gain momentum in the match. Before we go to break though Rusev had Reigns knocked back down.
• We come back from break with Rusev telling Roman to punch him in the face. Roman obliges a few times but then gets caught in a headlock by Rusev. Rusev forces Roman to the ground and turns the headlock to a front face lock.
• This match is very old school but is working because the crowd is chanting “Roman”
• Jericho getting compliments by JBL for counting while both men are down.. THANK YOU!
• Reigns is selling his chest or selling chest pains, he does a few clotheslines and holds his arm over his chest.
• As Roman had Rusev in the corner and unloaded multiple clotheslines. Jericho counted along with the fans to ten… The rules are a count of 5 Jericho, you legit went to nine…. Roman should be disqualified.
• Rusev decides he doesn’t want to play around and fireman carries Reigns to the middle rope. Roman fights out of it and ends up hitting a sit out powerbomb on Rusev for two.
• Sheamus was able to get at Roman because Jericho was talking to King Barrett and ADR. Y2J then starts throwing out the members of League of Nations one by one. Each time he builds up the moment and the crowd cheers every time. Jericho really milks his moment but the crowd is eating it up so what can I say.
• Rusev was stalking Jericho but Reigns hit Rusev with a Superman Punch and Jericho counts the three after the spear..

And I’m Like… That match was good, Jericho is not my beverage, but I usually like matches that has good crowd reactions and Jericho can really get a crowd to react. Roman celebrates with the crowd. Jericho has stepped out of the ring and we go to commercial.

Jericho is walking in the hallway all smug and shit when Stephanie shows up. Jericho is excited and tells Steph he took it to the next level. Stephanie says “Raw is not Jericho and it is not 1999” Jericho said he misses Stephanie from back in the day. McMahon rips on him and says “your very original just like all your material.” She says she is upset because now she has to pay Brock Lesnar more mNataoney for having Roman on the highlight reel.

Brie Bella w/ Alicia Fox vs. Natalya w/ Paige

• This is a total Diva’s feud… I forget how much these storylines don’t make sense. So there is a video package that Foxy unfollowed Paige on all of social media.. So they aren’t friends anymore…
• Byron is going over Natalya’s recent history and Cole points out everything that will be covered on Total Diva’s. We hear that Mandy is gonna be on Total Diva’s… Not any WWE show? Is she new Eva Marie?
• Natalya took some Yes! kicks, feigned fainting, got back up, reversed a Brie kick into a Sharpshooter for the win.

A nd I’m Like… That was something. Good to see Natalya back.

The Wyatt Family vs. The Dudley Boyz and Ryback

• I am pretty sure Bray Wyatt has been in a feud since he has started with the company. Kane, Daniel Bryan, John Cena, Roman Reigns, Dean Ambrose, Undertaker, The Shield, and Ryback. Now the Dudleyz, I’m sure I am forgetting someone. He is definitely always a focal point of WWE television.
• Since Ryback is with Dudleyz at least he is not against the Big Show.
• JBL screams right before commercial break “DUDLEYVILLE!!”
• Braun Strowman is on the outside, he will not be partaking in the match because Wrestling Ability.
• Member when he was a member of Adam Rose Experience? I feel like once Braun left, so did the party. Is Bray the ultimate lemon?
• Bray Wyatt hits those turnbuckles so hard I can hear Gorilla Monsoon saying “the ring must have moved a couple inches.
• Harper doing the Great Muta pose always makes me smile. Harper is just weird enough where he can do stuff like that and it doesn’t wreck his image
• I was thinking the other day, comparing WWE now to the WWF of territory days. WWE now is all the best wrestlers in the world under one roof. WWF was trying to make that happen and pretty much did. Any member of the current WWE roster could go to any indie promotion and be a draw. Guys like Erick Rowan don’t seem that skilled but have learned so much more than most wrestlers that haven’t been in WWE will. I think a lot of that has to do with matches. WWE runs a hard ass schedule but that’s the kinda schedule many guys did in the territories. I don’t know where the thought was going, I guess its just saying that WWE guys ability will grow tremendously because they have the ability to perform their craft more often.
• The Wyatt’s had a normal match, Ryback got taken out outside the ring. Luke Harper hit a discus clothesline for the win.
• Bray says “after Royal Rumble there will be no salvation.”

And I’m Like… The Wyatt’s are getting solid wins over the Dudleyz. I wonder what the Wyatt’s will do heading into Mania. Onto the next.

Big Show vs. Heath Slater

• Social Outcasts get microphones during their entrance like The New Day did to get themselves over. Good luck guys!!
• Heath Slater says they will be trending worldwide tonight. They have a pretty cool shirt with their faces on there. Adam Rose pushes Heath Slater out the way and says “With Aladdin’s magic carpet under my feet, I will never hit the ground.” Curtis Axle says “nobody knows what your talking about man. Everyone knows I was never eliminated from the 2015 Royal Rumble match.” Bo Dallas did not get a word in.
• Heath Slater is showing his quickness against Big Show. He taunts the Big man and Show punches Heath for the win. Axel comes in and tries to beat up Show.. Basically the whole team got punched in the face, then Bo survived.. victory lapped for surviving but then got punched in the face…. sad.

And I’m Like… I don’t need an example of why Big Show is a threat in the Royal Rumble… Hopefully this doesn’t start a loser guy streak for the Outcasts. At least they are on TV though!

Stephanie is talking to League of Nations which is cool, she doesn’t have an office, she just wonders the halls. Stephanie commends the League for holding their tempers when Jericho took advantage of the situation and the League themselves.

Sheamus just needs to win the Intercontinental Title and Tag Titles and he is the super grand slam winner: King Of The Ring, United States Championship, Money In the Bank, Royal Rumble, and WWE World HeavyWhereweight Championship…. Damn.

The McMahons tell us who the Number 1 person in the Rumble is

• McMahon says Who a bunch like he is in the New Day
• They put over how great McMahon did in the Royal Rumble.
• They roll the tumbler. McMahon picks a ball but can’t open it. Puts that ball away and opens a new one. Tells the drumroll to stop.
• Roman is number 1. They are trying again to make sure it is on the up and up so they put the ball back in and are picking again.
• McMahon struggles with the ball like he is opening a jar of pickles. Stephanie says “at least there is no phone like this isn’t McMahons Millions
• They keep picking Roman Reigns name over and over. Roman is number 1.

• Tamina comes out to a song that sounds like they are spelling unity. WHERE IS SASHA?!?!
• Becky Comes out in a weird face shirt… I’m sure it is significant somehow. Where is her Clockwork Orange attire?
• Becky yells that the Diva’s title is hers.
• Tamina looks more fluid than usual. I don’t know how often she wrestles.
• The story of this match is Tamina is powerful and Becky can’t handle it.
• Naomi does not look like she is enjoying being out there.
• Tamina is putting on a good show, Becky just got too worked up and hit a drop kick and tons of leg drops for two.
• Lynch is able to put Tamina in the disarmer by rolling through a top rope move..

And I’m Like… These matches tonight are fast and furious. Becky Lynch looks damn near unstoppable. She grabs the mic and says “nothing would mean more to me than winning the Diva’s championship this Sunday. Fist Charlotte I need an answer.” Charlotte says she won’t put the belt on the line at Royal Rumble because Charlotte already won that match. Becky calls out Ric Flair and, says Ric is a legend but maybe the “apple fell far from the tree” She is calling Ric a coward now too. Ric accepted the challenge and Charlotte does not look to thrilled. A reason to have a match people!!

Kevin Owens is on commentary.

Dean Ambrose and Kalisto  vs. League of Nations sans Rusev

• Bell rings and Sheamus goes right at Dean Ambrose who answers back with some blows of his own.
• Byron was trying to talk and Owens told him to shut up. Ambrose back drops Kalisto onto the League of Nations.
• We come back from break with Kalisto getting dropkicked after jumping off the top rope.
• It is hard for me to pay attention to this match because Kevin Owens is selling his match with Ambrose at the Royal Rumble like Canada selling air to China .
• Ambrose is soundly getting beat up by Sheamus and Del Rio.
• Byron asks why he is always the target of the announce team. Owens says “because of your incompetence”. Byron, you used to wrestle, try and take out Owens like Alex Riley did.
• Del Rio went for his double stomp and it took forever like usual so Ambrose was able to reverse it. Owens kept telling Byron to not talk, then when there was a moment of silence Owens said “Byron why aren’t you doing your job?”
• Kalisto gets the hot tag and Cole says “this is gonna be fun”
• Salida del Sol by Kalisto on Sheamus but Sheamus was saved by Del Rio. Del Rio then was able to kick Ambrose in the face. Sheamus hits a brogue on Kalisto and won the match.
• Owens says he is walking out champion and Ambrose laying on his back will be what happens on Sunday.

And I’m Like… I enjoyed Kalisto and Owens on commentary. Everything except the Byron bashing. A lot of these matches are death knells in the storylines before Rumble. Problem is, most of these storylines are so one dimensional it’s hard to get emotionally invested.

Speaking of emotionally invested, we have Francesca’s funeral.

Big E gives a eulogy in perfect cadence as a black preacher. Xavier is taking it THE HARDEST. Kofi promised him a new trombone. Can someone BONE HIM please?

Instead of New DayRocks it’s Fran-cesca.

Jey Uso vs. Big E

• New Day’s come out and do a moment of silence for Francesca. They come out and clap to the beat but are very angry. They do all their sexy dances, but are very angry. F-U Jericho.
• Big E is emotionally not in the match and it shows. Jey is using his smarts and quickness to stay on top of E. Big E over powers though and gains control early.
• Uso dabbed and danced but that was about it. The Uso’s talking always reminded me of something, I just can’t think of it. Stay tuned over the next few weeks and I will remember.
• Big E back body dropped Jey on the outside while we go to commercial.
• Over break Big E attempted his apron splash but missed, and that is where it all turned around.
• Jey hits a huge top rope cross body, but he doesn’t go for a pin.. why?
• Jey is hitting signature moves up the ass, they are all connecting too.
• Big E goes to jump through the ropes and misses, Jey Uso jumps and connects with Big E. Kofi and Xavier are trying to help Big E up when Jimmy jumps on Kofi.
• Xavier got involved when Jey was going off the top rope. Big E hit the big ending and that is the ball game.

And I’m Like… happy New Day won, except it “builds for Sunday” but what does it build? The match we just saw? New Day won for Francesca. It cuts from New Day to Titus O’Neil, Mark Henry, R-Truth, and Neville. Neville is in a rap group so he fits in. The backstage joke was race though.

League of Nations were talking in the back.. that is about it.

Neville, Titus O’Neil, Mark Henry, R-Truth vs. Cosmic Wasteland and Tyler Breeze

• Tyler better be pushed, since Zoolander 2 is coming out, the cross promotion would be marvelous.
• The crowd is chanting something, I’m not sure what.
• O’ Neil is just throwing The Ascension around he ring.
• Stardust tags in and his character work is top shelf. Even on headlocks he puts his foot in the air and screams a bit. After a clothesline, Stardust dances ands.
• This match has me falling asleep with Konnor and R-Truth in there.
• Titus got the hot tag, tried a cute little move with Mark Henry, a Word’s Strongest Slam and Red Arrow by Neville for the win.

And I’m Like… Losing focus by the last match of the night. I know that didn’t get much of a story but there wasn’t much of a story before the match. Let’s just get through this damn Highlight Reel.

Highlight Reel with Roman Reigns and Brock Lesnar

• Jericho is in the ring, this time with a vest and without a shirt.
• Heyman comes out and Jericho tells him to shut up.
• Heyman says Brock Lesnar is focused on Roman Reigns so Jericho will be spared.
• This Highlight Reel has no TV or Jeritron and no chairs
• Heyman says Lesnar was never defeated for the WWE Championship and that’s why Paul wanted Brock to have a bye past the Royal Rumble.
• This is dragging.

Brock Lesnar comes out

• Jericho was talking a being in the final two with Lesnar, that brought Brock out.

Roman comes out mid-Lesnar entrance.

• Reigns is pacing back and forth in the ring while Brock walks around outside of the ring
• Roman lays the belt down, Lesnar gets in the ring and gets hit with a Spear by Roman. League of Nations come out to beat up on Roman.
• Lesnar is now destroying the League.
• Roman Reigns hits a spear on Lesnar again. Bray Wyatt’s screen graphic hits.
• The Wyatts surround the ring and Roman takes the fight to Braun. Harper takes out Reigns with a discus clothesline. Bray hits Sister Abigail.
• The Wyatt’s see Brock stirring, Bray sicks his Family on them.
• Bray tells Rowan and Harper to pick up Brock. Bray hits Sister Abigail on Lesnar and screams “The Royal Rumble is MINE, Mine, MINE!!”

And I’m Like… That was pretty interesting. It will be pretty exciting this Sunday. There are about 5 names that could win it and this episode cause more doubt than ever on who will be champion!

Please like and share if ya could.

Thanks for reading, you all have a good week before the Rumble.

Have a good one

-Jake