Viva La Lucha Libre
Lucha Underground 2/18/15
Written by Mark Adam Haggerty
It's another down-and-dirty week for the stars of Lucha Underground, who left no shortage of blood and tears inside the squared circle. In fact I'm positive Sexy Star finished the main event with fewer teeth than before. The developing controversy involving "Black Lotus" is further explored over the course of the broadcast, but the real story inside the Boyle Heights Temple is the championship title hunt. What will become of the Lucha Underground championship, and how will the AAA heavyweight rivalry between Patron and Texano affect the legitimacy of the homegrown belt? This week was action packed from start to finish, "book-ended" by duel main events, featuring the surprise return of Big Ryck. So let's take a few moments and celebrate this week in Mexican wrestling excitement—it's "Viva La Lucha Libre!"
Matt Striker is the first face we see this week, as he and Vampiro sit ringside per usual, preparing for an epic night of international athleticism. The opening contest is the first of the "book-ended" double main event, featuring Chavo Guerrero in his quest to defeat the sinister Mil Muertes. This rivalry stems from their initial interaction during Lucha Underground's debut, where a then-babyface Chavo Guerrero came to aid Blue Demon against the monstrous Mil. Muertes is without his usual valet Catrina, which makes no difference as he sets to square off against Chavo. Mil gains the upper hand from the early going, using his size-advantage and knowledge of the ringside area to dissect the former world champion. Before long, Catrina appears on the staircase and descends down into the Temple, where Mil soon becomes distracted by her venomous allure. Chavo attempts a Dragon-steiner out of the corner but is caught by Muertes, who commands respect out of the life-long "cruiserweight." Mil becomes enamored with Catrina once more, allowing Chavo the chance to reach a steel chair at ringside. He wallops the giant, but doesn't cause any damage—Mil Muertes stood his ground. Senior referee Marty Elias called for the bell, awarding the match to Mil on account of disqualification. But the battle was far from over. Muertes took Chavo in one arm and delivered a flooring Flatliner onto the chair. Catrina attempted to leave, but Mil forced her into the ring and guided her face alongside that of Chavo's. He commanded her to lick Guerrero's face, the same as she has done to Mil's previous victims. When she refused, Mil decided to give her a Flatliner as well. The crowd screamed as Muertes prepared to break her neck, but the carnage came to a screeching halt thanks to Fenix. The high-flying luchador sprinted to the squared-circle, retrieved Catrina, and retreated from whence he came. As they escaped, Catrina looked back at Mil and punctuated the predicament with a deep kiss to her hero, Fenix.
Just before the commercial break, we see Black Lotus, the mysterious Asian woman from weeks past, picking her way into the dark hallway leading to Matanza's cell. Back from the break and Dario Cueto is in his office speaking with the Crew. The trio is now official, sporting identical jerseys with their names embroidered on the back. This is especially helpful for those of us having trouble remembering which one is Cisco and which one is Castro—we all know who Bael is! Dario tells the group that he is rewarding them for their hard work with a main event match tonight. But "El Jefe" requires proof that the way they dismantled Big Ryck was more than just a fluke, he wants them to take out whomever may oppose the Dario Cueto regime. Tonight the Crew will need to defeat "three unlikely heroes"—Sexy Star, Mascarita Sagrada and Pimpenela Escarlata. Dario calls them freaks, saying that he's sick of how popular they've become, and wants the Crew to "hurt them so bad, that they never come back."
Back inside the Temple and we get to see my favorite Mariachi band on American television, Mariachi El Bronx! The group plays to an enthused number of fans, as Ivelisse and Son of Havok take the stage. Ivelisse takes the microphone, and tells the Faithful that since Havok can't seem to win a match, she'll take his place tonight against Angelico. This doesn't seem to sit well with Havok, but he does as he's told and vacates the ring, allowing the "baddest bitch in the building" the chance to shine. Angelico enters and is at first unaware of how to mix-it-up with a female competitor. He keeps her at a safe distance and thwarts her offense all he can before tying up and treating her just the same as any luchador. Angelico is an incredible talent who has the total package necessary to succeed. He's talented, he's good looking, he's tall, and he can speak despite having a thick South African accent. I think Angelico is perhaps one to watch in regards to NXT poaching Lucha Underground wrestlers come the tail-end of their contracts. Ivelisse walked away with a hard-fought win over Angelico, proving that she has what it takes, while Son of Havok might not. Following the bell, Angelico asked for the mic and said, "Ivelisse—if you ever want to go one-on-one with me without your boyfriend around, it’d be my pleasure.” The couple staggered out in disbelief while the defeated Angelico winked and stood tall as though winning the bout.
Up next is the highly-anticipated in-ring debut of former AAA world heavyweight champion Texano Jr. In addition to holding the belt longer than anyone in history, over two years, Texano was also the youngest AAA champion in history. That is, until Alberto El Patron reemerged on the Mexican wrestling scene and took it– stole it, as Texano might say. The young former-champion is set to engage with Lucha legend Super Fly, but before the match can get underway, Vampiro presents a pre-recorded interview with Texano en Español! The interview began on a positive note, with Vampiro introducing him as a world renowned wrestler known in Japan and Mexico. But when Vamp' referred to Texano Jr. as an ex -AAA champion, the 30-year old cowboy took exception. "You are in the presence of a top star," he began, "And I will be the next superstar in the Lucha underground.” Vampiro begrudgingly disagreed, saying Patron is the man because he is the one in possession of the title. Texano became enraged, saying that Patron stole the belt, and that the only reason he's in Lucha Underground is to destroy Alberto El Patron and take what's his. The match is finally able to begin where Texano Jr. and Super Fly start with a seesaw of chain wrestling until Texano gains the edge through a series of well-placed knife-edge chops. Super Fly, the veteran, is not to be outdone by a punk kid such as Texano, and leaps from the top rope, catching the former-champion with a flying cross-body. Texano, now groggy, managed to return the favor in the form of a beautiful can-opener leg drop followed by a rolling neck breaker for the 1-2-3. When the bell sounded, Alberto El Patron appeared at the top of the stairs, ready for vengeance following last week's blindside assault. Texano ran for cover, but was cut-off by Patron, who dragged him back into the ring and proceeded to beat him with his own bull rope.
Backstage in Dario Cueto's office once more and the "Machine" known as Cage walks through the door, wearing the tattered and torn title belt around his neck. He demands a championship match, an opportunity Dario would love to give him, but the truth is that Prince Puma is still the Lucha Underground champion. And the last time Cage wrestled Puma, he lost. Dario says that he's going to give Cage another chance—next week the "Machine" will have a non-title bout with Prince Puma, and if he wins, will receive a championship match in the very near future. Cage reluctantly agrees, but warns Cueto he'd better get a "real" title belt and not some "Aztec piece of crap." Cage exits, and passes an infuriated Chavo Guerrero on his way out. Chavo has his gear packed and his bag draped over his shoulder and tells Cueto that he's had enough. He's going home to be with his family—Chavo quits! Dario completely no-sold Guerrero's resignation by simply saying, "Whatever Chavo. I wish you the best in all your future endeavors." Chavo was even angrier, but Cueto assured him that the doors to his Temple are always open.
Black Lotus is sneaking through the darkened depths of the Temple, down in the bowels of Boyle Heights. She's managed to locate Matanza and infiltrate the secret passage without needing to steal Cueto's key. As she drew closer to the caged beast, she spoke soft but definitively: "So this is where he keeps you locked up? When I was a little girl all I wanted to be when I grew up was the woman who killed you with my bare hands."
The final break has come and gone and we're locked in for the main event six-person tag contest. The Crew is already in the ring awaiting the "Freaks," as Dario referred to them. The festive music soon begins to play and Sexy Star leads the mini sensation Mascarita Sagrada and the eccentric exotico Pimpenela Escarlata to the ring. Dario says that he's sick of how popular these characters have been, which begs the question as to why he brought them to his Temple in the first place? The Crew dominates through most of the match with the mismatched trio of Star, Sagrada and Escarlata gaining individual advantages but never as a whole. The Crew is a long-time team and used proper ring psychology to single out each Luchador until they were effectively eliminated. By the midway point, both Mascarita Sagrada and Pimpenela Escarlata were nowhere to be seen, allowing the Crew to capitalize on a 3-on-1 advantage over Sexy Star. The three Mexican gangsters put her through her paces, kicking her face so hard that blood gushed from between her lips as she struggled to regain composure. Sexy is finally able to even the odds by administering an abundance of arm-drags and high-flying offense, as well as a low-blow which pops the crowd like nothing else. While I'm still not one to walk the "Bael Trail," I'm starting to come around to Mr. Cisco and Castro Cortez, a journeyman duo dating back to the dark days of Wrestling Society X. Sexy Star still appears to be the only active member of her team with Sagrada and Escarlata recuperating on the outside mats. The Crew attacked Sexy with a fury of kicks, and simultaneously signaled that the end was near. As the Crew prepared the finish the job assigned to them by Dario Cueto, their arch enemy Big Ryck arrived on the scene. Ryck was now clean shaven and sporting an eye-patch thanks to the attack he suffered at the hands of the Crew. The Distraction played well for Sexy Star as she was able to take advantage of Bael and secure a pinfall in the process. Ryck entered the ring alongside a bloody-mouthed, yet-victorious �Star. The Crew cursed both Big Ryck and the Lucha Underground fans as they retreated into Dario's office, humiliated after having been defeated by Sexy Star.
Big Ryck's return might spell certain doom for the Crew, but what does it mean in terms of his presence in the locker room? For months, Ryck ran roughshod over Lucha Underground, making a number of enemies in the wake of his destruction. Who, if anyone, can Ryck rely on to even the odds against Dario Cueto and the Crew? Next week's episode will feature the long-awaited rematch between Cage and Prince Puma, whereby if Cage is victorious, he will earn a championship title match in the near future. Until then, this has been Mark Adam Haggerty with "Viva La Lucha Libre."
