Last night was AAA's flagship show of the year— Triple Mania —presented across America in both Espanol as well as English. This is the fourth Triple Mania for yours truly and I was ecstatic to learn the event would be broadcast in my native tongue. Japanese wrestling with Japanese commentary is okay because it's so gosh darn different. But Mexican wrestling with Spanish commentary is like: "Okay Mark, we know you took Spanish for four years. We know you grew up in the shadow of New York City. And we know you lived in Los Angeles for five years. But you still don't understand this—the most basic of the Romance Languages!" The duo positioned at ringside for us Gringos is Hugo Savinovich—longtime WWE Spanish broadcaster—and Matt Striker. Striker is of course the voice of Lucha Underground, and was one half of Wrestle Kingdom's English broadcast team with Jim Ross. An epic show capped off with one-of-a-kind theatrics only AAA is capable of producing. Let's jump into the card, and I'll give my overall rating during the close.
Atomicos Match
Daga, Mamba, Mini Psycho and Sexy Star vs.
DinastГa
,
Drago
,
Goya Kong
and
Pimpenela Escarlata
The opening contest for
Triple Mania 23—
as is the custom—is an
Atomicos Match
. The Atomicos' is a AAA signature wherein a standard male competitor is partnered with a female. And they are partnered with a mini wrestler. And they are then partnered with an
exotico
! It's literally all four types of professional wrestler on one team versus a team maintained of the exact same composition. Tonight it's Daga partnered with the youthful transgendered Mamba, along with the smaller-sized Mini Psycho, and the beautiful Sexy Star. Their opposition is comprised of the
current
AAA Mini Champion Dinastía, the large-and-in-charge Goya Kong,
Lucha Underground's
own Drago, and the most famous exotico under the sun—Pimpenela Escarlata! This is a fun way to start the show without much to report in terms of workrate. Matt Striker and Hugo Savinovich are just finding their footing as far as working alongside one another, therefore the commentary is awkward and full of inconsistencies. The MVP of the match in my view was most certainly Goya Kong, who I was previously unfamiliar with until very recently. Hugo ventured a guess that the 200-pound Goya weighs in around 400 pounds, prompting Striker to say: "Uh—Goya, that was Hugo who said that." Your winners thanks to uncanny teamwork and tecnico charm are Dinastía, Drago, Goya, and Pimpenela.
Winner:
DinastГa
,
Drago
,
Goya Kong
and
Pimpenela Escarlata
Rating: *3/4
Los Villanos vs. Los Psycho Circus
Although I host my own podcast and write my own wrestling column, I still put a ton of stock in
rival
wrestling pundits, the "Voices of Wrestling." Prior to this bout, Joe Lanza hypothesized a memorable match, despite an unadulterated lack of ability. For those who might not keep up on the comings and goings of
Lucha Libre
, this is the retirement match for Villano III—who is currently 63 years old. After an incredibly boring contest, the Villanos walk away with the inevitable victory over their humble adversaries. When the match concluded, the Psycho Circus convened with the Villanos and other member of the Mendoza family, as well as AAA officials including Joaquin Roldan. They celebrated the career of Villano III and the fans in attendance thanked the Lucha legend for his years of service to the industry.
Winner: Los Villanos
Rating: 3/4*
Three-Way Trios Cage Match for the AAA Trios Championship
Los Gueros del Cielo vs. Los Hell Brothers vs. Texano Jr., Texano Jr., El Hijo del Fantasma
This is poised to be match of the night. That is unless Rey Mysterio pulls out a miracle and delivers on the grandest stage of them all [in Mexico]. It's a three way six-sides of steel for the AAA
Trios Championship
. Fenix comes to the ring to Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre, while his partners Angelico and Jack Evans enters to a "Lose Yourself" riff preceding their regular theme song. Their opponent Pentagon, is paired with El Hijo Del Fantasma—aka King Cuerno—who comes to the ring to "Welcome to the Jungle" by Guns �N' Roses. This is the first United States pay-per-view for
Lucha Libre
since 1994's "When World's Collide" featuring Mike Tenay and WCW. I'll be curious to see if there are any lawsuits to be had over the
flagrant
disregard of American copyright laws during this event. Their partner is the former—and longest reigning—Mega Heavyweight world champion, Texano Jr. The champions are
Los Hell Brothers
—made up of Chessman, Cibernetico, and Averno. There were a number of well-established spots throughout the match, but the combination of
nine
Luchadores in one match made for some confusing action. Not to mention this match went down during the
PEAK
of the audio problems. Some of the feedback and warbling made it almost dizzying to watch the show.
Winner: Los Hell Brothers
Rating: *3/4
Blue Demon Jr. and La Parka vs. Electroshock and El Mesias
There's something inexplicably intimidating about Electroshock. Maybe it's the German heavy metal that escorts him to the ring, or perhaps the
Bane/Glacier-
like mask he wears. I don't know! His partner is El Mesias aka Ricky Banderas aka Mil Muertes—the
current
Lucha Underground champion. Their opponents are La Parka and Blue Demon Jr. La Parka is
not
—I REPEAT
NOT
—the original La Park featured in "WCW/NWO Revenge" on the Nintendo 64.
That
La Parka is currently performing as "L.A. Park" because AAA took his gimmick. Kind of like how this show is headlined by Myzteziz instead of Sin Cara. La Parka comes out to Michael Jackson and Blue Demon comes out to "Around the World" by the Red Hot Chili Peppers. Sorry, but Californians know
every
RHCP song and its title like it's our social security number. I'm done discussing AAA and how their getting sued for musical infringement or whatever the "lawyers" might call it. And yes—I'm air quoting lawyer. I'm also getting incredibly intoxicated on Corona Light. Hey! When in Rome! Or Tijuana, I guess. Blue Demon Jr. gets the win over Cibernetico with his signature submission hold. Between the undercard and main events of the evening, we get a Hall of Fame ceremony featuring the induction of Hector Garza. The Hall of Fame is translated to "Salon de la Fama," and in addition to Garza, we get the induction of Hijo de Perro Aguayo. The commentators seem to be trading the one working headset at this point, and Hugo Savinovich helps narrate this video package.
Winner: Blue Demon Jr. and La Parka
Rating: *
Lucha de Apuestas (Hair vs. Hair)
Alberto El Patron vs. Brian Cage
Without much to speak for up unto this point, it's time for the semi-main event featuring a "
Lucha de Apuestas"—
commonly known in America as a "Hair versus Hair" match. Brian Cage is my favorite Luchador of all time. He comes to the ring with the Stars and Stripes swaying behind his intensely-statured physique. Not only is he escorted to the ring by an entourage of turncoat-Mexicanos such as Hijo del Fantasma, but he's wearing a
DONALD TRUMP 2016
t-shirt. His opponent is Alberto El Patron—the former WWE Champion otherwise known as
Alberto Del Rio
. Patron comes to the ring with what seems to be an almost-
offensive
mariachi band playing behind him, but I guess not
ALL
stereotypes are false? I don't know. This was an absolutely fantastic match. It seemed like this pay-per-view had trouble getting started until these two performers entered the fray. Perhaps it's a cultural thing that I'm overlooking? I just think this has been a terribly
underwhelming
show up until now, and this bout woke me up! Brian Cage is known to
Lucha Underground
audiences by his surname alone—
CAGE!
Both of these men were featured in �
Underground's
season finale dubbed "Ultima Lucha." Cage battled Willie Mack as part of "Penultima Lucha," and Patron opened the show opposite Johnny Mundo. There was little doubt in anyone's mind who would walk away victorious. Table and chairs were introduced and skin was broken, but in the end, it was a mere arm-bar that won the day for Alberto El Patron. "The Machine" Brian Cage was then shaved bald with his "hombres" on hand spouting nonsense at the camera. After his head was shaved, Cage went after Patron, who was ready with a powerbomb. Patron left Cage lying in the center of the ring with the Mexican flag draped across his chest.
Winner: Alberto El Patron
Rating: ****
Myzteziz vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.
Between main events,
Simon Peg—
"Shawn of the Dead," "Hot Fuzz," and "Mission: Impossible"—made a cameo via the screen above the ring. This was precisely when AAA finally fixed their audio/video troubles. Peg welcomed fans to the "most exciting wresting experience" they could hope for, and invited them to attend his new movie—"Mission: Impossible 5"—in theaters now. This led to an
M:I
style introduction for both Rey Mysterio as well as Myzteziz. The former "Sin Cara" descended from the ceiling ala Tom Cruise in the first
Mission: Impossible
film. He's also wearing a chainmail. You know—that medieval headdress that Scott Steiner used to wear? Sin Cara looks like the "Bodies Exhibit." Not as much as Electroshock, but it's pretty bad. All of these outfits are pretty terrible. Like—Max Moon-levels of god-awful. Rey Mysterio is coming to the ring to generic "Cholo Rap" that sort of sounds like
Public Enemy
's theme in WCW. He's also got wings, by the way. I forgot to mention the fact that Rey Mysterio is wearing fucking wings on his back. He looks like Seth Rollins but with a mask. Oh, and wings. Big ass wings. The main event more-than delivered in my opinion, in that I assumed Rey Mysterio was all-but washed-up—and I thought Myzteziz was a
LITTLE
lazy during his run with WWE. Boy was I wrong. I guess I was born into this indoctrinated society in which Hulk Hogan was somehow a "champion," and am therefore gullible upon first impression. This was a
DREAM MATCH
in every sense of the word. Both wrestlers get the better of their opponent but it's only a matter of time before experience trumps the cavalier attitude of Myzteziz. Myzteziz hit Rey with his own 619 signature hold for a near fall, but Rey was able to lock the younger Luchador in a Fujiwara Arm Bar. He then hit a
619
of his own, followed by another arm bar for the submission victory. After the match, Myzteziz is attacked by Pentagon, Averno, and Lider. Lider brings a staple gun to the fight, which gives Rey Mysterio reason to interject. After performing his "Good Samaritan" duties however, Rey is overwhelmed by the trio. Myzteziz and Rey are forced to coexist and hit their rivals with a double-619. Myzteziz captured the staple gun and attacked "Extreme" Joe Liber in the face and chest. Before Triple Mania concluded, Myzteziz turned heel and challenged Rey to a rematch. He became exceptionally aggressive and challenge Rey to a Mask versus Mask match, and powerbombed him through the announce table. The English Announce table, by the way.
Winner: Rey Mysterio Jr.
Rating: ***3/4
I think this was the greatest hand social media has ever played in a wrestling event. Seriously. The show was plagued by audio issues, prompting Matt Striker to say things like, "Let me know on Twitter if you can hear Hugo." I thought this was a rather dull show for AAA, but an especially exciting event for the current state of wrestling in 2015. If I had to give the broadcast a grade based upon cinematics, pageantry, as well as workrate, I'd go with a B+. But in terms of averaging star ratings, this show walks away with a 2¼. Until next time, please LIKE "The B+ Players Podcast" on Facebook , and FOLLOW me on Twitter for all the latest and greatest updates courtesy of Cheap-Heat , Gutbusters , and Daily Wrestling News !
